# Probably Shouldn't have said that....



## BassoonEMT (Mar 22, 2017)

35 y/o m diabetic, bgl 30. After we get him up, doing the usual "what'd you eat, how much insulin". He says "yeah I ate, I ate a lot like the fatass I am". Guy had a bit of a gut, but definitely not "fat" (not for 'murrica at least). Especially with the large patients we get... I say something about him not being fat, and he goes "dude, trust me, when I look down I can't see my d*ck, i'm fat". We all laugh.

Fast forward to the truck, he says the same line again for the 2nd or 3rd time. I shrug and say "I mean, maybe you just have a small d*ck".

Fortunately he laughed too. I figured he would, we had that kind of rapport going. But still you never know...

Anybody have any moments where you prooobably shouldn't have said that? (I'm sure you all have several... whether you realize or not)


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## NomadicMedic (Mar 22, 2017)

I can usually tell right off the bat if I can play with a patient or not.

I walked into a house and saw a guy who was gray, diaphoretic and looked like he was fixin' to die. I said my usual, 'What's goin' on?" and he looked at me chucked and said, 'I feel like ****." I laughed a little and replied, "Well, you look like ****, so lets get goin' to the hospital and get you straightened out." We all laughed, but might not have been the best thing to say.

My style of rapport with patients is usually pretty loose. I'm not particularly worried about offending anyone.


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## VentMonkey (Mar 22, 2017)

What @NomadicMedic said: do it long enough you'll know your crowd; you'll know when, and where you should, or shouldn't be the comedian.

Also, something I learned was it's a tad harder for younger EMS-folks to get away with such capers with conviction, and delivery. Judging by your thrillingly hilarious avatar you are one such younger provider?

Either way, intuition is something some people have a nack for, and others don't. The ones that do typically make for a better provider on the whole.


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## BassoonEMT (Mar 22, 2017)

The reason I added my comment about rapport was to avoid the "well I'm great I know when I can get away with things. You have to gauge each patient. Blah blah blah"

Never expected it to turn into a "young providers can't do this, but old ones can". Good job. 

Keep on judging.


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## DrParasite (Mar 22, 2017)

You know..... I can joke around with many people, especially people who relocate from the north east down here..... fortunately, I never had a problem talking to people.

What you might want to watch out for is not the patient who files the complaint, but the family member, roommate, bystander, or any one else who disagrees with something you say or do, even if it's not the patient himself.  And yes, I was dragged into an investigation over something my partner did (which wasn't the best thing he could have done, but probably not the best), where it wasn't the patient who filed the complaint, it was the guy he lived with.


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## BassoonEMT (Mar 22, 2017)

Well good thing I made sure to say this when nobody was around.... 

Every time I come back to this forum I'm quickly reminded why I stay off for months at a time.


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## VentMonkey (Mar 22, 2017)

VentMonkey said:


> What
> [QUOTE="BassoonEMT, post: 641483, member: 18246"]The reason I added my comment about rapport was to avoid the "well I'm great I know when I can get away with things. You have to gauge each patient. Blah blah blah"
> 
> Never expected it to turn into a "young providers can't do this, but old ones can". Good job.
> ...



[COLOR=#000000]I don't think I ever said younger providers [I]can't[/I], just that it's [I]"a tad harder"[/I]. I have been both providers, and have said foolish things myself. I also put a question mark in the same sentence as my judging remark because, well, it's merely that, a shot in the dark. For all I know we may be the same age. Maybe you're older than me, rendering my remark completely false. 

I also never said your thread title doesn't indicate you weren't aware of your mistake. Again, we all make them, right? What I meant by my statement about your avatar is that it may be meant as humorous to you, hey maybe to others on here as well. That's cool, but as a father of two fast growing girls, who lives in a house full of women, well it isn't exactly in good taste [U][I]to me[/I][/U], but hey that's just me:). Couple the avatar with the call you posted in which you accidentally made a foolish remark, I was hoping it would enlighten you more than offend you. Either way, no skin off my back.[/COLOR]


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## BassoonEMT (Mar 22, 2017)

And I never said it was an accident that I said it. 
You're doing a lot of assuming and griping over what was meant has a funny post. You know, being in "EMS humor" and all. 

I'm not looking for advice from the wise sages. But enjoy your pedistal and your forum burnout, which is apparently a thing.


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## Chimpie (Mar 22, 2017)

BassoonEMT said:


> You're doing a lot of assuming and griping over what was meant has a funny post.


I just read this thread for the first time, and in my opinion, you're blowing what he said WAY out of proportion. There was no ill intent involved. I think you just read it wrong.



BassoonEMT said:


> But enjoy your pedistal and your forum burnout, which is apparently a thing.


And with that I'm going to say, *knock it off*. Comments like that only entice a reaction/argument. It's not going to happen today.


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## CALEMT (Mar 22, 2017)

BassoonEMT said:


> You're doing a lot of assuming and griping over what was meant has a funny post.



Woah dude, you might want to ease off the gas pedal here. He's just suggesting that newer medics may or may not sense when its okay to joke around with the patient. You're making this into something that its not, were not looking to argue over here so you may want to chill. As far as your original post should vs shouldn't we can't tell. We weren't on scene and we didn't feel the vibe, were only reading about it in a context in our own minds. From what you've said it seems like a fairly lax call. I don't see anything wrong with it. 

Also, as a friendly suggestion... don't piss off the one named Chimpie... he'll swallow your soul.


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## Qulevrius (Apr 12, 2017)

CALEMT said:


> he'll swallow your soul



And crap it out in small star-of-life shaped bricks.


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## StCEMT (Apr 12, 2017)

Qulevrius said:


> And crap it out in small star-of-life shaped bricks.


Um, Ouch?


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## Qulevrius (Apr 12, 2017)

He's been a mod for this long, his arse can handle it 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Onceamedic (Apr 12, 2017)

Patient being transported literally across the street from the mall to the ED. 
She says "hey, wait a minute.  How much is this going to cost?"
Me:  Approximately 1,300$ ma'am"
Patient: Are you joking me?  That's crazy"
Me: I'm a trained professional.
Patient:  <stares>
Me:  And I get 10 bucks of that....


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## SunshineCamo (Apr 12, 2017)

I just always tell people I work with to go slow. I've made the mistake of thinking I could make jokes/talk a certain to a patient too quickly and had to apologize (fortunately not for anything major). Even with frequent fliers, or people he seem like I can joke, I still stay a little reserved.

But I've often seen new EMT/Medics (who, yes, tend to be a little younger) who come right out like their talking to their bestfriend in a private setting. Based on what you said it might not have been the best thing, but it seems like the guy was cool with cracking jokes so it was fine.


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## Akulahawk (Apr 13, 2017)

With time and experience, you do learn when it's appropriate to say certain things, and more importantly, when _not_ to. It is very true that often someone that complains about being offended wasn't the patient but someone else that was on-scene close enough to hear or see something. This is why you need to take a look at the entire scene (think of it as "scene safety") and establish a good rapport with everyone there _or_ wait until you're alone in the truck before cutting loose, so to speak, and well within the limits of the rapport you have with your patient.


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## johnrsemt (Apr 18, 2017)

If saying something feels good and you think it is funny;  YOUR WRONG.  Especially when you are talking to ECF or ED nurses.    It always gets back to the boss


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