# New Job



## Sasha (Jan 18, 2009)

Bahaha. 


> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job* Sasha *is a tree surgeon. Good luck in your new career.



http://www.jobpredictor.com/


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## fortsmithman (Jan 18, 2009)

> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Arliss is a Rally Car Driver. Good luck in your new career.
> 
> http://www.jobpredictor.com/




Next off to indy


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## exodus (Jan 18, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Thomas is a Rally Car Driver. Good luck in your new career. 

And to think, just this weekend, I was pretty much doing a rally out in the desert in my uncles jeep... lol


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## NomadicMedic (Jan 18, 2009)

> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Rob is a foreign legion. Good luck in your new career.



Ainsi, je joindrai la légion étrangère.


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## fortsmithman (Jan 18, 2009)

n7lxi said:


> Ainsi, je joindrai la légion étrangère.


Legio patria nostra.


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## lightsandsirens5 (Jan 18, 2009)

fortsmithman said:


> Next off to indy



Same here!



> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Joseph is a Rally Car Driver. Good luck in your new career.



Unless I go by Joe:



> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Joe is a car mechanic. Good luck in your new career.





OH COOL! If I put my whole name in I get to be president!
 rofl


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## Arkymedic (Jan 18, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job is anything where you can kiss ***. Good luck in your new career.

So government is a good choice? 


Sasha said:


> Bahaha.
> 
> 
> http://www.jobpredictor.com/


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## Epi-do (Jan 18, 2009)

> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Lisa is a Crash Test Dummy. Good luck in your new career.



Just think of all the cool rides I am gonna get to check out!


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## Vonny (Jan 18, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Vonny is a *Village Idiot*. Good luck in your new career. 

Well I think our village has enough idiots! There are no openings....


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## mjg0519 (Jan 18, 2009)

> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Michael Griffin is another Satan !. Good luck in your new career.



Ok then...lol


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## imurphy (Jan 18, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Ian Murphy is another Satan !. Good luck in your new career. 

AWESOME! That is the job I ALWAYS wanted!!


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## daedalus (Jan 18, 2009)

My ideal job is a Nun.
:sad:

But hey, its my 500th post! not that im keeping track or anything :glare:


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## ffemt8978 (Jan 18, 2009)

That could be fun...



> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job *ffemt8978* is a Rally Car Driver. Good luck in your new career.


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## Jon (Jan 18, 2009)

your ideal job *Jon* is a Crash Test Dummy

Wow. Given my recent luck in vehicles... it is too true.

Full first name: Village Idiot
Full Name:  Hypnotist


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## EMTinNEPA (Jan 19, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job your mother is a Monkey Impressionist. Good luck in your new career.


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## DR_KSIDE (Jan 19, 2009)

*HAHAHAHAHA......bow down...hahaha*

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job My Full Name is an Emperor of all the world. Good luck in your new career.


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## psychomedic (Feb 22, 2009)

my new job is chef...... now that should keep fire busy for a while.. when the smoke detector goes off dinner is served..lol


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## WarDance (Feb 23, 2009)

Professional tramp?  Looks like I need to change my major!


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## WarDance (Feb 23, 2009)

Oh and if I put in my full name it's shoplifter!  It just keeps getting better and better!


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## emtfarva (Feb 23, 2009)

depending on what name i used:

Driving instructor
Shoplifter
Rally car driver


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## medic417 (Feb 23, 2009)

On mine it said Paramedic.  Darn you guys get all the fun jobs.


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## Second (Feb 24, 2009)

I got topless model... wow... um yea I dont think that ones going to work out for me I dont think I have the um.... qualifications


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## DavethetrainWreck (Feb 24, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job David C Wreck is a Office Gopher. Good luck in your new career. 

what a bunch of crap. I could never work in an office.


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## paemt08 (Feb 25, 2009)

*Lol*



> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Jennifer is a Playing for an American football team. Good luck in your new career.



um, I don't think I have the proper build 

My full name was a Topless Model :glare:


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## sir.shocksalot (Feb 25, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job My Full Name is a Jungle Explorer. Good luck in your new career.

Hell yeah, screw this career path, I'll be in the woods, playing survivorman.


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## Arkymedic (Feb 25, 2009)

lmao just don't get bit or hurt.



sir.shocksalot said:


> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job My Full Name is a Jungle Explorer. Good luck in your new career.
> 
> Hell yeah, screw this career path, I'll be in the woods, playing survivorman.


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## RDUNNE (Apr 8, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Ryan is anything where you can kiss ***. Good luck in your new career. 

make sure i bring a toothbrush and toothpaste to work.....


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## Medic506 (Apr 26, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Lauren is a Hypnotist. Good luck in your new career. 


Well, that's not so different and yet I'll get paid more!  I'm in!!


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## WannaBeFlight (May 10, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Lauren is an Air Stewardess. Good luck in your new career. 


  Description Score   
Salary 4/10   
Education 7/10   
Job Satisfaction  9/10   
Community Contribution  7/10   
Pulling Power  8/10   
Uniform 8/10   
Total 43/60


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## armywifeemt (May 29, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Kaleigh  is an Emperor of all the world. Good luck in your new career. 


Wouldn't I technically be an Empress?


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## Mountain Res-Q (May 29, 2009)

Nice

If I go by my fist name only I should be A TOPLESS MODEL

If I go my my last name only I should be A LUMBERJACK

If I go by my first and last name I should be A STAND UP COMEDIAN

If I go by my full name (with middle) I should be A TEASMAID

If I go by Mtn Res-q I should be THE PRESIDENT!!!



WHY CAN'T I BE IT ALL???  I topless lumberjack who serves tea while dictating national policy... which is often a joke?


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## HotelCo (May 29, 2009)

Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Derek is a Monkey Impressionist. Good luck in your new career.


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## Seaglass (May 29, 2009)

> Hey thanks for your query, I have checked out everything about you and I predict that your ideal job Sea is a Sewage Worker. Good luck in your new career.
> 
> Salary
> 2/10
> ...



I knew I shouldn't have skipped school on those days when took field trips to the sewage plant...


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## VFFforpeople (May 29, 2009)

Mountain Res-Q said:


> Nice
> 
> If I go by my fist name only I should be A TOPLESS MODEL
> 
> ...



Because then you would up class clinton LOL!!


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## JustMarti (May 31, 2009)

I can be anything!
a Housekeeper (they obviously don't know the real me)
an Insurance Fraudster 
or a Lumberjack!


wow, the choices are amazing!


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## blterry (May 31, 2009)

I got topless model too

how bout everyones joke mine was:

The population of the USA is 237 million. 104 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work. There are 85 million in school, which leave 48 million to do the work. Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government. This leaves 19 million to do the work. 4 million are in the Armed Forces, which leaves 15 million to do the work. Take from the total the 14.8 million people who work for State and City Government and that leaves 200,000 to do the work. There are 188,000 in hospitals, so that leaves 12,000 to do the work. Now, there are 11,998 people in Prisons. That leaves Just two people to do the work. You and me. And you're just sitting there reading jokes all day!

An office manager had money problems & had to fire an employee, either Jack or Jill... He thought he'd fire the employee who came late to work the next morning. Well, both employees came to work very early. Then the manager thought he would catch the first one who took a coffee break. Unfortunately, neither employee took a coffee break. Then the manager decided to see who took the longest lunch break - strangely, neither Jack nor Jill took a lunch break that day, they both ate at their desk. Then the manager thought he'd wait & see who would leave work the earliest and both employees stayed after closing. Jill finally went to the coat rack & the manager went up to her & said, 'Jill, I have a terrible problem. I don't know whether to lay you or Jack off.' Jill said, 'Well, you'd better jack off, because I'm late for my bus.'

Steve, Bob, and Jeff were working on a very high scaffolding one day when suddenly, Steve falls off and is killed instantly. After the ambulance leaves with Steve's body, Bob and Jeff realize that one of them is going to have to tell Steve's wife. Bob says he's good at this sort of sensitive stuff, so he volunteers to do the job. After two hours he returns, carrying a six-pack of beer. 'So did you tell her?' asks Jeff.'Yep', replied Bob. 'Say, where did you get the six-pack?' Bob informs Jeff. 'She gave it to me!' 'What??' exclaims Jeff, 'you just told her her husband died and she gave you a six-pack??''Sure,' Bob says.'Why?' asks Jeff. 'Well,' Bob continues, 'when she answered the door, I asked her, 'are you Steve's widow?' 'Widow?', she said, 'no, no, you're mistaken, I'm not a widow!' So I said: 'I'll bet you a six-pack you ARE!''


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