# Non-working behavioral emergency?



## bry55n92 (Mar 3, 2012)

So here's a little background. I'm a newly certified EMT-B in MA. I'm still looking for work and have never been employed in EMS before, which is why I'm not sure what I should do.

My girlfriend has a friend that is constantly talking to her about her desire to commit suicide. My girlfriend talks to me, in detail about it regularly. It's my belief that she's just saying it to get the attention, but i don't want her to actually attempt it and possibly succeed, then if some kind of an investigation gets launched it could blow back on me, because they discuss it over facebook, which will definitely be looked into. I have no doubt it should be reported, I'm not sure how to go about doing so and how to deal with my girlfriend after I do so. This girl has been institutionalized before for this kind of talk. What do I do?


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## firecoins (Mar 3, 2012)

sorry, I don't see how you would be responsible for second hand info.


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## TatuICU (Mar 3, 2012)

Tell your girlfriend that you don't want to hear about it anymore and try to do a better job of keeping toxic people out of your life even if they come via a loved one.

People like that want attention, not help.


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## Handsome Robb (Mar 3, 2012)

Not your problem. How on earth would you be responsible for that? If she wants to whack herself, let her whack herself and don't get yourself involved. The more you involve yourself the worse it's going to be for you and your girl, emotionally not legally.

Tell your gf to find some friends that aren't nut jobs.


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## firetender (Mar 4, 2012)

Your girlfriend's friend needs help. A 72 hour hold won't do it, she needs longer term help.

Your girlfriend, if she chooses to get involved, would best help her by helping her get that help.

YOU are not that help.

You can make clear to your girlfriend that you choose NOT to be involved because you're not trained to provide psychiatric services. You can also make it clear that your girlfriend will have to stop trying to involve you. Even sharing her concerns puts you in the position of feeling obligated to report it. 

"The next time you try and get me involved, what I'll be obligated to do is report it and that means she could be removed from her home and placed into an involuntary hold." 

I don't think either of them want that to happen.

The only problem you have here is finding a diplomatic and honest way to NOT be sucked in to the drama. I think your GF likes it, which is fine but it doesn't have to include you.

It's a limits and boundaries thing.


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## NomadicMedic (Mar 4, 2012)

I thought we didn't offer medical advice on the forum? Mods?


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## Chimpie (Mar 4, 2012)

bry55n92 said:


> I have no doubt it should be reported, I'm not sure how to go about doing so and how to deal with my girlfriend after I do so. This girl has been institutionalized before for this kind of talk. What do I do?



If you feel that it should be reported, than do so.  Call 911 and let them sort it out.



n7lxi said:


> I thought we didn't offer medical advice on the forum? Mods?



I've read through this a couple of times now and the intent of the OP is unclear.  Is he asking what he should do or asking what needs to be done for the girlfriend's friend.

We, as the EMTLife community, shouldn't be giving suggestions on what should be done about the girlfriend's friend.  We can, however, give advice on how to deal with girlfriends/boyfriends/spouses/etc. bringing this information to us.

Note: My opinion may change on the above.  I'm wishy-washy about it right now.

Since I'm not a mental professional (just mental) I cannot and will not provide any kind of advice on what should be done.  I will always err on the side of caution and get the professionals involved.  It gets help to the person who needs it and it takes the liability off of you.


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## NomadicMedic (Mar 4, 2012)

This reminds me of the "I have a friend who has a rash on his penis..." kind of thread. Reeks of soliciting advice to me.


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## abckidsmom (Mar 4, 2012)

Although it sounds a lot like drama, people who threaten suicide on a regular basis tend to get familiar with the idea and sometimes get clever enough to follow through with it. I would strongly encourage your gf who has the first hand hearsay to report this girl to the local mental health authorities. 

In our area, there's a suicide hotline 800 number that is the right one to call. It connects the person with the right people who have the legal authority to step in. 

Sometimes, if the threat to self or others isn't readily apparent enough to activate the 800 number people, the complainant has to appear before a magistrate to see if there is enough risk to issue a TDO based on the report of this person (your gf). 

If, as you say, theres no question that she should be reported, you should call your local police or sheriffs department to find out the proper procedure. This may activate EMS, so it would be a good idea to have had your girlfriend prep the girl and tell her what she's doing. Or maybe not. 

Bottom line, your gut said you should report, you need to figure out how that works. From a human interest perspective mostly, I would be surprised if you had any more duty to act than a layperson in this situation.


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## Chimpie (Mar 4, 2012)

I have had some more time to think about this thread.

Whether it's legal or medical advice you're seeking, we cannot provide it for you.  Since  abckidsmom has done a great job summarizing this thread, I'm going to close it to help protect the community as a whole.

bry55n92, I would suggest you follow up with your local professionals, whether that be a lawyer for legal advice or a medical professional for your girlfriend's friend.


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