# You might be a woman in EMS if...



## Sage (Dec 18, 2013)

After reading the many "You might be in EMS if..." lists, I thought there were a few missing descriptions of women in EMS. This is a good-natured post, I'm not trying to offend anybody and some of these are obvious over-exaggerations, so please keep it light-hearted. So, without further ado: You might be a woman in EMS if:

-You are more comfortable in BDU's/ uniform pants than slacks 

-You carry a wallet instead of a purse. And you bought it in the men's department.

- You've ever bought clothing from the men's department

- You have 2 standard hairstyle options: cropped or in a ponytail

- The men in your agency are scared of you

- You have ever been asked by a man to lift/move something for him

- You've ever pretended to be an airhead in front of a patient just for laughs

-Your partner warns patients about your 'charming personality'

-You own more pairs of boots than heels

-When getting 'dressed up' means changing in to yoga pants/jeans and a FD tee shirt

-You can get your way 99% of the time

- Your everyday makeup consists of mascara and powder, IF your feeling energetic

-You've ever walked into a bad scene and had that pause when all the male FF's and EMT's wait to see if you'll freak out

-The men in your agency are so protective of you that you feel like you have 30 older brothers

- You automatically tuck in your shirt even when you're off-duty

-It took a year for your partner to stop asking if you wanted help 

-You've had that short but... _sweet_ conversation with your partner the first (and last) time he called you honey or sweety 

- Your wardrobe consists of:
    -4 uniform shirts in various 'puffed-out stomach' styles
    -Several uniform pants in a range of up-to-your-ribcage high to crotch-between-your-knees
    -A couple job shirts with your last name embroidered in unromantic block letters
    - A few pair of comfortably worn jeans and sweatpants
    - A stack of FD tee shirts and jackets
    - 1 'sexy' dress that you can't remember the last time you wore

- You've ever want to (or actually) punched a FF/EMT for trying to take things from you or do things for you when you clearly don't need help

- You've ever walked through a room full of FF's/EMT's carrying 2 bags, a backboard and a monitor and no one looked twice or tried to help you

- You don't care if your boyfriend/girlfriend can cook or clean, but they better know how to do compressions and intubate

- You've ever unintentionally scared away a date by telling stories at dinner

- You're the smallest person in your agency, and you would rather go to the garage and get a 5 foot ladder than ask someone to reach something for you



Please add more! 
(These are all original, observations from my experience as a women in EMS. Please do not share/reuse these without giving me credit.)


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## johnrsemt (Dec 26, 2013)

These are funny;
  Reminds me of when my partner and I were precepting a young, small lady:    She had to tell us (Chew us out) to let her lift one end of the cot, to prove that she could do it:   told us  "Stop being gentleman".   Then on the next run she had to tell us "one of you get the other end,  I can't do both"     oops


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## Anjel (Dec 26, 2013)

I've got nothing to prove. It one of the fire guys wants to push me out of the way to lift or take the stuff I'm holding, more power to them. Lol saves my back.


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## mycrofft (Dec 26, 2013)

These are great.
How about this as well:
"Every call to a nursing home means you start speaking in a high cajoling voice and you tousle or pat your patient's head".


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## Anjel (Dec 26, 2013)

mycrofft said:


> These are great.
> 
> How about this as well:
> 
> "Every call to a nursing home means you start speaking in a high cajoling voice and you tousle or pat your patient's head".




Or the same with any call that involves a baby, or animal. Lol


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## mycrofft (Dec 26, 2013)

Anjel said:


> Or the same with any call that involves a baby, or animal. Lol



But EVERYONE who know what their doing does it for babies and animals.


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## Anjel (Dec 26, 2013)

You might be a women if once a month partner stands outside the rig and throws chocolate at you asking if it's safe to get inside. (Happened a couple times lol)


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## Anjel (Dec 26, 2013)

Anjel said:


> You might be a women if once a month partner stands outside the rig and throws chocolate at you asking if it's safe to get inside. (Happened a couple times lol)




*Ha women in Ems


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## unleashedfury (Dec 28, 2013)

Sage said:


> :
> 
> *- You've ever unintentionally scared away a date by telling stories at dinner*



I know for a fact, that me and significant other (shes a nurse) do this alot at dinner. Its just bad when family is over, as we discuss blood guts and other bodily fluids they tend to get the good ol green faces.


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## DrParasite (Dec 30, 2013)

So I heard something last night at work, and it totally relates to women in EMS (but it is serious, and slightly offensive, but I think it is a valid statement)

Senior female ems provider takes new female to EMS and new partner out to dinner. sits her down asks here this very simple, straight forward question: "are you going to be a lesbian, or a slut (wording changed to not offend the censoring police)?"  while immediately taken aback by the statement, new EMS provider says "ummm, neither?"  Senior provider says "good, so make sure you learn your craft, because otherwise people are going to think you are going to fall into one of those two categories."

I know it doesn't apply to everyone, but we all know people that get into this field for the wrong reasons.  and the new partner (now 15 years later) gives the same question to many of the new providers at her job.


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## Anjel (Dec 30, 2013)

I agree with that.


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## mycrofft (Dec 31, 2013)

*Got me started there. A bully and a grandstander are just that.*



DrParasite said:


> So I heard something last night at work, and it totally relates to women in EMS (but it is serious, and slightly offensive, but I think it is a valid statement)
> 
> Senior female ems provider takes new female to EMS and new partner out to dinner. sits her down asks here this very simple, straight forward question: "are you going to be a lesbian, or a slut (wording changed to not offend the censoring police)?"  while immediately taken aback by the statement, new EMS provider says "ummm, neither?"  Senior provider says "good, so make sure you learn your craft, because otherwise people are going to think you are going to fall into one of those two categories."
> 
> I know it doesn't apply to everyone, but we all know people that get into this field for the wrong reasons.  and the new partner (now 15 years later) gives the same question to many of the new providers at her job.



It is a thinly excused premise for being a sexist grandstander, no matter whether it is from a female or a male coworker, supervisor, etc. In fact, if a supervisor is making that sort of remark, sexual harassment could be brought to bear since it could conceivably affect terms of employment. Let her ask that question in front of the boss* if it is that correct an useful. In fact, get it in the new employees' orientation manual. If you can't say something factoring in on someone else'e employment in public or to the boss, then you probably ought not to cop that attitude, mentally or verbally, at all. It'll get out there when the affected worker takes you and the company to court.

If a supervisor has to introduce criteria of conduct or appearance, then do it right, not through a John Wayne imitation.

Even if the employee in question is _either_ (and that is a subjective deal unless we are going to call in Sharia law or something), if she can do the work, and it doesn't create a crappy work environment for anyone not intent on personally certifying her moral conduct and sunny customer attitude, then it doesn't matter. 

Or at least counter with, "I don't know, are you going to be a really irritatingly homophobic misogynist or just a garden variety sort of hostile-work environment-brewing _*former*_ co-worker?".**

I watched women finally get into EMS and firefighting in the late Seventies (after the *first* pioneering women that is), and the field cannot afford that sort of crud re-surfacing.

And a woman doing the same…what does she say to _*male*_ trainees? What does that sort of indirect self put-down say to new workers and females in particular?

*Or ask the boss that question directly. Go ahead. I'll wait…..

** The reply above works for either gender, but if a female says it, comment "Funny, I was going to ask you the same thing!". Then duck.


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## TheLocalMedic (Jan 2, 2014)

I don't have a set partner, so over time I get to work with just about all the EMTs at my company.  I always find it interesting how women will almost universally jump in and grab the heaviest bags to carry.  Like they are constantly trying to prove themselves.  

I finally had to have a sit down conversation with one of my partners about it.  She'd been having some back pain over the last few months, but she kept trying to do all the lifting and carrying.  Even when I volunteered to help or tried to grab a heavy bag she waved me off.  I finally had to explain that I knew full well that she was capable of doing the heavy lifting, but that I didn't want her to blow her back out.  So would she please quit being stoic and actually let me split the work with her?


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## Cera (Jan 5, 2014)

Lol. This is golden.


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## unleashedfury (Jan 6, 2014)

TheLocalMedic said:


> I don't have a set partner, so over time I get to work with just about all the EMTs at my company.  I always find it interesting how women will almost universally jump in and grab the heaviest bags to carry.  Like they are constantly trying to prove themselves.
> 
> I finally had to have a sit down conversation with one of my partners about it.  She'd been having some back pain over the last few months, but she kept trying to do all the lifting and carrying.  Even when I volunteered to help or tried to grab a heavy bag she waved me off.  I finally had to explain that I knew full well that she was capable of doing the heavy lifting, but that I didn't want her to blow her back out.  So would she please quit being stoic and actually let me split the work with her?


.

I had a partner like that, Unfortunately its a anatomical factor that the average female is not as physical strong as the average male. I use average because well you still have individuals who strength condition of both sexes, and those who just are small framed. 

being that I mentioned the above statement alot of females get passed of as "she can't lift, or she'll never make it" she's too small, she's too weak etc. pushes for females to push the limits. and prove to the world or their coworkers that they are perfectly capable of performing the same tasks. if not better than the male counterpart.


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## Rin (Feb 9, 2014)

You might be a woman in EMS if your patients assume you and your partner must be a couple, even though you only met him an hour ago.


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## mycrofft (Feb 9, 2014)

You might be a woman EMS if the elderly patients try to call you "Nurse".

(Sort of like "you know you're a man in nursing when the oldest guys act as though you're gay". WHich is especially tough if THEY _*are*_ gay).


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## Anjel (Feb 10, 2014)

You might be a women in EMS if a patient has ever told you not to lift them because you are going to hurt your ovaries.

I have so many patients worried about my baby making parts. Lol


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## Rin (Feb 11, 2014)

You might be a woman in EMS if you are invisible to (female) nurses, and they look right past you to solely address your male partner.


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## Amber Lance (Feb 22, 2014)

You might be a woman in EMS if your uniform pants (made for men) never fit right, causing you to never feel quite safe bending over, no matter how tight your belt is or how hard you worked at hiking them up beforehand.

EDIT: And this has caused you to casually start up a conversation in the presence of a supervisor about how great it would be if the uniforms were all one piece. Because, safety. Clearly *shifty eyes*


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## Rin (Mar 8, 2014)

You might be a woman in EMS if you had to  cuff under or hem up 6" of your uniform pants to keep them from dragging on the ground XD

You might be a woman in EMS if your heels don't reach the floor when you sit on the back bench seat OTL

You might be a woman in EMS if your partner has to adjust the seat all the way back when it's his turn to drive before he can even think about climbing in the truck.

You also might be a woman in EMS if you've ever had a partner seriously ask for details of what took you so long in the bathroom.  Seriously, just don't ask.


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## Tigger (Mar 8, 2014)

Rin said:


> You might be a woman in EMS if your partner has to adjust the seat all the way back when it's his turn to drive before he can even think about climbing in the truck.



I had to do the same thing last shift with a fillin partner. Said partner was not a woman, that is for sure.


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## UnkiEMT (Mar 8, 2014)

Amber Lance said:


> You might be a woman in EMS if your uniform pants (made for men) never fit right, causing you to never feel quite safe bending over, no matter how tight your belt is or how hard you worked at hiking them up beforehand.
> 
> EDIT: And this has caused you to casually start up a conversation in the presence of a supervisor about how great it would be if the uniforms were all one piece. Because, safety. Clearly *shifty eyes*



I don't know where in NM you are, but Neve's in ABQ stocks several brands of EMS trousers cut specifically for women (The Santa Fe store doesn't have them, nor does Kaufman's), might be worth stopping by and trying some of them on.


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## sendmoreparamedics (Apr 2, 2014)

You might be a woman in EMS if you bought your first pair of boots and they are a men's size and they were the ONLY pair that fit you in the whole store, and okay maybe they are a _little _big but that's okay because that's about as good as it gets.


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## lissa304 (Aug 1, 2014)

sage said:


> after reading the many "you might be in ems if..." lists, i thought there were a few missing descriptions of women in ems. This is a good-natured post, i'm not trying to offend anybody and some of these are obvious over-exaggerations, so please keep it light-hearted. So, without further ado: You might be a woman in ems if:
> 
> -you are more comfortable in bdu's/ uniform pants than slacks
> 
> ...



spot. On.


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## Rin (Aug 22, 2014)

You might be a woman in EMS if you can't be partnered with another woman without patients comparing you to Chicago Fire.


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## Beanie (Oct 3, 2014)

I'm not even in EMS yet, and a lot of those already apply.


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## Rin (Oct 3, 2014)

Beanie said:


> I'm not even in EMS yet, and a lot of those already apply.



My first thought was, " @beano is a woman?!"  Oh, wait...


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## Anjel (Oct 3, 2014)

Rin said:


> My first thought was, " @beano is a woman?!"  Oh, wait...



Lol I thought the same thing


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## Ewok Jerky (Oct 3, 2014)

haha. Guess its time to add an avatar.


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## emschick1985 (Dec 20, 2014)

Sage said:


> After reading the many "You might be in EMS if..." lists, I thought there were a few missing descriptions of women in EMS. This is a good-natured post, I'm not trying to offend anybody and some of these are obvious over-exaggerations, so please keep it light-hearted. So, without further ado: You might be a woman in EMS if:
> 
> -You are more comfortable in BDU's/ uniform pants than slacks
> 
> ...


You may be a female in EMS if miter nature sneaks up on you and you considered using an ABD pad in a pinch!!!


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## OKCEMT (Jan 7, 2015)

johnrsemt said:


> These are funny;
> Reminds me of when my partner and I were precepting a young, small lady:    She had to tell us (Chew us out) to let her lift one end of the cot, to prove that she could do it:   told us  "Stop being gentleman".   Then on the next run she had to tell us "one of you get the other end,  I can't do both"     oops


Sounds about right!


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## Calico (Jan 7, 2015)

-elderly male patients suddenly feel so much better when "a pretty young thing like you" is in the back with them while "your little boyfriend is driving."

-elderly female patients tell you (and your male partner) upon your leaving the hospital, "Now you two be good in the back of that ambulance."  And because she's deaf, the whole ED hears it.


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## sirengirl (Jan 31, 2015)

Your regular partner inherently knows What Time of the Month it is without being told, and doesn't question when you state you need to stop at a grocery store or pharmacy.


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