# I can't stand being a paramedic.



## Montbell (Jan 14, 2014)

I am anonymously requesting your feedback because I am unable to discuss this topic with any friends, family, or employees.

I recently graduated paramedic school and have been working with my current employer for less than seven months (we are an ambulance service on the outskirts of a big city with ~100 paramedics, ~5 calls in a 12hr shift). I did not work as an EMT prior to medic school. Even though medic school was very tough and frightening at times I enjoyed almost every minute of it. I was so happy to get hired at such a great service as a fresh medic and I LOVED coming to work for the first 6 months until one really terrible shift:

I was working with a veteran paramedic that I have never worked with before and the night was going great until I noticed that she was doing something VERY unsafe and I requested that she stop what she was doing (there was no patient in the ambulance). This person’s reaction was very unprofessional and we both were angry at each other for the rest of the night. 

Ever since this occurrence I am sickened with the idea of going back to work. Now I can’t stop thinking about all of the things that I hate about being a paramedic. For example:

---Driving emergently at 0300 while trying to decipher what is reality and what are remnants of my dreams.

---Pretending to feel sorry for a patient with COPD due to 60 years of smoking.

---Being unbelted in the back with a partner who thinks code-3 driving means that they should drive like they are in a rally race.

---Working an overnight shift one day then working a day shift the next and then getting called in at 1am to work a shift at 4am.

I can’t stand being a paramedic. *Is this just a phase that all new medics go through?* Because I went through a lot of work to get where I am and I am considering throwing it all away.


----------



## exodus (Jan 14, 2014)

1: Spend a minute waking yourself up, do a few quick push ups or 10 jumping jacks to get your blood going real quick. You can take a minute or two to wake up before responding.
2: Don't feel sorry for them, just don't be cold towards them. Treat them the way you would treat a family member that smoked for 60 years.
3: Then belt up, or tell them to go code 2.
4: You can say you're too tired to work. Companies will do this to new medics because they are eager and excited to get to go play.

Remember, when you are in the back, you are in charge of EVERYTHING. If you feel unsafe with your partners driving, make a paper trail and report it.


----------



## AceThunderstone (Jan 14, 2014)

It doesn't sound like you dislike being a medic, just that you don't like your company or your coworkers.

For your specific examples:

1. Take some extra time to wake up. You're patient isn't going to die because you took an extra minute. 

2. No one is asking you to feel sorry for them. Not sure where you got this idea. Treat them as best you can and don't be a **** and you'll have done your job.

3. If your partner won't change their driving style by talking to them directly, go to your supervisor or refuse to work with them. Also, buckle up.

4. That just sound like a bad company to work for. Are you required to come in whenever requested? If I even chose to answer the phone, I'd probably just say no or tell them I'd been drinking.


----------



## NomadicMedic (Jan 14, 2014)

Find a new place to work. It's not like that everywhere...


----------



## Tigger (Jan 14, 2014)

DEmedic said:


> Find a new place to work. It's not like that everywhere...



Yup. You don't need to come up with a million strategies for dealing with what basically amounts to other people's crap. Find a place where it doesn't exist as much. Obviously harder than it sounds, but not nearly as hard as many make it out to be. There are many discontents in EMS, and among them there are many unwilling (for a variety of reasons) to climb out of their hole and find a new beginning, if you will.

Don't be that person.


----------



## Montbell (Jan 14, 2014)

I really appreciate the feedback guys. It is hard for me to imagine other services being much different because I have been dealing with this craziness since graduation.


----------



## abckidsmom (Jan 14, 2014)

Montbell said:


> I really appreciate the feedback guys. It is hard for me to imagine other services being much different because I have been dealing with this craziness since graduation.



There is a certain amount of suck it up involved in the level of working together that we do, but it doesn't extend to safety issues.  Seriously, just never transport with lights again.  It doesn't really save time, and it's not worth it.

Look for a better agency.  If you're willing to relocate, we can recommend a ton of them.


----------



## Aprz (Jan 14, 2014)

Some of the issues you mentioned, you are in control of.

I would advise against working day AND night shifts. If you are working a 12 hour shift, there is no problem napping in between calls, but you shouldn't expect to sleep.

Even when there is a patient in the back, wear your seat belt. Take it off only when necessary.


----------



## unleashedfury (Jan 14, 2014)

Is this your permanent partner or was just the flavor of the day? 

Truth be told any job has it crappy parts, Its either embrace the suck or move on to somewhere different. 

to address your issues 

1. wake up, I keep a drink with me sometimes a quick swallow of something chilled wakes me up. If your posted step out of the rig and jog around it. If your at the base calisthenics as others suggest can get the blood flowing, Disruptions in sleep you get used to, My wife goes nuts cause when I am at work the pager or house alarm wakes me right up. When I am at home I'll hit the snooze about 5 times, As far as driving emergent at 3AM whos on the street that you need to run hot? 

2.  Theres a difference between empathy and feeling sorry for someone, I have empathy but feel sorry for no one, I treat my patients as I would want my aunt uncle brother sister mother or grandmother treated.

3. Belt up, secondly if you are treating the patient you are the paramedic in charge, If you feel your partner is driving unsafe you need to advise them of such actions

4. Welcome to EMS as a new candidate you will flip shifts and times and they know its frustrating but if you won't 50 other new candidates will eat up that job.


----------



## ZombieEMT (Jan 15, 2014)

I have to agree with the census, it does not seem that the issue is with being a paramedic, its with working for that particular company.

-Having a lack of interest in patients for some people becomes a way to deal with it. Just do your job and get through. Think of the reasons that you chose to become a paramedic. Remember not all people are perfect.
-On most calls, there is no reason to not have a seatbelt on. Belt up all the time, and only unbelt when needed. If the driver is being unsafe, address the issue. Do not let someone else deter you from being a paramedic.
-I think the change after the first six months is because you thought it was a great service and were excited for it to be your first job. I have been in the same situation. I took a job that I thought was good but then realized many negatives about that specific company, not necessarily the job. Once you realized the company wasnt perfect, you did not like as much in the first six months.


----------



## mgr22 (Jan 15, 2014)

Is it possible your disenchantment is mostly about that one unfavorable incident with your partner? I'm no expert, but you did say your negative feelings started at that point. Perhaps that incident is coloring your overall view of the job. If so, maybe you'd feel better if you talked about with the other person, or with a neutral party. Maybe you'll be relieved to find out the job itself is ok.


----------



## firetender (Jan 15, 2014)

I'm just wondering what's going on underneath it all. You state you loved every minute of school and loved the job for about six months and then you find yourself with one partner who is doing something "unsafe" and then you start running all these reasons why it's a sucky job and/or company and/or living.

 Why are you working so hard to talk yourself out of it?


----------



## Montbell (Jan 15, 2014)

firetender said:


> Why are you working so hard to talk yourself out of it?



I am trying to talk myself into staying a paramedic. If I leave now, there is no going back. I have hated jobs in the past or thought they were boring but never have I literally dreaded going to work like I do now. 

.



mgr22 said:


> Maybe you'd feel better if you talked about it with the other person, or with a neutral party.



Here is the full story: My partner was texting while driving the ambulance. When I tried talking to her she blew up on me and, I KID YOU NOT, said that I will never be a good paramedic if I can’t multitask like texting and driving. Again, I am the new guy so going and whining to the manager is the last thing I want to do because I will be known as the tattle-tale. I seriously believe that this devastated me and I am trying to understand how my passion for being a paramedic was flipped upside down so abruptly.


----------



## Montbell (Jan 15, 2014)

Aprz said:


> I would advise against working day AND night shifts.



I wish you were my scheduler. I am 1 of the 3 newest medics which means that I am stuck with all of the shifts that noone else wants. This is usually alternating day night shifts. This screws up my sleep pattern so bad. I don't remember the last time I got a good nights sleep. THIS IS THE EPITOME of why I am considering leaving. And there is no way of getting around this because Unleashedfury stated it perfectly:



unleashedfury said:


> 4. Welcome to EMS as a new candidate you will flip shifts and times and they know its frustrating but if you won't 50 other new candidates will eat up that job.


----------



## chaz90 (Jan 15, 2014)

Montbell said:


> I am trying to talk myself into staying a paramedic. If I leave now, there is no going back. I have hated jobs in the past or thought they were boring but never have I literally dreaded going to work like I do now.
> 
> .
> 
> ...



Why does your unpleasant interaction with an individual change how you feel about the entire career? I don't quite get where this one experience seems to have colored what you think being a paramedic is all about. There are plenty of people I meet in everyday life I don't get along with, but it doesn't mean I suddenly hate life.


----------



## STXmedic (Jan 15, 2014)

chaz90 said:


> Why does your unpleasant interaction with an individual change how you feel about the entire career? I don't quite get where this one experience seems to have colored what you think being a paramedic is all about. There are plenty of people I meet in everyday life I don't get along with, but it doesn't mean I suddenly hate life.



This. 

Hate your partner, cool. Big deal. Life goes on. Like Chaz said, if disliking my partner meant I would hate my profession, I would have quit a long time ago.

There are :censored::censored::censored::censored:ty people in all careers, and at every job you will ever work at for the rest of your life. If you can't learn how to deal with them, you're going to have a very long, stressful time ahead of you. This has absolutely _nothing_ to do with you being a paramedic, though.

It sounds like you work for a crappy system. Find a new one. I've never had to constantly switch days/nights like that. That would screw me up, too. Or just stick out the first year until you can bid for a good shift, with hopefully a better partner.

Regardless, all of your complaints so far seem to have little to do with being a paramedic. They all seem to be operational or interpersonal. Both of those can be remedied with some work from you, and not require a full career change. Again, if you absolutely hate where you work, look for a new employer and quit your current one.


----------



## Handsome Robb (Jan 15, 2014)

That's downright unsafe to flip shifts like that.

My first shift bid as a paramedic I was #42 of 42. I worked weekend graveyard but I still had a set schedule. Did they call me asking me to work OT all the time? Absolutely but you don't have to say yes. No matter what they tell you. 

I agree that it doesn't sound like the job but the company.

There are thousands of EMS agencies and IFT agencies out there. IFT isn't glamorous but it gets you experience to get in with the really good agencies.


----------



## Kevinf (Jan 15, 2014)

I don't know of a single agency that doesn't have a policy banning texting while driving. Those that do it usually have an inflated sense of their ability to multi-task as well, as they swerve in and out of their lane as they insist they aren't swerving. Report them.


----------



## unleashedfury (Jan 16, 2014)

Montbell said:


> I am trying to talk myself into staying a paramedic. If I leave now, there is no going back. I have hated jobs in the past or thought they were boring but never have I literally dreaded going to work like I do now.
> 
> .
> 
> ...



Theres a fine line that needs to be drawn. first off, Texting and driving is unsafe. You are in California correct? I know for a fact that they have a policy that states there is no texting and driving so she is breaking the law. 

Oh and multi-tasking is purely a myth. The brain can only concentrate on one thing at a time. Proven fact. So if your texting your focusing on what you are trying to say. if you are driving you are focusing on what you need to do. 

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-power-prime/201103/technology-myth-multitasking

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=95256794

Some reading material for the "multitaskers to read as they drive their cars, drink their coffee and talk on the phone"


----------



## OregonEMT (Jan 16, 2014)

I'm confused. You can't stand being a paramedic due to this one isolated incident? Or could it be that you can't stand the person that you work with? Can you give us a little more detail including specific aspects of working as a paramedic that has led you to "hate" your chosen profession. 

your partner texting while driving is not a very common isolated incident that leads to instant hate of a profession.


----------



## cspinebrah (Jan 16, 2014)

Welcome to the world of ems! <_<


----------



## Montbell (Jan 16, 2014)

OregonEMT said:


> I'm confused. You can't stand being a paramedic due to this one isolated incident? Or could it be that you can't stand the person that you work with? Can you give us a little more detail including specific aspects of working as a paramedic that has led you to "hate" your chosen profession.
> 
> your partner texting while driving is not a very common isolated incident that leads to instant hate of a profession.



I agree, and that is why I am here. If I get this upset when a partner freaks out on me what will happen to my view of this job (or even life) when I am unable to resuscitate my first pediatric arrest? 

I do not have a set partner. Since I pick up all of the unwanted shifts I have a totally different partner every shift.


----------



## Hunter (Jan 16, 2014)

Montbell said:


> I agree, and that is why I am here. If I get this upset when a partner freaks out on me what will happen to my view of this job (or even life) when I am unable to resuscitate my first pediatric arrest?
> 
> I do not have a set partner. Since I pick up all of the unwanted shifts I have a totally different partner every shift.



These things are all part of the job, from the partners who text and drive to having 3 cardiac arrests with 0 saves in one shift you deal with it, talk to your partner if she blows up on you like that then she's obviously unprofessional and shouldn't be given respect or the time of day, I'd talk to management if my partner was unwilling to cooperate. As for the code you don't bring back, do what you can, know that you can't save everyone and figure out a constructive way to release stress.


----------



## unleashedfury (Jan 17, 2014)

Montbell said:


> I agree, and that is why I am here. If I get this upset when a partner freaks out on me what will happen to my view of this job (or even life) when I am unable to resuscitate my first pediatric arrest?
> 
> I do not have a set partner. Since I pick up all of the unwanted shifts I have a totally different partner every shift.



Unfortunately a situation we all face, Cardiac arrest of all ages. Pre-hospital arrests are rarely successful. I know for a fact I have probably ran hundreds of cardiac arrests in my career. I got return of pulses on 5 as far as extubated and walking out of the hospital and living a productive life 

My first peds arrest freaked me too, I just took a step back and breathed deep and worked to the best of my ability, If your partner has a problem with that she is of the same level of certification I would gladly say if you don't like the way I do it. Your more than welcome to come over and be the lead tech on this call..


----------



## Handsome Robb (Jan 18, 2014)

The first pedi arrest wasn't he hard one. The last one I ran messed me up though.


----------



## unleashedfury (Jan 18, 2014)

Robb said:


> The first pedi arrest wasn't he hard one. The last one I ran messed me up though.



I think its harder for me now since I have kids.. cause you can relate to the family and the situation.


----------



## NomadicMedic (Jan 18, 2014)

I had a pedi code on Wednesday. The baby was a month younger than my 4 month old. It rocked me. :/


----------



## unleashedfury (Jan 18, 2014)

DEmedic said:


> I had a pedi code on Wednesday. The baby was a month younger than my 4 month old. It rocked me. :/



Caught that the other day, in the no topic thread. It does mess with you. My kids are older now 9 and 6 but it always hits home when I get a pediatric patient. The worst one for me was a CO poisoning that had a 8 and 6 yr old the 8 yr old was less responsive but the 6 yr old reminded me exactly of my son kinda happy go lucky. and rambunctious


----------



## TheLocalMedic (Jan 20, 2014)

Does anyone else get the sense that cumulative stress may be a big factor in the OP's life?  Granted, they haven't been in the field that long, but I have a hard time believing that one partner's behavior is responsible for the way they are feeling.  

Until recently, I hadn't given a lot of thought to the whole stress/PTSD aspect of the job.  I figured that we all had some really :censored::censored::censored::censored:ty experiences that we had to work through, and that was that.  I mean, I went through my own period of burnout through the years, and still have calls that haunt me to this day.  There were absolutely times that I dreaded going to work, and I can remember attributing that feeling to something that a coworker did or some other incident.  

But the more I reflect on my career, the more I realize that most of those burnout/dread moments are probably attributable to high-stress calls that I went through rather than what I was actually blaming as the cause.  My wife has become fairly adept a seeking out the source of my psychological unease over the years, and I am learning that it can take weeks, months or sometimes even years for my stress to manifest.  Perhaps the stress of being in a new career where we routinely see people on the worst day of their lives is affecting the OP?  Maybe their partner's behavior was the so-called "last straw" that finally punched their stress button.


----------



## Leprechaun (Feb 5, 2014)

It sounds like like you are experiencing a reaction to stress. This is a stressful profession, not only because of the things we see and deal with, but also because of the hours, shifts, random work patterns, sleep depravation, etc. etc.. We all have worked with that person you had the driving issue with, but don't let that affect you or your dedication to work. There are unprofessional and rude people in every job. 
I doubt your patient care skills have been affected but your empathy towards some has been. That's completely normal. We all see the patients that have caused their own medical issues through years of excess and we have all picked up the drunk that really doesn't need an ambulance and will ring again tomorrow and the next day and so on. I will be the first to admit that I have looked at some of these patients as a waste of my time but it never affected my treatment of them. It's part of the job and in time you'll accept that we not only treat acute cases if illness and injury but we see loads of social cases also. 
Don't let these incidents cloud what drove you to become a paramedic.


----------



## mycrofft (Feb 5, 2014)

OP, a few hipshots:

Hard as it sounds, you must be able to disengage your emotions. If you were at BurgerKink, you wouldn't feel angry selling a burger to a heavy person. That's part of professionalism and doing what you are paid for. Besides, impartiality is implicit in what health care providers do. Don't identify with patients, don't judge them against either you aspirations or fears.

Your co-worker (NOT a "partner", by far!) needs to have another co-worker. Like maybe one of the managers. Just tell them you request not to be scheduled with that person anymore, don't drop the dime on what's happening unless it can be done anonymously or it seems to be a good idea to you (such as if that person begins to make your "workplace hostile", hint hint).

Ask if "bottom scraping" (getting all the leftover shifts and doubling-back a lot) is part of getting into the staffing rotation or is it part of life there. If it's for newbies, ask how long it usually lasts, then mark your calendar.

PS: enlist your boss as a mentor, or get your boss to suggest one.

With 100 employees, that is a wide expanse of control for presumably one or two managers. Nonetheless, start to look around especially as you accrue more experience so if another company gets your attention, go for it with no hard feelings, not waiting for a crash (literally).


----------



## emschick1985 (Dec 20, 2014)

Montbell said:


> I am anonymously requesting your feedback because I am unable to discuss this topic with any friends, family, or employees.
> 
> I recently graduated paramedic school and have been working with my current employer for less than seven months (we are an ambulance service on the outskirts of a big city with ~100 paramedics, ~5 calls in a 12hr shift). I did not work as an EMT prior to medic school. Even though medic school was very tough and frightening at times I enjoyed almost every minute of it. I was so happy to get hired at such a great service as a fresh medic and I LOVED coming to work for the first 6 months until one really terrible shift:
> 
> ...


No this usually sets in after a year or so. If you are feeling this way already, get out now!!!! I am at 4.5 years and actually have an exit plan now and I couldn't be happier about it!!


----------



## teedubbyaw (Dec 20, 2014)

emschick1985 said:


> No this usually sets in after a year or so. If you are feeling this way already, get out now!!!! I am at 4.5 years and actually have an exit plan now and I couldn't be happier about it!!



Please check dates of thread before replying.


----------



## planetmike (Dec 21, 2014)

teedubbyaw said:


> Please check dates of thread before replying.


I don’t get why people get so torqued about people replying on-topic to old threads. If a new reply goes off-topic, that’s bad. And yes, teedubbyaw and I have gone off-topic. See http://emtlife.com/threads/suggsted-addition-to-community-rules.38463/ for a discussion of posting on old posts.


----------



## MonkeyArrow (Dec 22, 2014)

planetmike said:


> I don’t get why people get so torqued about people replying on-topic to old threads. If a new reply goes off-topic, that’s bad. And yes, teedubbyaw and I have gone off-topic. See http://emtlife.com/threads/suggsted-addition-to-community-rules.38463/ for a discussion of posting on old posts.


You and I have both responded to the thread you linked and there is no general consensus, as seen by the wide array of answers.


----------



## Meursault (Dec 22, 2014)

OregonEMT said:


> your partner texting while driving is not a very common isolated incident that leads to instant hate of a profession.


Having gone through something similar, as a new employee, your first big argument with a partner can be the moment when the bottom drops out and you realize you're working in a toxic culture: no one cares about your safety concerns, no one's there to advocate for you, and all management sees is two employees arguing, one senior and one new.

That will make you hate your job almost instantly. The solution is to find a new company quickly (without quitting), or if you won't do that, find a new partner _immediately_.


----------



## Angel (Dec 23, 2014)

OP hasn't  been around since jan...a year almost....just throwing that out there


----------



## Tigger (Dec 23, 2014)

MonkeyArrow said:


> You and I have both responded to the thread you linked and there is no general consensus, as seen by the wide array of answers.



The consensus of the Community Leaders is that if people wish to make on topic responses to old threads, they are free to do so.


----------



## Ewok Jerky (Dec 23, 2014)

I just wonder how people even find these threads.


----------



## PotatoMedic (Dec 23, 2014)

beano said:


> I just wonder how people even find these threads.


The search function.  Another tool we berate people for not using.


----------



## Ewok Jerky (Dec 23, 2014)

FireWA1 said:


> The search function.  Another tool we berate people for not using.



I'm fully aware of the dichotomy, and I supposupthe search funtion... But who searches for "can't stand being a paramedic"?


----------



## Chimpie (Dec 23, 2014)

... Or they just start going through the lists of threads in a category. Either way, we allow people to respond to old topics as long as their posts are relevant. No additional commentary is necessary.


----------

