# Pocket Taser Stun Gun



## emt_angel25 (May 30, 2009)

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary submitted this:

Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my  interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The effects of the taser were supposed  to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing  her adequate time to retreat to safety....??

WAY TOO COOL!   Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home.  I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button.  Nothing!  I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.

AWESOME!!!   Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-A batteries, right?

There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target.

I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and taser in another.  The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water.  Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.  All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5" 
long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference;  pretty cute really and (loaded with two itsy, bitsy triple-A batteries) thinking to myself,  'no possible way!'

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best...?

I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as to say, 'don't do it dip:censored::censored::censored::censored:,' reasoning that a one second burst from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad.  I decided to give myself a one second burst just for heck of it.  I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and . . . HOLY MOTHER OF GOD . .. . WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION . .   WHAT THE HELL!!!

I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again.  I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs?

The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.

Note: If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a taser,one note of caution: there is no such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself!  You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor.  A three second burst would be considered conservative?

SON-OF-A-:censored::censored::censored::censored::censored:, THAT HURT LIKE HELL!!!

A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape.  My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace.  The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or so from where it originally was.  My  triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching.  My face felt like it  had been shot up with Novocaine, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs.  I had no control over the drooling.  Apparently I :censored::censored::censored::censored: myself, but was too numb to know for sure and my sense of smell was gone.  I saw a faint smoke cloud above my head which I believe came from my hair. I'm still
 looking for my nuts and I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return!!

P. S. My wife loved the gift, and now regularly threatens me with it!


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## fortsmithman (May 30, 2009)

Rofl


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## Shishkabob (May 30, 2009)

Is it a Taser or is it a stun gun?


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## VFFforpeople (May 30, 2009)

I would have hit the cat...See how many public assist calls I get to help a cat out of a tree after I do that to one! HAHAHA


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## fortsmithman (May 31, 2009)

Linuss said:


> Is it a Taser or is it a stun gun?



It was in all probability a stun gun.


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## blterry (Jun 1, 2009)

*Taser vs. Stun gun*



fortsmithman said:


> It was in all probability a stun gun.



I would also say it is a Stun gun not a taser which are around $250 dollars and not something you get from a pawn shop


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## fortsmithman (Jun 1, 2009)

Linuss said:


> Is it a Taser or is it a stun gun?





blterry said:


> I would also say it is a Stun gun not a taser which are around $250 dollars and not something you get from a pawn shop



Finally other people who know the difference between a TASER and stun gun.  It seems that a lot of people mistakenly call stun guns TASER.


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## blterry (Jun 2, 2009)

fortsmithman said:


> Finally other people who know the difference between a TASER and stun gun.  It seems that a lot of people mistakenly call stun guns TASER.



for the people who dont know the difference:

a stun gun shocks people close up, usually less than $100

a taser shots two prongs so you can use it longer distances and its got the stun gun part too so you can use it close up also, costs around $250 and you have to activate it and go through a background check


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## Shishkabob (Jun 3, 2009)

It's just a pet peeve of mine, like people saying "clips" instead of "magazines".


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## lightsandsirens5 (Jun 4, 2009)

Linuss said:


> It's just a pet peeve of mine, like people saying "clips" instead of "magazines".




But Linuss, the clip goes inside the magazine....................if you are loading that way.

Well kind of. I do s'pose the clip stays outside of the mag, but it is close enough. Do you shoot alot?


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## willbeflight (Jun 24, 2009)

fortsmithman said:


> Finally other people who know the difference between a TASER and stun gun.  It seems that a lot of people mistakenly call stun guns TASER.



I just bought a 950,000 volt taser!  I won't be testing it on myself or the microwave.  lol  :unsure:


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## Sasha (Jun 24, 2009)

willbeflight said:


> I just bought a 950,000 volt taser!  I won't be testing it on myself or the microwave.  lol  :unsure:



I never thought to test the taser thingie my ex boyfriend bought me.... I just assumed that it works.


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## fortsmithman (Jun 24, 2009)

willbeflight said:


> I just bought a 950,000 volt taser!  I won't be testing it on myself or the microwave.  lol  :unsure:



Is it a TASER or stun gun.  Did you undergo a background check by TASER.  TASER's once purchased can only be activated with a PIN you get from TASER one the background check comes back as satisfactory.  In order for LEO's to be authorized to carry a TASER they have to be TASERed as well.  It's the same for LEOs and pepper spray.


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## Sasha (Jun 24, 2009)

fortsmithman said:


> Is it a TASER or stun gun.  Did you undergo a background check by TASER.  TASER's once purchased can only be activated with a PIN you get from TASER one the background check comes back as satisfactory.  In order for LEO's to be authorized to carry a TASER they have to be TASERed as well.  It's the same for LEOs and pepper spray.



Jesus, it's semantics.


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## fortsmithman (Jun 24, 2009)

Sasha said:


> Jesus, it's semantics.



I know it's semantics and I'm not Jesus.


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## imhumanoid (Jun 29, 2009)

To funny ^_^


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## blterry (Jun 29, 2009)

no its just crazy that people do not know the difference between a stun gun and a taser


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## willbeflight (Jun 29, 2009)

fortsmithman said:


> Is it a TASER or stun gun.  Did you undergo a background check by TASER.  TASER's once purchased can only be activated with a PIN you get from TASER one the background check comes back as satisfactory.  In order for LEO's to be authorized to carry a TASER they have to be TASERed as well.  It's the same for LEOs and pepper spray.




Ok, here in NC, you don't have to go through all of that stuff.  It is a TASER.  Says so right on the label!! And I called the cops just to make suer I didn't have to do anything and they said I was good to go.


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## billyhurd (Jun 29, 2009)

*Ha, Ha*

Freaking hilarious.  I'll be sharing this post with my wife.


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## Sasha (Jun 29, 2009)

blterry said:


> no its just crazy that people do not know the difference between a stun gun and a taser



Most people don't care. It fits in my purse and goes ZAP. I'm happy.


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## willbeflight (Jun 29, 2009)

Sasha said:


> Most people don't care. It fits in my purse and goes ZAP. I'm happy.



I hear ya!


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## Hopeless Romantic (Jul 1, 2009)

Bear in mind, you also weren't in a fight when you did this to yourself. Your adrenaline wasn't pumping, and you weren't really a moving target. So I'm not really sure how effective this really would be.

I'm not a big proponent of investing in items like these. It plays on peoples fears and makes them feel safer then they really are. Though, this was quite funny none the less. Next time, call someone else over when you feel like testing something out


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## *EMT-n-training* (Aug 28, 2009)

sad to say but i have seen a friend of mine use a stun gun on himself with the reasoning "im sure it doesnt hurt that bad" needless to say , it did lol


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## ethorp (Aug 29, 2009)

Sasha said:


> Most people don't care. It fits in my purse and goes ZAP. I'm happy.



ever checked if it still has a charge cause they can go bad


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## RescueYou (Aug 30, 2009)

Hahahaha rofl


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## KillTank (Aug 30, 2009)

Linuss said:


> It's just a pet peeve of mine, like people saying "clips" instead of "magazines".



Yes I agree!

I had a pocket stun gun. 750,000 volts of awesomeness. But I gave it to my girlfriend. I figure my 9mm with eagle talons would cause more damage ^_^


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## anezay2004 (Aug 30, 2009)

*Haha*

Lol thats great


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## EMT-G36C (Sep 7, 2009)

Linuss said:


> It's just a pet peeve of mine, like people saying "clips" instead of "magazines".


:excl::excl::excl::excl::excl::excl:


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## Delando (Sep 15, 2009)

EMT-G36C said:


> :excl::excl::excl::excl::excl::excl:



Unless your talking about a M-1 or some old WWII piece.

But anyho, I personally get her a peper spay. Safer. less fun, but safer. 

Speaking of fun, have yall seen thess knuckle duster/tasers?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PeJ8VgCvy4Q&feature=related

Watch 1:50 min and 3:01 min.


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