# Weird and Funny Calls over the Radio



## aussieemt1980 (May 27, 2008)

I am sure that we have all heard something weird and funny over the radio, so lets share it with everyone...

I will kick start it:

While working dispatch, call came over the radio for backup for a patient with a spinal injury. When asked the condition of the patient, came the reply "I don't know, they are still walking over to me..."

Request for transport for a patient who was suffering from hypothermia (note HYPO) with an unusually HIGH temperature...

Urgent request for resources for a major incident - needed more milk for the coffee...

When calling a specific call sign (star light), came the reply from another unit - I dont see star light, but the moon is very bright...

Request for a sanity check...


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## mikeylikesit (May 27, 2008)

we had a call come in like this.
"witness states that homo is having trouble with his back"
Homo was the short abbreviation that dispatch used for home owner.^_^


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## aussieemt1980 (May 27, 2008)

mikeylikesit said:


> we had a call come in like this.
> "witness states that homo is having trouble with his back"
> Homo was the short abbreviation that dispatch used for home owner.^_^



roflmao, lol


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## CPG (May 27, 2008)

*Lol-----*

ON my clinicial ride time, we responded to a  84 yof at a flea merket.

Why she was buying flea's is another story.....

She got light headed and called us......claims it has never happened before, ever.  Like NNNEEEVVVEERRR!

them she adds...."this has never happpened, unless you count the time at the grocery store a month ago......"


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## Grady_emt (May 28, 2008)

Once got a refusal on a pt with diarrhea.  Went in service "242 radio, inservice on a refusal, pt advises she's just gonna _run _with it":unsure:   Had to change dispatchers 3 times before one came on that wasnt lauging.

Have this one psych pt who will walk up to us at post and request a ride to the ER.  When prompted for a complaint "I think im gonna have a siezure tomorrow, or maybe the next day"  So told radio to hold us out on a walk-up pt, c/o "future siezure".  The dispatcher asked me how i wanted to code the call in the CAD.   So I told her "radio, the patient thinks that he might have a siezure tomorrow or the next day, hasnt had one yet though.  Just code it as a signal 24(psych pt) until he actually has a siezure, then you can change it to an active siezure"



My recent favorite came in this past weekend.  Insurrection is an Atlanta...ahem...adult item store.  

"7218, Emergency response, person down 3rd party, pt will be inside Insurrection, caller advises to enter from the rear"


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## mikeylikesit (May 28, 2008)

LOL sweet.


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## LucidResq (May 28, 2008)

Some stupid transmissions from the world of search and rescue: 

base: "Attention all units: it kinda looks like it's going to rain"
As we're out in the middle of nowhere in the pouring rain, holding a tarp over our victim. 


While we're in the middle of carrying out a "victim" down the side of the mountain during a training, this went down-

base: "Rescue leader, training base" 
me: "Go ahead" 
base: "Make sure you take good care of the victim." 

... Actually, I was planning on completely neglecting them. Thanks for reminding me.


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## BossyCow (May 28, 2008)

We got toned out to 37 yo male with partial amputation of thumb by power saw. We're enroute, dispatch comes on, Cancel, party will go to ED POV. We are now 1 block from the guys house. We verify the cancel, and Dispatch confirms call is cancelled, pt will drive self to ED. 

We immediately get toned out to an MVA. Car vs Pickup Truck pulling horse trailer. Multi system trauma, 5 patients, driver of car ended up airlifted to trauma center, horses all over the road. The Highway is shut down completely for about an hour. 

We're about 3 minutes into the MVA and dispatch comes on...thumb guy is back at his house and wants to know where we are. He changed his mind, went back home and called 911 again.


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## mikeylikesit (May 28, 2008)

but you did drop that silly MVA and went and helped the id10t with the half thumb right?^_^


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## mdkemt (May 28, 2008)

mikeylikesit said:


> but you did drop that silly MVA and went and helped the id10t with the half thumb right?^_^



Okay now that is awsome!  I totally would have went to the thumb guy! NOT!!!

Dispatch: 1504 to md
1504: go ahead
Dispatch: Respond bravo intown call
1504: 10-4 were 10-8
Dispatch: 1504 your responding for a unkown sex unknown age person standing in a field
1504: 10-9
Dispatch: unkown sex unknown age person standing in a field are you familiar with this location
1504: negative code 9 notified
Dispatch: 10-4 came in from code 9 they said go south
We did adventually find out FF psych patient!

Dispatch: 1204 your responding for a male pt c/o chest pain
*ok no biggy standard call*
1204: 10-4 were 10-8
Dispatch: 1204 do you have an ETA
*1min 27 secs after getting the call and the call was 20 mins out as an alpha*
1204: 6mins
Dispatch: 10-4
*2mins later*
Dispatch: 1204 to md
1204: go ahead
Dispatch: Pt states will meet you walking on the highway.  Pt left residence!

hmmmmmmmmmm chest pain???  Everything was fine in the end and the patient was found walking on the highway.:glare:


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## Jeremy89 (May 28, 2008)

I was listening to the scanner once and heard the following:

Dispatch: AP 221
AP: Go for Ap221
Dispatch: AP 221, respond to Scottsdale Senior care, address..., for immediate pt transport of ALOC Pt.
AP: Copy, AP221, do you have the destination address?
Dispatch: affirmative, transporting pt to Desert (meaning Banner Desert Hospital)
AP: Ma'am, we ARE in the Desert
Dispatch: *laughing so hard she could barely speak*  Ok AP221, that would be BANNER Desert Hospital [states address]

It wasn't that funny, but I guess the dispatcher thought it was.


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## EMTBandit (May 29, 2008)

We were sitting in our squad building and the scanner was on. We heard two of our officers get dispatched for a domestic at one of the apartment buildings and one of the officers in the background didn't realize he was talking too loud. ^_^

Dispatcher: Quarters to 8 and 4, respond to E. Passaic Apt. Bravo on the domestic, caller states *Not those two f**king a**holes again!!!* he was hit by friend.

Not mention everyone sitting in our squad room started to burst out laughing.


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## Jon (May 29, 2008)

EMT... I think everyplace has a few of them.

One I head recently:
Dispatch: Rescue __, _____ street, assist medics on location, for a subject WEDGED in the bathroom.


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## jordanfstop (May 29, 2008)

"(Dispatch) to (Ambulance unit) and (Medic unit) respond to 400 Main St for the intox, he's quite a mess right now."


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## firecoins (May 29, 2008)

PD got sent to someone in monkey outfit jumping in and out if traffic.


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## laina66 (May 29, 2008)

My chief...now ex-chief also worked in the university police station.
One night we were sitting in the bunkroom and over the radio we hear 
"CHIEF SAYS BACK THAT THANG UP!"
confused, my captain goes on air and says "I'm sorry...can you repeat?"

laughing hysterically, my chief comes back on air and says "disregard, please call the station."

she wanted to know why we were taking the truck all over the place. Oh boy.

Another best-- someone got a hold of a radio somehow...and in the middle of dinner we hear "SHOW ME YOUR TITTAYS!"
WHAT!


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## EMTBandit (May 29, 2008)

Another one I just thought of. At around 12 or 1 Am our PD got dispatched to someone laying in the middle of the road who was trying to get a "moon-tan".

Dispatch: Car 4 and 3, go check out a possible deer running around the middle of the road.
Car 4: A doe?
Car 3: A deer?
Car 4: A female deer?


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## mikeylikesit (May 30, 2008)

laina66 said:


> Another best-- someone got a hold of a radio somehow...and in the middle of dinner we hear "SHOW ME YOUR TITTAYS!"
> WHAT!



ahahahaha ROFLMAO........classic.


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## johnrsemt (May 30, 2008)

dispatched from a 911 service for a visually impaired pt walking along a major road with a dog.    got a good laugh on the was,  especially about the fact that we would have to take his seeing eye dog to the ER also.

  got there and pt was sitting in a chair;   dog was not a seeing eye dog,  but pt was legally blind and drunk and had complaint of:  sore feet (walked about 6 miles); and would get upset everytime we mentioned taking him to the ED but not the dog.

   so we took both;    I used cell phone to call ED with report,  couldn't promise I wouldn't lose it on the radio.  report that I was bringing legally blind  pt with sore feet, + ETOh and fake seeing eye dog for eval.
   when we got him to the ED, we were there less than 5 min, when a nurse told me that she didn't believe it was a real seeing eye dog;


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## Jeremy89 (Jun 3, 2008)

Just heard one about ten minutes ago on the scanner:

AP: *radio playing in the background (Linkin Park i think)*
Dispatch: AP 232 you have an open mic..please don't play the radio over the com.
AP: *Continues playing radio, then stops*

After a few calls I heard:

Dispatch: AP 232 please call HQ
Other AP:  (in Scooby doo voice) ruh-roh
Different AP:  oooohhhh
3rd AP:  Someone's in trouble
Dispatch:  (really pissed by now) Guys, please conduct yourselves as professionals on the radio.

It was quiet except for the necessary "copy", etc

Kinda funny but whatever.


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## mikeylikesit (Jun 4, 2008)

My partner and i got back from a call last night late. when we climbed into the truck my partner sat on the mic (which he threw on the seat on scene and this is what transpired.

My partner:so what do you think of the new dispatch lady.
Me:shes nice kinda of mother like though as far as an attitude.
My Partner: really...i think she's kind of a BI#$H.
Dispatch: Mic check all units
My partner:uhhhh......(click)

Yeah he caught some crap today from the supervisor and had to apologies to the dispatch lady...i still think that were probably gonna be doing transports for the whole rest of the week.


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## fma08 (Jun 20, 2008)

(address will be made up) but however call came in from our regional dispatch to 1321 Prairie Park Lane for a (insert random age here) lady with N/V and diarrhea for the day feeling dehydrated. When dispatch confirmed the address over the radio she stated it was "1321 Diarrhea.... i mean Prairie Park...etc funny as hell to hear. We could hear the other dispatchers laughing hysterically in the background.


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## mycrofft (Jun 20, 2008)

*There we were...Lincoln Nebraska...1980...*

Mednet comes on, man's voice says "10-10-10, Rescue and Engine One to 9such and such address), man down, not breathing".

We all cluster 'round, because, a., this isn't a voice we know, b., we don't know this address (one guy's scanning two maps feverishly), and c., if it is for us, we want to beat the FD there because they had a habit of hyperinflating stomachs, declaring victory and driving off. We're slowly going ape doo doo when we hear a unit 10-4 as "Lewis and Clark Engine One 10-8".
(What was that? What county?!).
"Helena Fire copies".
I'm chuckling. That turned out to be the first of many horrendous nights of "skip" radio; we were picking up Helena Montana as though it were next door, and could barely read our units across town. (That summer we went on to receive transmissions from the Florida Highway Patrol and a Spanish language transmission we dubbed "Tijuana Meds").


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## himynameismj (Jul 7, 2008)

The other day, we got a call to a location that they didn't bother to mention was a Dialysis center.

All of a sudden, one of the cops comes over the radio and goes:

"Hey, we just got here. The patient seems pale and oh crap - - wait - - uh oh - - yeah - - yeah, we got some bleeding from an unknown orifice. Hold on, I'm going in for a closer look. Yeah - - I have no idea where this is coming from. ETA?"

:glare: Those tricky ones.


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## Turner (Jul 7, 2008)

Dispatch: Found missing ambulance.   

Good stuff. Don't know what happen but that came over the radio one day.


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## Scout (Jul 7, 2008)

Turner said:


> Dispatch: Found missing ambulance.
> 
> Good stuff. Don't know what happen but that came over the radio one day.



That happen every time you come back form a quiet shift?


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## Turner (Jul 7, 2008)

We had a Call and we just heard it over the radio. It never happens in NJ.


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## Medic9 (Jul 7, 2008)

mikeylikesit said:


> My partner and i got back from a call last night late. when we climbed into the truck my partner sat on the mic (which he threw on the seat on scene and this is what transpired.
> 
> My partner:so what do you think of the new dispatch lady.
> Me:shes nice kinda of mother like though as far as an attitude.
> ...




Now thats FUNNY!


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## mikeylikesit (Jul 8, 2008)

Oh that reminds me...i have been dispatched to:
a sperm bank once
a porn store 4 times
a strip club
all sorts of fun stuff.


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## fma08 (Jul 8, 2008)

scanning the police channels while on a standby for a suicidal pt.

Dispatch: Edward 311, assist at 123 C street, suicidal and combative person.
Edward 311: 10-4, can I get some help with the location of C street?
Dispatch: 10-4, it's between B and D streets


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## gradygirl (Jul 9, 2008)

My partner and I were posted when we heard this call go out to another unit.

Dispatch: Unit 9XX.
9XX: Go ahead.
Dispatch: Unit 9XX, priority 1 to XYZ for the child not breathing.
9XX: 10-4.
{Insert about 3 min.}
9XX: We're out, looking.
Dispatch: 10-4.
{Insert about 30 seconds.}
9XX: Ummm, dispatch, could you please confirm our call information?
Dispatch: Ummm, XYZ for the child not breathing. Why?
9XX: Well, it looks like our patient is going to be a DOG not breathing, not a child.
{All we heard after that was dispatch click the mic, the decide not to say anything for about a minute, when they released the unit from the call. Needless to say, no one from dispatch or the crew could talk without laughing.}


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## BLSBoy (Jul 14, 2008)

I won't tell you about mine. 
I'll let you listen..

http://www.soundupload.com/audio/7mrbiko2ul8mncfi


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## Kate-Lynn (Jul 14, 2008)

I found this a few weeks ago somehow - http://www.radioreference.com/forums/archive/index.php/t-36654-p-1.html
They're mostly police/fire but they're funny nonetheless. I pathetically read all 11 pages. lol.


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## poppawilly (Jul 17, 2008)

here is a funny one.  i was dispatching one night for our local fire/ems dept when a call came in for a structure fire at approx 0300hrs.  so i do a group page and tell them "attention all ****** firefighters, we need you to 10-22 to the station for a structure fire. 
 and to think i have been a firefighter since 2003.  LOL


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## MedicPrincess (Jul 17, 2008)

Okay... last shift..

"Med 2, Engine 41 your responding to a 27 year old F patient who is complaining of being punched in her face and now her knee is bleeding."  :wacko::wacko::wacko:


Ummmm....  How hard to you have to punch someone in the face for the force to be transferred to the knee and make it bleed?????


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## Tiberius (Jul 28, 2008)

...I heard this one over the radio to another unit a few years ago (I'm paraphrasing):

"....respond to **** for the 40 y/o male complaining to burns to his back secondary to his wife ironing his shirt while he was wearing it..."


I coundn't even make that up on my worst day!


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## Bosco578 (Jul 28, 2008)

MVC - First in crew calls dispatch for a second unit : Update from dispatch, "Alpha-xyz requesting second unit hot for an unconscious male ejaculated from vehicle".......Hmmmmm

Crew calls for a second EMS unit for a working code - "Dispatch send us another truck piping hot" - Now that's a hot response


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