# Funnt Stories



## Jayxbird521 (Mar 20, 2008)

IK this has nothing to do with what ur posting but i rember not to long ago i was sitting at wrk new yrs eve we were getting slamed with calls that night along with every other ems/fire crews in the us we were just clearning the call when the dispacher alerted us of an emotional disssorder at the local city pd station we went respondoing it was abought 4 mins till we got on the scene i grab the 1st in bag and tell the driver to bring the streacher to the front door i also had a jr aide with me we go to the front desk and they point and say cell block A we get in there to find a 27yo fm Naked so i asked the cop why is she all naked and he sead becase she keep trying to hang her self so we striped her down i started chuckleing right as we walk in the lady came running after me full force and smack she came at me so hard i thought i got tackeled by emit smith ha when i got my barings every one was trying to calm this lady down we finaly get her on the streacher we almost got her in the ambulance and smack i relli thought i got hit by mike tyson all along this lady was beating the C R A P out of me mind you she was like 5'2 175 i was all embarissed the got her in the ambulance and i was trying to suck in all the pain on of the cops look at me and says witch one of u needs to go to th hospital i laghuf and get in2 the ambulance and find my EMT student and my EMT/DRIVER try to strap this lady in still the driver tryed to get her to lay back and was holding her head when smack he gets head butted and his nose started to bleed so i tell him to go up front right away and go lights/sirens hard to the hosptal finaly my emt student screams at the top of her lungs at first i thought i was going crazy but she sead i can scream louder now are you gona let us be in charge nd she all of a sudden stoped and sead well if u say so she sead ru gona stop hiting john becase i think he is very good looking do u want him to stay that way she sead yea and looked at me and sead ur safe cuz ur hot when we get to the hospital she didnt give us any trouble but right as i get out off the ambulance i triped and fell flat on my face and started bleeding from the head we walked in the two grown me on with a nose bleed and the other bleeding from the head and an emt jr untouched the nurse who i was good friends with sead u like it ruff dont ya john i laguhfed ha thought this would give u guys a good laghuf


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## ffemt8978 (Mar 20, 2008)

Can you please try to repost this using at least a token effort of correct spelling, grammar, and punctuation?

The way it is posted now is way to difficult for me to even attempt to read.

Thank you.


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## JPINFV (Mar 20, 2008)

Periods, paragraphs, and full words would be nice. We aren't your BFF Jill. Don't make me post that video from the competition at the end of Billy Madison.


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## Jayxbird521 (Mar 20, 2008)

Sorry Never Finished HS Thats Why I Am an EMT


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## Jayxbird521 (Mar 20, 2008)

plusssssssssss iv beeeeeeeennn wrking for 24 hours so im kinda tired


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## MedicPrincess (Mar 20, 2008)

Jayxbird521 said:


> Sorry Never Finished HS Thats Why I Am an EMT


 

OK, see I am pretty offended by this statement!  

As for not being able to punctuate, I have a 9 year old that is familiar with proper punctuation and grammar.  

If all else fails, any word processing program on a computer has a spell check in it.  Please try typing your posts there, running the spelling/grammar check, then copy and paste into your post.  

This will allow for you posts to be read and responded to.  You will also be a more successful, productive contributing member.


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## Outbac1 (Mar 20, 2008)

Jayxbird521

 I know many people have not finished high school for a variety of reasons. Please do not take offense that I suggest you check with a community college to see what programs they may have to help people read and write better. From trying to read your posts I believe you could benefit from one. I know it would help you become a more productive participant of the EMTLIFE community. 

 I'm sure you, your partner and pt looked quite a sight on your arrival at hospital.


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## KEVD18 (Mar 20, 2008)

i quit reading about line 2


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## EMTgurl911 (Mar 21, 2008)

Ok I don't even understand what you said...:glare:


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## JPINFV (Mar 21, 2008)

MedicPrincess said:


> OK, see I am pretty offended by this statement!


Why?
[insert comment, based on another thread, about people who think writing a 3 word "No patient found" hard here]

Obviously EMS provider's priorities are on shiny woo woos for their POV and doing as little work as necessary. If people put as much work as they did on pimping out their POV and avoiding work into lobbying for better pay and improving their education, then maybe EMS wouldn't be in the mess it currently is in.


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## ffemt8978 (Mar 21, 2008)

JPINFV said:


> Why?
> [insert comment, based on another thread, about people who think writing a 3 word "No patient found" hard here]
> 
> Obviously EMS provider's priorities are on shiny woo woos for their POV and doing as little work as necessary. If people put as much work as they did on pimping out their POV and avoiding work into lobbying for better pay and improving their education, then maybe EMS wouldn't be in the mess it currently is in.



What does this have to do with this thread?


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## JPINFV (Mar 21, 2008)

We're talking about people's [in]ability to coherently string together words into meaningful sentences and string meaningful sentences into coherent paragraphs. If you (generic "you") fail at, or find excruciatingly hard, stringing words into sentences [such as 'No patient [was] found'], then you will fail at stringing sentences into paragraphs. 

This ties in with the original poster's hatred of his/her enter and period keys. The fact that so many other people in EMS [definitely not limited to any online EMS message board service] have trouble with the basic tenets of the English language does point to EMS being full of people who can't write at a high school level. This is what Medic Princess finds insulting, but it is, in large part, an unfortunate truth.


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## BossyCow (Mar 21, 2008)

JPINFV said:


> We're talking about people's [in]ability to coherently string together words into meaningful sentences and string meaningful sentences into coherent paragraphs. If you (generic "you") fail at, or find excruciatingly hard, stringing words into sentences [such as 'No patient [was] found'], then you will fail at stringing sentences into paragraphs.
> 
> This ties in with the original poster's hatred of his/her enter and period keys. The fact that so many other people in EMS [definitely not limited to any online EMS message board service] have trouble with the basic tenets of the English language does point to EMS being full of people who can't write at a high school level. This is what Medic Princess finds insulting, but it is, in large part, an unfortunate truth.



Yeah.. I didn't see anything in her post about having a POV with shiny woo-woos. And one bad poster doesn't equate into EMS being 'full of' anything. It would be nice JPINFV to have a post from you that didn't pour gasoline on the EMT wars. 

I am an EMT-B. I am also a professional. I write reports for a living. While EMS is not my day job, I carry the professionalism I use in my day job into my work in EMS. I'm sorry that your experience has been negative. Please do not extrapolate that into global assessments of EMS as a whole. 

Every so often we get someone who doesn't feel the need to use all the rules of grammar. There are many who are spelling/challenged. The posts up until yours have been related to this poster and this post. It may be correct to say she is uneducated but not that her post means EMS is full of the uneducated. It may be correct to flame her specific post, but not to use her as a reason to vent your spleen about all EMS everywhere. 

I think you need to spend some time listening to soft music with a puppy and some lavender oil. You seem stressed.


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## TheMowingMonk (Mar 21, 2008)

i just don't like the implication there that most EMT's are stupid. Im a high school grad and a current college student. I would like to think that im an intelligent EMT along with the rest of my coworkers.


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## certguy (Mar 21, 2008)

Okay guys , 
   Simmer down , though we're all supposed to be one family , there are boneheads out there who live to put down EMT's . Try not to get offended . We should feel sorry for those who have the need to put others down to make themselves feel good and look for every opportunity they can find to open up old wounds . This is amazingly counterproductive and admin should step in and ban this CRAP . 


MEDICS , BE THE LEADERS AND ROLE MODELS YOU SHOULD BE AND KNOCK IT OFF !!!!!!!!!!


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## Emt /b/ (Mar 22, 2008)

I had no trouble reading this.


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## Explorer127 (May 5, 2008)

not one period in that long paragraph..


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## TgerFoxMark (May 20, 2008)

OK! I took the time to TRY and sort this thing out. (30 minutes) This is what i turned it into!

I Know this has nothing to do with what you are posting, but I remember not too long ago, I was sitting at work new years eve. We were getting slammed with calls that night along with every other ems/fire crews in the US.  We were just clearing the call when the dispatcher alerted us of an emotional disorder at the local city police station.
 It took about 4 minutes till we arrived on scene. I grabbed the 1st in bag, and told the driver to bring the stretcher to the front door.
I also had a junior aide with me on this call. We got to the front desk and they pointed and said cellblock. As we get in there to find a 27 year old female completely naked.
I asked the cop, why is she all naked and he said, “because she kept trying to hang her self so we striped her down.”
I started chuckling right then as we walked in, the lady came running at me full force and smack she came at me so hard I thought I got tackled by emit smith. When I got my bearings, every one was trying to calm this lady down. We finally get her on the stretcher. We almost got her in the ambulance and, once again, smack I really thought I got hit by mike Tyson. All along this lady was beating the C R A P out of me!
Mind you she was like 5'2 175. I was all embarrassed. They got her in the ambulance and I was trying to suck in all the pain form getting beat on. One of the cops looked at me and says, “Which one of you needs to go to the hospital?”
 I laughed and got into the ambulance and find my EMT student and my EMT/DRIVER trying to strap this lady in still.  The driver tried to get her to lay back and was holding her head when he gets head butted! His nose started to bleed so I told him to go up front right away and go lights/sirens hard to the hospital. Finally, my EMT student screams at the top of her lungs at first I thought I was going crazy but she said,  “I can scream louder, now are you going to let us be in charge?”  She all of a sudden stopped and said; “well if you say so,” My student asked are you going to stop hitting john? Because I think he is very good looking, do you want him to stay that way?” The patient said “yea.” Then looked at me and said “you are safe because you are hot”  
When we get to the hospital she did not give us any more trouble but as soon as I get out of the ambulance, I tripped and fell flat on my face! I started bleeding from the head; we walked in, two grown men, one with a nosebleed and the other bleeding from the head! And an EMT student untouched! The nurse who I was a good friend with said, “You like it rough don’t you?” John and I laughed. 
I thought this would give you guys a good Laugh.




Cleaned up as best I could by Tger!

Hope it helps some!
I honestly do not think the poster's first language is english.


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## CFRBryan347768 (May 20, 2008)

TgerFoxMark said:


> Cleaned up as best I could by Tger!
> 
> Hope it helps some!
> I honestly do not think the poster's first language is english.



What do you think its is Computer English? lol  some people just like to type with shortcuts that many people over 26 can not understand hehe


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## Sapphyre (May 20, 2008)

:snorts her diet soda all over bryan:

Bryan, at 27 I'm fluent in the "language" which pre-dates txt.  I understand txt just fine.  The problem is: this isn't the guy's phone, a fast moving chat, or the latest and greatest MMPRPG (or what ever they're calling those things now).  This is a forum; there is time to type properly, and go back and edit your post so that it conforms to most of the rules for written English (or American, if you'd prefer, but that's just a little TOO ethnocentric for an internet forum).  By the way, who resurrected this old thread?


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## CFRBryan347768 (May 20, 2008)

Sapphyre said:


> :snorts her diet soda all over bryan:
> 
> Bryan, at 27 I'm fluent in the "language" which pre-dates txt.  I understand txt just fine.  The problem is: this isn't the guy's phone, a fast moving chat, or the latest and greatest MMPRPG (or what ever they're calling those things now).  This is a forum; there is time to type properly, and go back and edit your post so that it conforms to most of the rules for written English (or American, if you'd prefer, but that's just a little TOO ethnocentric for an internet forum).  By the way, who resurrected this old thread?



Tger did, if you look above my post you can see that.


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## Sapphyre (May 20, 2008)

Actually, Bryan, it was omar, 15 days ago.  And then Tger.


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## CFRBryan347768 (May 20, 2008)

Sapphyre said:


> Actually, Bryan, it was omar, 15 days ago.  And then Tger.



Yes, but it was him who rephrashed it in normal English so those who couldn't read it could read it. Which directly leads to my comment.


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## mdkemt (May 20, 2008)

I thought it was kinda funny.  No problems reading it but I am use to proof reading.  English major will do that!

MDKEMT


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