# "you actually wrote that in a Run Report"...



## slb862 (Feb 22, 2011)

I had an ambulance bring in a pt. to the ED.  This was when they had written the report and would leave us a copy... anyway I found this quite amusing.

This is just an excerpt:  This is the actual way it was written.

"Responded to the scene of 89 yo female with left femur fx, upon arrival pt. was found in bed with first responder."

I just about peed myself. Thought I would share a little humor in "What Not to Write in a Run Report".

Everyone have a Happy filled day.


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## skills82 (Feb 22, 2011)

That's pretty funny right there. I bet it had everyone laughing for a bit.


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## 8jimi8 (Feb 22, 2011)

Was there mention of the angulation of the femur?

Sometimes i think about amputee coitus...


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## 8jimi8 (Feb 22, 2011)

Damn did i just post that?!! someone's got a great quotable sig now...


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## johnrsemt (Feb 23, 2011)

"  pt wound is :censored::censored::censored::censored::censored:"     "patient tripped and fell when someone horned them"

that is 2 that I can think of right off that I saw that people wrote when I was doing QA on runs.


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## rescue99 (Feb 23, 2011)

*Chief Complaint*

"Fall From ***" Pt. took a header off a donkey!


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## beandip4all (Feb 23, 2011)

slb862 said:


> I had an ambulance bring in a pt. to the ED.  This was when they had written the report and would leave us a copy... anyway I found this quite amusing.
> 
> This is just an excerpt:  This is the actual way it was written.
> 
> ...




huh... we had the EXACT SAME PCR given as a humorous example of what not to write during one of our training sessions...

must be a common error.


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## MEDIC802 (Feb 26, 2011)

DGTJACB that was a medics entire report, I belive he got fired for that.
(Done gone to Jesus, aint comming back)


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## Rotor Talker (Feb 26, 2011)

*Among many*

"Sick, put on cot, took to hospital"

"Pisco" insurance was another of our fav's, 

"Oh, I've not heard of that one" says the billing nazi

Sometime I sit back and shake my head, cannot believe we did that.


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## spike91 (Feb 27, 2011)

I scanned in the hospital facesheet to my PCR a few weeks back. Was having a conversation as I was finishing the documentation, and for the facesheet's description, accidentally put 'facebook.' Found that out after I committed it...whoops


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## shfd739 (Feb 27, 2011)

I remember in basic school being told of a medic that wrote "FTDNITBOMA" as their report. Translates to" fixing to die not in the back of my ambulance." the medic managed to not lose the suit against them but was done in EMS.


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## hocomedic (Mar 6, 2011)

i ran a call the other day and the first thing this guy said was " o thank god your guys are here i was masterbating so much i think i broke a nut." i was thinking about not wrighting it on my report, but i was taught to wright everything that the Pt. tells me so i did


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## TransportJockey (Mar 6, 2011)

hocomedic said:


> i ran a call the other day and the first thing this guy said was " o thank god your guys are here i was masterbating so much i think i broke a nut." i was thinking about not wrighting it on my report, but i was taught to wright everything that the Pt. tells me so i did



quotation marks are your friend in a situation like that


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## ffemt8978 (Mar 6, 2011)

jtpaintball70 said:


> quotation marks are your friend in a situation like that



True, but then you also have to document the physical exam.


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## TransportJockey (Mar 6, 2011)

ffemt8978 said:


> True, but then you also have to document the physical exam.



Very true. But he said he was trained to document exactly what the patient said  Hence the quotation marks. I've seen a few new EMTs get hammered on QA/QI because they wrote what the patient states w/out quotation marks and it was assumed that the EMT was making that assumption.


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## ffemt8978 (Mar 6, 2011)

jtpaintball70 said:


> Very true. But he said he was trained to document exactly what the patient said  Hence the quotation marks. I've seen a few new EMTs get hammered on QA/QI because they wrote what the patient states w/out quotation marks and it was assumed that the EMT was making that assumption.


Good point.


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## HotelCo (Mar 7, 2011)

hocomedic said:


> i ran a call the other day and the first thing this guy said was " o thank god your guys are here i was masterbating so much i think i broke a nut." i was thinking about not wrighting it on my report, but i was taught to wright everything that the Pt. tells me so i did



I'm not trying to be a jerk, but if your run reports are anything like what you posted, what do you think would be inferred about your EMS skills if it was shown in court?

Just something to think about.


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## Bullets (Mar 8, 2011)

"EMS arrived on scene to find a garbage can fully involved. EMS and PD knocked down fire with fire extinguishers, fire out, rendering FD useless upon arrival"

on our call shets there is a space for assisting PD, FD, EMS and MIC units. At a large structure fire, under assiting fire, we wrote "All of them", our QA didnt find it nearly as funny as we did

another EMT i know wrote "Arrived to find pt on floor, pt c/o FDGB(fall down go boom), put on cot, drive to hospital" aparently FDGB isnt an appropriate assessment, guy got canned for it


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## TransportJockey (Mar 8, 2011)

Bullets said:


> "EMS arrived on scene to find a garbage can fully involved. EMS and PD knocked down fire with fire extinguishers, fire out, rendering FD useless upon arrival"



you mean FD isn't useless all the time?


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## Bullets (Mar 8, 2011)

jtpaintball70 said:


> you mean FD isn't useless all the time?



oh they are, but our reports are upload to a cad system that EMS PD and Fire share. We did it because we knew FD would see it when they did their report and thusly tick them off. the POs and the PD dispathers thought it was hilarious, mostly because we share a gruding dislike of the hosemonkeys


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## mp5dude (Mar 13, 2011)

Bullets said:


> oh they are, but our reports are upload to a cad system that EMS PD and Fire share. We did it because we knew FD would see it when they did their report and thusly tick them off. the POs and the PD dispathers thought it was hilarious, mostly because we share a gruding dislike of the hosemonkeys



On an unrelated note - in regards to this post - LOL. I agree fully.


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## Sasha (Mar 13, 2011)

Yesterday I wrote the patient was very grumpy because I couldn't remember how to spell agitated.


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## mkthefiregirl (Mar 21, 2011)

One of my first run reports I ever wrote years ago as a newbie was for a dialysis transfer, pt had prior CABG. I wrote in my report pt had CABG x 3 enroute. Apparently, I may have been a newbie but I was already a cardio-thoracic surgeon. No big deal. Haha


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## WAmedic (Mar 22, 2011)

One of the emt's that no longer works for us wrote "drunker than Cooter Brown's dog" for his impression of the patient.


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## Sasha (Mar 22, 2011)

mkthefiregirl said:


> One of my first run reports I ever wrote years ago as a newbie was for a dialysis transfer, pt had prior CABG. I wrote in my report pt had CABG x 3 enroute. Apparently, I may have been a newbie but I was already a cardio-thoracic surgeon. No big deal. Haha



Didn't you know you could get that cert with just a week long class? Although I hear rumors of accelerated schools that take only 3 days.


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## lightsandsirens5 (Mar 22, 2011)

One of the first calls I ever went on was an accidental overdose. We showed up on scene to find the guy leaning over his porch railing shoving a toothbrush down his throat. When asked what he was doing, he replied that he was trying to make himself puke up the pills.

So I wrote this in my report; Arrived on scene to find a 50 y/o M Pt attempting to gag himself with a toothbrush. Pt stated that he was "trying to puke up those extra pills, but it isn't working."  

Hey, that is what I saw!


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## TXMEDIC5317 (Mar 22, 2011)

Didn't really write this but did joke about it with a few guys.
Abbrevation for nursing home: GSF- Geriatric storage facility.


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## blinnbuc89 (Apr 4, 2011)

One pt did not like my clip board and the following ensued:

Pt: I do not like your book
Me: Excuse me?
Pt: I do NOT like your BOOK!
Me: I'm sorry to hear that. 
Pt: I don't
Me: Well sir, what do you want me to do about it?
Pt: You can shove it up your ***. 
(Pt is a ~85 y/o man, very pleasant over than his hatred for my clipboard.)
Me: What's that?
Pt: You Fuc#ing heard me
Me: Sir that was not very nice 
at this point he attempted to hit my leg and i dodged him
Me: Sir, do not hit me. You will not like the consequences. 
Pt: I'm sorry
and he sat with his hands in his lap for the remainder of the ride. 
I wrote it in my narrative just to see how finely they pick through our reports for our QA/QI. I was conversed with during my next shift about said narrative. I forgot to put quotes on one set of the dialogue and they wanted me to add them. I almost died laughing.


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## Kamischke (Apr 11, 2011)

I was writing my narrative on our way back from a call while talking with my partner and listening to music.

I unknowingly wrote "Arrived on *scenery* to *all the ladies*-" and then, thank god, i caught myself...

apparently when i'm distracted, i cant spell scene and when i hear "to all the ladies in the house" on the radio, my hand unconsciously writes it down instead of "a 54 y/o female pt"

:wacko:


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## DillR (Apr 11, 2011)

Kamischke said:


> I was writing my narrative on our way back from a call while talking with my partner and listening to music.
> 
> I unknowingly wrote "Arrived on *scenery* to *all the ladies*-" and then, thank god, i caught myself...
> 
> ...



:lol:


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## slb862 (Apr 11, 2011)

LOL that is funny.


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