# 12 Days of Christman - EMS style



## emtchic83 (Dec 19, 2004)

I got this in my email today and had to share.... It's one of the best I have ever heard, and so true...


The 12 Days of Christmas - EMS Style"

On the First day of Christmas, my Dispatcher gave to me...Grandma who fell and
hurt her knee...

On the Second Day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me...2 MG of Narcan for
the out of work person who wants to end it all by taking her Husband's pain
pills and won't tell me what she took and is feeling suicidal....and grandma
who fell and hurt her knee.

On the Third day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me....Three stacked shocks
for the 88 year old man who instead of paying the neighbor kid 5 bucks to
shovel his driveway, decided to do it himself and have the big one in the
driveway...2 Mg of Narcan for the psycho chick trying to off herself...and
grandma who fell and hurt her knee..

On the Fourth day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me....4 AM in the morning
I have to go to the nursing home because someone has had the flu for like 16
years and all of a sudden needs to go to the hospital....NOW,...Three Stacked
shocks for the full arrested popsicle, 2 MG of Narcan for Morphine eating
Momma..and Grandma who fell and hurt her knee....

On the Fifth day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me...Five minutes to
eat.....4 AM shuttle call, Three stacked shocks, 2 MG of Narcan, and Grandma
who fell and hurt her knee....

On the Sixth Day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me....Six run reports
behind because the computer guy can't fix the system..Five Minutes to
eat!!!!!!!!!! 4 AM Shuttle, 3 zaps to the chest, gonna have a stomach pumped,
and grandma who fell and hurt her knee...

On the Seventh day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me...Seven car pile up
while everyone was trying to beat the light so they can get into Wal Mart the
day after Thanksgiving thinking there is only 4 dancing Elmo Dolls...six
reports behind...Five minutes to eat.......4AM is way to early, 3 stacked
shocks, 2 of Narcan Pushed, and grandma who fell and hurt her knee....

On the Eighth day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me....Eight flights of
steps to walk up to get the 400 pound person who is having shortness of breath
since LAST Christmas and can't walk...oh, and of course, the elevator doesn't
work...7 cars a crunching, six reports a writing, Five minutes to eat. 4 AM
shuttle, CPR in progress, 2 MG of Narcan, and grandma who fell and hurt her
knee...

On the ninth day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me Nine blankets needed to
cover up grandpa because he is freezing and we aren't even out of the house yet
but thinks he will get pneumonia and die for all of the 10 seconds we are
outside...Eight flights of stairs, should have stayed home and bought off of
Ebay, six reporst I'm writing...Five minutes to eat.....What the Hell time is
it, should have paid the kid, 2MG of Narcan, and grandma who fell and hurt her
knee.

On the Tenth Day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me...Ten Minutes till I can
get a bed in the ER because the nurses are busy figuring out who is going to
lunch next....Nine blankets needed, Hope fire department is coming, 7 cars a
crunching, six reports I need to write, Five minutes to eat...Can't you wait
till morning, sick a fork in him, he's done, Man I hope she shuts up..and
grandma who fell and hurt her knee.

On the Eleventh day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me....Eleven times I
tried to get the heat to work in the back of the truck and maintainence won't
take the truck in...ten minutes waiting, Nine blankets needed, eight flights of
steps to climb, Hope you have Progressive, Give me a new ink pen...Five minutes
to eat....4 AM is early, 3 Leads all show he's dead, 2 MG won't touoch her..and
grandma who fell and hurt her knee...

On the Twelth day of Christmas, my dispatcher gave to me..a 12 Gague IV needle
that I put into the drunk 19 year old who tried to swing at me...it is really
freezing, Hope you choke on your sandwich, 9 blankets for grandpa, How did you
get up here in the first place, man your husband is gonna be pissed, six
reports STILL down...five minutes to eat...Better than taking them back, Hope I
recorded the code, Man, just pass out already...and grandma who fell and hit her
knee...

Merry Christmas


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## PArescueEMT (Dec 19, 2004)

:lol: ROTFLMAO I havent laughed like that in a while.

Thanks


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## EMTstudent (Dec 20, 2004)

OMG!!!!!!


That was the funniest I have ever read...My boss looked at me funny because i was laughing outloud!!

Thanks guys... I needed that!


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## rescuecpt (Dec 20, 2004)

We had our "Operation Frosty" this weekend... I put the pictures I took on Ofoto.com (Our more professional photographer hasn't put his pics up yet.)  The first half of the pics are from Friday night when some of us Senior Corps and some Youth Squad Members went to the local Boy Scouts' Holiday party to hand out gifts (their pinewood derby cars) and collect the toys they collected for us to give to charity.  I'm the elf with "the bumps on her chest" as one of my Chiefs put it...  The second half of the pictures are from Saturday's Operation Frosty - we made over 75 stops during the day Saturday with 2 Chiefs cars, 5 ambulances, and a van pulling the trailer with Frosty and the presents we collected.  Each child we saw got a little goodie bag with a beanie Frosty or Rudolph, candy, stickers, and some face time with Santa.  I'm the blonde in the white sweatshirt - accosting Rudolph in one of the pics and with another EMT on my lap in the ambulance in another pic.  (ok guys, QUIET, hehehe).
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?c=fvw3k8l.9yq2fa5t&x=0&y=qo9wja 


On Sunday the FD had "Operation Santa"... similar concept, smaller department.
http://www.angelfire.com/ny4/enfd/opsanta04/


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## EMTAngel4 (Dec 20, 2004)

If that weren't so true it wouldn't be nearly as funny. WE are just all sick sick people. But we're happy that way.


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## PArescueEMT (Dec 20, 2004)

> _Originally posted by EMTAngel4_@Dec 20 2004, 06:33 PM
> * If that weren't so true it wouldn't be nearly as funny. WE are just all sick sick people. But we're happy that way. *


 yup yup yup!

and welcome to the forum! hope you post again soon.


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## lindsayn2 (Dec 21, 2004)

Oh that was great!!! Gave me the extra boost I needed to get through the hoidays and not have to commit myself because I am going more crazy than my patients.  Now when I am driving down the road at 3 o'clock in the morning to go to yet another, you should have called a taxi, call I can sing this to myslef and smile.  Thanks!!!


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