Dumbest thing heard on the radio

emtcboots said:
Me: "Communications, send LEO to intersection of hwy 70 and pedestrian crosswalk. The big, giant pedestrian crosswalk"
Dispatch: "10-4, can we request a reason why?"
Me: "Patient fled unit at stop sign"
Dispatch: "Are you saying that the patient jumped out of the truck at the stop sign?"
Me: "Affirmative"
Dispatch: "What is patient's location now?"
Me: "No idea. That's why we need LEO"
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This actually made me laugh out loud!
 
johnrsemt said:
Just remember that when you are teaching CPR in a business, with other people in the building that EVERYONE in the building needs to know that there is a CPR class going on.

I had 30+ 911 calls from a business I was teaching at when my first student yelled "you, go call 911 for an Unresponsive person". they did and I got a full Box Alarm dispatched due to all of the calls
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Oh no! That would be my luck as well...
 
Rescue 1, Med 11, you'll be responding on a 36 year old who is breathing but not alert, RP is stating that patient slipped and fell and struck her head.
Med 11 ok.

Rescue 1 and Med 11, be advised that the patient is reported to be having a seizure. The caller is also stating that the patient is intoxicated and non-responsible.
11 alrighttttt.

Yup dispatch, you got that one right.
 
As it turned out she just pulled one over on her family. Fall down drunk in front of family and fiance?? Well why not just fake a seizure then.
 
Tigger said:
As it turned out she just pulled one over on her family. Fall down drunk in front of family and fiance?? Well why not just fake a seizure then.
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That makes me think of a picture, but a certain someone spanked me the last time I included the link :p
 
U-Alarm this is unit emergency traffic
D-go ahead unit
U-We are outside of station and our unit is on fire
D- copy unit, out of service.
 
WildlandEMT89 said:
U-Alarm this is unit emergency traffic
D-go ahead unit
U-We are outside of station and our unit is on fire
D- copy unit, out of service.
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Reminds me of an incident we had:

U: 3-4 to base
D: Go ahead 3-4
U: Our squad just caught fire
D: Copy 3-4...uhhh can you drive it back to base?
 
Accidentally letting out a massive deep hearty YAAAAWN when talking to Control is a great way of letting them know you are ready for a break.
 
Radio'd dispatch one day to say my right rear duals came off and passed me; they asked if we could put them back on and drive back.
 
D-Please respond to a man down, unknown problem at 1123 cave street.
U- Can you repeat that street again?
D- 1123 cave street
U- Dispatch do mean C. Avenue?
D-10-4 C. Avenue

Man there could have been Dave street, Gave street, Have street, Wave street...etc
 
This happened awhile ago... Dispatched for a 10-50 PI Semi vs. Guard Rail.

U- A34 arriving scene..."OH HELL Dispatch We need all available ALS units in the county on this.
D- A34, Please advise
U- Dispatch there are bodies everywhere dispatch additional Units
D- A34, 10-4 (They Dispatch all available Units, Several respond)
U- A34- 10-22 all additional units, there are manikins laying on the roadway.
D- A34, say again?
U- Dispatch 10-22 responding crews. "I was a dummy."
 
Listened to a fire dispatch to a BUSH fire at a gas station down the street from their station.
When they got close they told dispatch to upgrade to a box alarm for a BUS fire.
What the difference an H makes when you are call taking.

Also was at the local hospital when a High Rise box alarm (3 trucks, 5 engines) got dispatched to the same hospital for a working wildfire outside the ambulance bay: 3 ambulance crews looked at each other, walked outside and there were 2 small bushes burning with the mulch in between. we used the hose from the backboard washing station, a small garbage can to carry water. and our boots. Tried to tell dispatch to downgrade the response and was told since we were NOT fire units we couldn't do that.
 
spiffy said:
Just a quick question... I'm in beginning stages of learning EMS... what does a SOB mean?
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I didn't figure it out for a while either. My EMT instructor kept talking about using PASTE for SOB patients. I had fun using my imagination with that one.
 
ochacon80 said:
I don't have a specific occurrence but I know a few times a couple of our dispatches have said patient names over the radios, I cringe every time it happens.
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How about, at a standby event, the patient's name and full medical history over the radio including multiple repetitions of "patient has AIDS." Cringe does not even begin to describe it.
 
NJN said:
PD had received a few calls about a possible Black Bear roaming a neighborhood.


Dispatch: Unit ## what's your status.
Unit: "Be vewy vewy quiet we're hunting a vewy vewy big wabbit"
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LOL. One of the funniest I've read on this thread :D
 
Team: Base from team.

Base (me): This is base

Team: your (indecipherable) waffle (indexipherable)

Base: please repeat waffle traffic. I was unable to copy.

Team: I said we're taking our own slow time walking back with the waffles you ordered. And if I may add, the waffles from this place are so crisp and delicious.

Base: (hold the mic the lose it laughing)

Base: I copy your waffle traffic.
 
A few minutes after being dispatched to a firehouse.

Fire: "Dispatch, there are two unknown vehicles behind the firehouse."
Dispatch: "Let me guess, one's white and one's black and white."
 
I heard one once where the person was having a seizure while at a burger king, and apparently the person who called 911 called in saying there was a "flopper at the whopper" and the dispatcher relayed the information the same way, saying that there was a "flopper at the whopper" on xxxxx street.
 
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