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Dumbest thing heard on the radio

Discussion in 'EMS Humor' started by HasTy, Feb 22, 2009.

  1. EMT Punter

    EMT Punter Forum Ride Along

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    Ambulance 0000 be in route to #### for a 14 yo male with powerful magnets clamped on penis. Be advised mother stated she could not get them off.
     
  2. Grimes

    Grimes Forum Asst. Chief

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    Looks like someone needs the jaws of life.

    ~80's porn beat~
     
    Jim37F likes this.
  3. AcadianExplorer1910

    AcadianExplorer1910 Forum Crew Member

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    we had a few psych patients do that
     
  4. cruiseforever

    cruiseforever Forum Captain

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    Code 2 to a pt. complaining twitching in their butt cheeks.
     
  5. Underoath87

    Underoath87 Forum Asst. Chief

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    I've always wondered what that "anal spasms" impression box was for in ePCR...
     
  6. RedAirplane

    RedAirplane Forum Asst. Chief

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    My first time overseeing a special event, I said something stupid:

    "Attention all teams, security is responding to report of a fight near the entrance, please shelter in place and return to base immediately. Standby for roll call. Team 1 ..."

    The question then became... should they shelter in place or return to base? :O
     
  7. jacollins95

    jacollins95 Forum Crew Member

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    Tired of this S***, Dispatch goes be advised ******* county units open mic.
     
  8. Jim37F

    Jim37F Forum Deputy Chief

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    Overheard this little gem of an exchange over the fire radio...
    [Engine company enroute to a public assist call]: "(Dispatch), Engine (XYZ), am I reading the text on this call correctly? There's a cat on the porch??"
    (Dispatch): "Engine XYZ, that's affirmative, caller is requesting fire department assistance"
    (Engine) "Uh, copy....is this like a lion or something??" (More than a little incredulousnes in the Captains voice)
    (Dispatch) "You're text just says 'cat'"
    (Engine)"...copy"
     
  9. StCEMT

    StCEMT Forum Deputy Chief

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    Why does that even get dispatched? The only response to that should be "that's nice dear" *click*
     
  10. CALEMT

    CALEMT The Other Guy

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    Good ole LACo.
     
  11. dutemplar

    dutemplar Forum Captain

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    The nice thing about Qatar,... I had left work and drove the other way about an hour before this.

    https://www.theguardian.com/world/video/2016/mar/08/tiger-loose-on-qatar-highway-video

    The most amusing thing from home was politically incorrect. One chief placing the medic unit in service, no injuries, return the box. The medic keying up and advising they had double entrapment and requesting an expedite on the rescue as well as a helicopter. Chief telling County to standby... Medic requesting County for PSP to drug test the chief, "I think he's smoking crack."

    I was yelled at for saying that...
     
    johnrsemt likes this.
  12. Adam Doll

    Adam Doll Forum Ride Along

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    This is more of a "did they really just say that" moment than funny.

    I had a dispatcher state and I quote "pt appears retarded". I couldn't imagine what this particular dispatcher was thinking but she isn't the brightest crown in the box either.
     
  13. Underoath87

    Underoath87 Forum Asst. Chief

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    Are crowns normally kept in boxes? I'd rather wear mine, or at least display it...
     
  14. Adam Doll

    Adam Doll Forum Ride Along

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    Wow total brain fart. crayon*
     
  15. Grimes

    Grimes Forum Asst. Chief

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    That or you spells it how youssays it. "Crown" works in some states :p
     
  16. NPO

    NPO Forum Deputy Chief

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    "having a seizure, having trouble walking"

    Sent from my Pixel XL using Tapatalk
     
  17. Medic27

    Medic27 Forum Lieutenant

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    Please note the dispatchers in this rural area are stupider than a light bulb and the dispatch management isn't any better.

    Dispatcher: "Medic 1 please respond to (address) for a ground level fall 28 year old male code blue."
    Medic 1" Just confirming, 28 year old male code blue ground level fall, any other information on the patient?"
    Dispatcher: Patient is complaining of pain in their lower back...

    What the ****? Come on, she didn't even know what a code blue was but she said it because it sounded right... My God.. That's the most stupid one ever.
     
  18. NPO

    NPO Forum Deputy Chief

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    BLS: Dispatch, unit, we have a walker at station 1.
    Dispatch: Affirmative. We're on the phone with PD

    Walker may not be a universal term, so I'll explain. It comes from the walking dead, obviously, and refers to chronic drug users who have completely fried their brains that they simply wanted around like zombies, often flailing and talking to themselves. Not something I'd expect to hear on the radio.

    Sent from my Pixel XL using Tapatalk
     
  19. Gemma Beauchamp

    Gemma Beauchamp Forum Ride Along

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    Coming home from an airlift call when our chief told everyone on the road that there was a suicidal elk and to watch out for it.
     

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