Glucatron
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Dumbest thing heard on the radio
- Thread starter HasTy
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Had one out here just a few months ago; county radio animal control officer dispatched to check out a loose black dog in a back yard.
Officer marked on scene and stated he was going to check out the yard before making contact with the caller.
About 30 seconds later I heard on the radio heavy breathing/panting and officer yelling "That isn't a black dog it is a _________ BLACK BEAR". Turned out that as he walked around the corner of the house the bear was standing on his hind legs looking in a window; and it turned to look at him as he turned the corner, at about 3-4 feet away. Lady that called it in said that it was a 'funny looking black dog'.
Bear was watched by a few neighbors and the police as it went back into the mountains on its own.
Officer marked on scene and stated he was going to check out the yard before making contact with the caller.
About 30 seconds later I heard on the radio heavy breathing/panting and officer yelling "That isn't a black dog it is a _________ BLACK BEAR". Turned out that as he walked around the corner of the house the bear was standing on his hind legs looking in a window; and it turned to look at him as he turned the corner, at about 3-4 feet away. Lady that called it in said that it was a 'funny looking black dog'.
Bear was watched by a few neighbors and the police as it went back into the mountains on its own.
LACoGurneyjockey
Forum Asst. Chief
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Listening to the fire scanner,
-Patrol X, Engine X, can you make your way up the hill to the engine, the engine is not pumping water, and we need to pump water on the fire. So can you bring the patrol up here and hook it up so we can pump water. Because the engine is not pumping water at the moment and we need water on this fire.
-Uh, copy, put the fire out.
-Patrol X, Engine X, can you make your way up the hill to the engine, the engine is not pumping water, and we need to pump water on the fire. So can you bring the patrol up here and hook it up so we can pump water. Because the engine is not pumping water at the moment and we need water on this fire.
-Uh, copy, put the fire out.
Ace 227
Forum Lieutenant
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Heard a call for a woman "with heavy vaginal bleeding. She also has a battery stuck in her vagina. She isn't sure if that caused the bleeding or not but its, uh... in there."
emt11
Forum Lieutenant
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Well that couldn't possibly be the problem. Better get the rookie to check it out with the forceps and make sure he brings the size 7 fallopian tube.
Rin
Forum Captain
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FiremanMike
Just a dude
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emt11
Forum Lieutenant
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You were much nicer on the radio than I would have been..
Makes you wonder... what kind of special (lots of explicits) doesn't believe that we can tell the difference between someone's house being on fire or not. Well maybe I don't believe you that we have a call next time.
Meursault
Organic Mechanic
- 759
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"A-18, you're showing an emergency alert. Everything alright? No terrorists in the truck?"
*facepalm*
*remembers q4 roll call during the lockdown*
*double facepalm*
*facepalm*
*remembers q4 roll call during the lockdown*
*double facepalm*
FiremanMike
Just a dude
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More importantly it's nice to know that they don't take your safety seriously..
Sheesh, this thread is supposed to be funny, there's stuff on here that's damn infuriating...
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Yea I agree. That's ridiculous. A 10-78 alarm here stops everything and starts the world towards the last known location of that unit, LE jurisdictional lines do not apply, until that unit comes up code 4 with their names and ID numbers.
emt11
Forum Lieutenant
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HA, our little orange(emergency) button makes for a nice scan on/off button on our 800 radios because someone got the brilliant idea to disable the emergency button and of course you can always key up and say you have an emergency which isn't always possible and then of course dispatch is going to want to know why before they start working on getting PD to us. At which I work at a private 3rd service with it's own dispatch center that is totally separate from the county 911 center and the few city 911 centers that have their own PD so it'll be at least an additional minute before anyone is even dispatched to you.
Dispatch: Unit 21 have you departed for hospital?
Unit 21: Negative, due to location we are having difficulty reversing the ambulance backwards....
.... well no sh*t .....reversing backwards... ooo wouldn't want to confuse that with reversing forwards!!!
Unit 21: Negative, due to location we are having difficulty reversing the ambulance backwards....
.... well no sh*t .....reversing backwards... ooo wouldn't want to confuse that with reversing forwards!!!
Last edited by a moderator:
mycrofft
Still crazy but elsewhere
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T-Shirt!
mycrofft
Still crazy but elsewhere
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A reserve deputy in Flagstaff (or was it Yuma?) of my later acquaintance was on the way home from a call and stopped for a beer. Two local big rowdies started pushing and shoving each other and breaking stuff, so he stepped in. Being only five-seven made him sort of unimpressive to look at (sorry, man!
) but being an ex-Ranger with a tour in Vietnam made him decisive. He cuffed one guy, the other approached and he clubbed him with his handheld Motorola, then cuffed him and brought them in using his own car.
The mike button stuck on when he used it as a shillelagh so his modified Miranda injunction to them both, which was close to "I don't want to hear anything about it until we get to the station" and subsequent attempts to call in, were on the entire net. The battery died on the way in.
Sergeant calls him in. My co-worker says "Sorry for bringing them in without radioing first, the battery died.."
"…and you didn't want to hear anything about it until they were in, right?". (smiles).
Coworker: :huh:
As he walked out of the office the guys in the office stood and applauded.
) but being an ex-Ranger with a tour in Vietnam made him decisive. He cuffed one guy, the other approached and he clubbed him with his handheld Motorola, then cuffed him and brought them in using his own car. The mike button stuck on when he used it as a shillelagh so his modified Miranda injunction to them both, which was close to "I don't want to hear anything about it until we get to the station" and subsequent attempts to call in, were on the entire net. The battery died on the way in.
Sergeant calls him in. My co-worker says "Sorry for bringing them in without radioing first, the battery died.."
"…and you didn't want to hear anything about it until they were in, right?". (smiles).
Coworker: :huh:
As he walked out of the office the guys in the office stood and applauded.
ThunderMedic223
Forum Ride Along
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This is the best one I have found do far
spnjsquad
Forum Crew Member
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1) During a day crew someone from dispatch started playing the song "I just died in your arms tonight" for about a full two minutes.
2) One dispatcher forgot to turn the mic off and proceeded to say "F**K" a couple times, then once more when she realized she had said that into the radio.
2) One dispatcher forgot to turn the mic off and proceeded to say "F**K" a couple times, then once more when she realized she had said that into the radio.
Lucky the FCC wasn't listening...I'm told that's a big no-no.
Sorta reminds of when Dispatch was giving us a extremely complicated address, and the radio kept messing up the transmission...after the third 10-5 (repeat last) from us, she said "Jesus Christ, just call the base. I'm not reading that again."