the 100% directionless thread

Some people are complete morons. That is all. Now return to your directionless banter.
 
jgaddis82 said:
Thanks n7! That's very helpful. Studying OB/GYN is giving me brain cramps!
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Here's my Paramedic OB class in a nutshell:

Babies come outta the Hoo Hoo. If it doesn't stop bleeding, massage the fundus and drive faster. If the foot or arm comes out first, drive faster. Breech? Make a airway with your fingers in the Hoo Hoo and drive faster. If the cord is prolapsed, keep it damp, mama is buns up kneeling and... you guessed it... drive faster. Nuchal cord? Cut and clamp. Remember where you keep the APGAR chart, cuz nobody ever remembers that stuff. Oh, Pitocin is good if you carry it. If not, oh well. Class dismissed.
 
So apparently it's faster to ship a book from England than it is for Riverside Court to put the results of a traffic court trial into their system.
 
n7lxi said:
Here's my Paramedic OB class in a nutshell:

Babies come outta the Hoo Hoo. If it doesn't stop bleeding, massage the fundus and drive faster. If the foot or arm comes out first, drive faster. Breech? Make a airway with your fingers in the Hoo Hoo and drive faster. If the cord is prolapsed, keep it damp, mama is buns up kneeling and... you guessed it... drive faster. Nuchal cord? Cut and clamp. Remember where you keep the APGAR chart, cuz nobody ever remembers that stuff. Oh, Pitocin is good if you carry it. If not, oh well. Class dismissed.
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Hoo haw not Hoo Hoo ;)

That's about how my lecture went too.

Side note I found out I get first pick on clinicals cause I'm ranked número UNO wooooohooooooo not having to worry about bartering to make them work with my schedule
 
Dear OEMS,
I would really like it, love it actually, if you would stop being the bane of my CE existence. All I want is a simple "yes" or "no". That's it. And an updated card with the correct spelling of my name. Which I requested 3 weeks ago. Please and thank you.
 
Ob/gyn

n7- you forgot to mention that the umbilical is not a bungee cord. And if you drop the baby, fake a seizure.
 
jgaddis82 said:
n7- you forgot to mention that the umbilical is not a bungee cord. And if you drop the baby, fake a seizure.
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True, but baby catching is a BLS skill. I'll be in the airway seat, out of the way of the effluent.
 
Kids ( esp neonates) don't have great vascular control and can't really increase inotropy as a way of compensation. As such, HR is the only way to increase cardiac output.

A bradycardic kid is a decompensating kid.
 
n7lxi said:
True, but baby catching is a BLS skill. I'll be in the airway seat, out of the way of the effluent.
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Which is why I've never understood the desire of some people in EMS wanting to change the census in their ambulance. When it's all said and done, somebody has to clean it up. :blink:
 
Four words that will make even the laziest/slowest firefighter move at the speed if light: "The baby is crowning."
 
'Whiff Test" stage two: then you look at the slide under a microscope. If it has fungus as well or primarily, you will see the cellulose filaments of hyphae, since they resist the KOH while the KOH dissolves any proteinaceous material, as well as the chrome on your microscope objective's nosepiece. Or the tips of your fingers, or corneas.
 
c6e4ded3-b266-a8f4.jpg


It's a good day off
 
I was going to stay away for a while, but instead I'm just scaling back. Sorry all.
 
I'm back... The few hours at the team meeting was quite exhausting. My head smokes and my muscles hurt. We had to vacate the equipment vehicles completely empty and check. This year we have many big events.
After the equipment check, we then have BLS / ALS trained...
I do not like to see more ..... algorithms :huh:
 
I got to transport a pair of shoes and a hat to the hospital today. No patient just his shoes and hat.

He was in a car accident 20 mins earlier and our medic crew who responded to him accidentally let his shoes and hat on scene.
 
firefite said:
I got to transport a pair of shoes and a hat to the hospital today. No patient just his shoes and hat.

He was in a car accident 20 mins earlier and our medic crew who responded to him accidentally let his shoes and hat on scene.
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That sounds very motivating. :huh:
 
12 hours at the station and we left three times. Two cancellations and a trip to the grocery store.

Relief shows up, I hand them keys, pager and radio...

beep beep beep beep beep

"Cardiac arrest with CPR in progress"

That's a bad start to the night. I hope karma doesn't pay me back tomorrow night, cuz I'll admit I was snickering a little as I drove out of the lot...
 
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