Omg dont touch me!

MissTrishEMTB08 said:
McFeely wasn't going home either, she was leaving the hospital to go to the ame hospice(coincidentally in the same room that we dropped the dead one off in.).
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Do you read anything that people have tried to say to you? You're exterior shell is getting thicker and thicker. I know that there is a caring compassionate person inside you somewhere and I am not sure if it is your youth or your relative lack of experience that makes you come across so callous. I have a feeling that your experiences in youth have cause you do develop a facade for coping with the world. Girl - you have a long way to go and this field is going to bring you to a place I'm not sure you want to go. Take this as the best advice I can give - from someone who is decades down the road ahead of you.
 
I have been loathe to respond to this post because of the OP's lack of any compassion and how she phrases things leave much to be desired. Where you drop off the dead ones off?? If you worked on my floor at the hospital we would of already chewed you up and spit you out for how rude you have been!

While I am still fairly "new" in the EMT world with only 4 years under my belt, I would NEVER be as cold and callous as you have been nor have said what you have said in your posts. If that is what you feel about someone who is in the end stages of their life, perhaps it is better for you to find another area to work in as compassion isn't your forte is it? When I was 20 I started in hospice care as a private CNA and let me tell you, I learned a lot and am very enriched in my life for it. I prefer hospice care over everything else I have done, save being an EMT, and if we would only learn to be tolerant and listen instead of flapping our mouth, we may learn something from that person you seem so loath to let touch you. It was an elderly woman, get over yourself !

I can only hope that when it is your turn to die, you get stuck with some lass with your hang ups who treats you like crap and won't take the time to touch your hand or place her hand on yours, look in your eyes, offer up a smile and let them know that they are there for them. Something so simple means so much. Maybe when your confused and know your dying and no one is there for you, you may get a clue but by then, it will be too late. And stop using your personal problems to justify your ignorance in your job.
 
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And really, calling your patient McFeely REALLY stinks of immaturity. Surely too immature to be in charge of peoples lives.

Honestly Trish, another career may be the best for you and dare I say it, better for your service...
 
^ Hehehe. I was totally thinking that when I read "McFeely", too!

I actually prefer it when patients place their hands/forearms on my knee. Like when I'm taking a blood pressure, it just seems more comfortable and kind for them to let them know they can rest their hands on my knee and relax while I tell them what I'm going to do. The last thing I want is for a patient to have a bad EMS experience that would have been solely prevented by a little compassion from me. Afterall, when a patient is in the ambulance it is probably one of the worst days they've had in a LONG time.

One of the best calls I've had so far was a transport of an elderly woman with dementia who would not let go of my hand, and even gripped my knee and my cargo pockets. I was in the back with another basic who took vitals while I talked to the woman and let her grip my fingers. Even though she didn't have the foggiest idea what was going on, you could tell she was frightened and really sought comfort in the compassion of one of her caregivers. If I hadn't opened myself up to such a "feely" woman, I would have never had that experience of connecting with a patient and feeling like I made their EMS experience a little more positive, regardless of whether or not she will remember it. And isn't that a lot of what this job is about? Trying to make the best of someone else's terrible situation?

If anything, I sometimes worry that my hand-on-shoulder, reassuring the patient methods are a little too touchy-feely. I try to keep my distance, but sometimes they really do look so scared.

MissTrish, I wish you luck. You've gotten a lot of really harsh comments here but also a lot of really good advice. I hope you take it to heart!
 
I still agree with & think Rid and BossyCow said it best. I am truly sorry for what happened when you were a child. Now, I know I'm just a new EMT w/o much experience I completely admit, so I'm just throwing my newbie 2 cents in.
Even first going into this field, while I was in school, I was aware it's about the patients & pretty much constant contact with them so even by my clinicals I was ready for that....and I think what helped me adjust so quick besides just being a people person is I helped teach preschool before doing this so I was use to people grabbing, peeing, pulling, drooling, taking my hand, awkwardly touching my legs--(think of the height of a 3 y/o), etc. all the time & not necessarily w/ my permission...lol. Yeah, and in my opinion uhh no one is ever really comfortable with the dirty old man who "accidentally" pinches your butt when your detangling O2 tubing, but hey it's part of the package whether you're outgoing or shy. I'd take that or a knee rub anyday over someone: threatening to kick my A**, a drunk, or being combative with feces all over them. Especially when they're alert & know/sense the end is near I would not only allow appropriate physical contact; I consider it part of my job and try to be sincere no matter what is going through my head b/c even an elderly person with dementia can read body language & emotion. Everybody does and should have boundaries especially those that work in this field, but unfortunately not everyone we encounter on a daily basis in it has them (if they ever did). You just have to prepare yourself for that. I think whatever reasons anyone in or considering being in the healthcare field has with physical contact need to be resolved if you are going to stay in it, b/c the majority of patients are going to have hands ^_^
 
MedicAngel said:
I have been loathe to respond to this post because of the OP's lack of any compassion and how she phrases things leave much to be desired. Where you drop off the dead ones off?? If you worked on my floor at the hospital we would of already chewed you up and spit you out for how rude you have been!

While I am still fairly "new" in the EMT world with only 4 years under my belt, I would NEVER be as cold and callous as you have been nor have said what you have said in your posts. If that is what you feel about someone who is in the end stages of their life, perhaps it is better for you to find another area to work in as compassion isn't your forte is it? When I was 20 I started in hospice care as a private CNA and let me tell you, I learned a lot and am very enriched in my life for it. I prefer hospice care over everything else I have done, save being an EMT, and if we would only learn to be tolerant and listen instead of flapping our mouth, we may learn something from that person you seem so loath to let touch you. It was an elderly woman, get over yourself !

I can only hope that when it is your turn to die, you get stuck with some lass with your hang ups who treats you like crap and won't take the time to touch your hand or place her hand on yours, look in your eyes, offer up a smile and let them know that they are there for them. Something so simple means so much. Maybe when your confused and know your dying and no one is there for you, you may get a clue but by then, it will be too late. And stop using your personal problems to justify your ignorance in your job.
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Whoooooa doggy. There seems to be a lot of assumption in this post (Actually, on the entire thread.)

The OP clearly stated that the woman's patient care didn't suffer and that the patient had liked being transported by her. She stated she wouldn't have minded holding hands. Where did it state anywhere that she didn't maintain eye contact or smile at them? Actually, in later posts the OP states she laughed and joked with her. I've never seen someone who can laugh with out smiling.

Maybe I'm just retarded, but I can't fathom how anyone can equate someone not wanting their legged touched to not having compassion.
 
imurphy said:
And really, calling your patient McFeely REALLY stinks of immaturity. Surely too immature to be in charge of peoples lives.

Honestly Trish, another career may be the best for you and dare I say it, better for your service...
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Would you have rather her used the patient's real name? Violation of the privacy act, isn't it?
 
Kaisu said:
Do you read anything that people have tried to say to you? You're exterior shell is getting thicker and thicker. I know that there is a caring compassionate person inside you somewhere and I am not sure if it is your youth or your relative lack of experience that makes you come across so callous. I have a feeling that your experiences in youth have cause you do develop a facade for coping with the world. Girl - you have a long way to go and this field is going to bring you to a place I'm not sure you want to go. Take this as the best advice I can give - from someone who is decades down the road ahead of you.
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Jesus H. Home girl can't catch a break, can she? What would you have rather her posted? "Layed the dead woman to rest in"? I'm almost certain that's not what happened. I've always heard people say they "dropped their patients off".
 
Sasha said:
Jesus H. Home girl can't catch a break, can she? What would you have rather her posted? "Layed the dead woman to rest in"? I'm almost certain that's not what happened. I've always heard people say they "dropped their patients off".
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What are you talking about? I don't understand your response to a statement I never made. Please clarify.
 
Ok, to expand on what Sasha said...

There's a bit of an overreaction here. And personally, I'm sick of people posting comments about this not being the proper profession for her. That is completely unnecessary. That might even be true. However, what was posted is NOTHING NEAR the level to which members of this forum should be acting so aggressively towards her. I'd like to consider this as a friendly forum, but there was NOTHING diplomatic or helpful about the responses to someone who is 1. new 2. seeking advice. I know some of you are frustrated with the current state of EMS. I understand that there are people out there that are in the profession for the wrong reasons or have unreasonable expectations. However, the OP is not one of those people. This is not someone who doesn't have compassion. This is someone that is NEW. This is someone that is learning. Instead of suggesting she look into something else, give advice, diplomatically inform her that it's part of the job.

Personally, I'm glad I didn't join this forum while I was still in school. This is not a very friendly forum at times. I know a lot of the older members believe in tough love and all that bit, but there needs to be some diplomacy. I sometimes wonder why many members post once and then disappear, but then I remember just how intimidating it can be at times. Sure, some people need a reality check. But can we try not to completely demolish their spirits while doing so? Again, there is nothing she said that suggests to me that she's in the wrong profession. It suggests to me that she has some learning yet to do, and members of this forum could help if in a slightly more respectful manner.
 
That was done, numerous times! It just didn't sink in.
 
Hastings said:
Ok, to expand on what Sasha said...

There's a bit of an overreaction here. And personally, I'm sick of people posting comments about this not being the proper profession for her. That is completely unnecessary. That might even be true. However, what was posted is NOTHING NEAR the level to which members of this forum should be acting so aggressively towards her. I'd like to consider this as a friendly forum, but there was NOTHING diplomatic or helpful about the responses to someone who is 1. new 2. seeking advice. I know some of you are frustrated with the current state of EMS. I understand that there are people out there that are in the profession for the wrong reasons or have unreasonable expectations. However, the OP is not one of those people. This is not someone who doesn't have compassion. This is someone that is NEW. This is someone that is learning. Instead of suggesting she look into something else, give advice, diplomatically inform her that it's part of the job.

Personally, I'm glad I didn't join this forum while I was still in school. This is not a very friendly forum at times. I know a lot of the older members believe in tough love and all that bit, but there needs to be some diplomacy. I sometimes wonder why many members post once and then disappear, but then I remember just how intimidating it can be at times. Sure, some people need a reality check. But can we try not to completely demolish their spirits while doing so? Again, there is nothing she said that suggests to me that she's in the wrong profession. It suggests to me that she has some learning yet to do, and members of this forum could help if in a slightly more respectful manner.
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There was a reason I haven't responded to this thread yet but I've been following it closely hoping that it would get back on track.

Yes, some of the posts/comments were very close to crossing the line but none actually did (IMHO). However, I do believe it's time to give this thread a 24 hour time out to allow everyone a chance to reassess things and cool off a bit.

lock.gif
for 24 hours.
 
I've re-opened the thread.

Remember:
signadmin1.gif
 
Hastings said:
Ok, to expand on what Sasha said...

There's a bit of an overreaction here. And personally, I'm sick of people posting comments about this not being the proper profession for her. That is completely unnecessary. That might even be true. However, what was posted is NOTHING NEAR the level to which members of this forum should be acting so aggressively towards her. I'd like to consider this as a friendly forum, but there was NOTHING diplomatic or helpful about the responses to someone who is 1. new 2. seeking advice. I know some of you are frustrated with the current state of EMS. I understand that there are people out there that are in the profession for the wrong reasons or have unreasonable expectations. However, the OP is not one of those people. This is not someone who doesn't have compassion. This is someone that is NEW. This is someone that is learning. Instead of suggesting she look into something else, give advice, diplomatically inform her that it's part of the job.

Personally, I'm glad I didn't join this forum while I was still in school. This is not a very friendly forum at times. I know a lot of the older members believe in tough love and all that bit, but there needs to be some diplomacy. I sometimes wonder why many members post once and then disappear, but then I remember just how intimidating it can be at times. Sure, some people need a reality check. But can we try not to completely demolish their spirits while doing so? Again, there is nothing she said that suggests to me that she's in the wrong profession. It suggests to me that she has some learning yet to do, and members of this forum could help if in a slightly more respectful manner.
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If I came across rough.. so be it. We have to much "touchy, feely, sensitive" feelings to those that plan to enter the profession and workplace. When did it change that this profession was for everyone?

Sorry, I personally would advise any student to seriously consider entering a profession when this is part of and demand of the job. By not informing would be injustice not just to her but the profession and future patients.

If this was posted by a CNA in a nursing home, I am sure that the replies would be more brutal. can one imagine reading a statement of "OMG, my patient touched me!" Then to continue informing on how they have personal issues in regards to being touched. Nothing wrong with that, but being in the people and touchy business, one has to expect being touched and touching back. Again, as repeatedly posted, its part of the job.

I much rather blast someone on the forum and inform them, and hope that they will re-consider their actions and future than to enter only to drop out because they could not handle it. Yes, its that serious especially with other actions and discussion. It is the reason that all students should be informed of the job demands as well as be properly screened.
Would it cause an increase in shortage.. so what? I much rather have those that are suited for the job, than those that will only take up space and attempt at the job.

Somewhere we lost the ability to be honest with each other. Not everyone is cut out for this job, as other professions have demands that not everyone can perform also. It is NOT being rude, or mean just another form of us caring enough, we want the best for everyone.

R/r911
 
touchy touchy, its not about you, its about the pt, get out of our profession you heartless....check

more education and critical thinking skills.....check

textbook and protocols vs guidelines.....check

don't run ekg on DOA.....check

local dnr clarifications......check

finale: rid gives us some straight talk so we can do some soul searching and we’re all a little better off for it……check




She has now run her predictable course, lock this baby down for good jon.
 
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IMHO this is a good time to educate. Granted submitter came across in an unusual way but, the "OMG's" and the "!!!!" may be just a generational way of talking. Seriously. One of my old partners made a habit of "O-M-G'ding" everything from taking out the stretcher to traffic. But, she was a hell of a paramedic. :)

As I stated in a previous post there are many reasons a patient may grab someones knee: a need for comfort, fear, anxiety or simply because of your position relative to the stretcher. People do have their boundaries and although I don't agree with submitter, she (or he) does have options. Here are a few:
1) Sit at the head of the stretcher
2) give the patient a "bunkie" (or blanket) to hang on to
3) if the patient grabs your knee hold their hand instead
4) if you don't want to hold their hand pat their arm...

if none of these options appeal to submitter than he (or she) may wish to reevaluate their reasons for being in the profession or seek advice from their supervisor.
 
Flight-LP said:
Just wait until you get the happy drunk patient. Touching your leg will be the least of your concerns................................

BTW - Ummmm, hospice pts. typically go to hospice for one reason and one reason only; to die. With this knowledge in mind, why would one even ask the case worker if the pt. could possibly "conk". Of course she could, will that change you transporting, not in the least bit. I would probably be a little annoyed too if I were the case worker.......................
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Haha... i'll have to agree with that. I've had wayyy too many of those "happy" drunks, lol. "Are you in any pain tonight?" "No, but I'm horny." ... cute, huh? I love when I'm working w/ a guy and they'll make up a lie, like, they're my fiance, or b/f... like it'll actually make the drunk keep his mouth shut and his hands to himself. Honestly, I'm just used to it now. I don't think I'd mind an old woman putting her hand on my knee... maybe next time, it would be better to just actually hold her hand if she just needed comfort.

And yes... I def. agree w/ the second part of what this quote says. They've already thought about all that... they don't care... they just need this woman transported. My philosophy: I get paid by the hour... I do what they say, when they say it, and that's that.
 
This reminds me of a Facebook group I saw the other day. It was titled "I tried to make out with the EMT when I was taken to the ER for alcohol poisoning".

There was a thread on the group forum, started by the girl whose antics had resulted in the creation of the group. She had posted: "Ahem... I did not try to make out with the EMT, I -Did- make out with him, activated charcoal mustache and all."

It got a good laugh out of me.
 
your job when transporting the pt is to keep them comfortable. if they are a hospice pt then this is especially important. if they want to keep their hand on your knee and it keeps them comfortable then let it happen. it doesnt hurt you in any way so why let it bother you
 
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