Dumbest thing heard on the radio
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traumaluv2011
Forum Lieutenant
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That guy needs a cup of coffee...
Meursault
Organic Mechanic
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BLS crew: A-16, we're clear, Boston ALS showed up and they have... patient triaged to ALS.
Dispatch: A-16, I have you clear, you did all the work, Boston ALS has the patient. Typical.
BLS crew: *two people laughing uncontrollably, Boston's radio traffic in the background*
Dispatch: Did they at least say thank you?
Dispatch: A-16, I have you clear, you did all the work, Boston ALS has the patient. Typical.
BLS crew: *two people laughing uncontrollably, Boston's radio traffic in the background*
Dispatch: Did they at least say thank you?
RESCUE 1: R1 to Hospital, we are en-route.... with a 40 year old male who has "choked on his chicken"
Hospital: <stiffled laughter> Rescue 1, could you repeat that please <less than stiffled laughter>
Rescue 1: "He choked on his chicken"
<add a redicoulous Down East Maine accent to this for more of a feel.....>
Hospital: <stiffled laughter> Rescue 1, could you repeat that please <less than stiffled laughter>
Rescue 1: "He choked on his chicken"
<add a redicoulous Down East Maine accent to this for more of a feel.....>
TheLocalMedic
Grumpy Badger
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After giving a radio report about an assault victim...
Hospital: Did they deserve it?
Hospital: Did they deserve it?
jpregulman
Forum Crew Member
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Ha all the time!
We are on the same band as the police:
They have been dispatched to a "mustard alarm" at a restaurant
Sometimes the supervisor and dispatch will have a radio argument which is quite entertaining
My favorite was they were dispatched to a "person thrown out of a car" then it was a "gun thrown out of a car" then they got on scene and someone had thrown some trash out the window, LOL! :rofl:
We are on the same band as the police:
They have been dispatched to a "mustard alarm" at a restaurant
Sometimes the supervisor and dispatch will have a radio argument which is quite entertaining
My favorite was they were dispatched to a "person thrown out of a car" then it was a "gun thrown out of a car" then they got on scene and someone had thrown some trash out the window, LOL! :rofl:
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Med 13 to XYZ FD: We'll be responding with you, about a 3 out.
XYZ FD Chief: You guys can go ahead and cancel.
Med 13: We're close enough, we'll come in anyway.
XYZ Chief: Ya I don't know why she called this time, he usually beats the $hit out of her way worse.
Wait what?
XYZ FD Chief: You guys can go ahead and cancel.
Med 13: We're close enough, we'll come in anyway.
XYZ Chief: Ya I don't know why she called this time, he usually beats the $hit out of her way worse.
Wait what?
Heard this one one night.
Dispatch: 19-8 respond to an ill 21 yo male at XXX. (This place is 40 miles out half paved road and the rest bumpy gravel.)
19-8: Responding with 2 on board.
19-8: Dispatch what is the nature of this call?
Dispatch: (Sheepish voice) PT is complaining of an upset stomach and is suffering from uncontrollable diaheria and projectile vomiting.
Long pause.
19-8: (Terse voice) Copy that dispatch.
Dispatch: 19-8 respond to an ill 21 yo male at XXX. (This place is 40 miles out half paved road and the rest bumpy gravel.)
19-8: Responding with 2 on board.
19-8: Dispatch what is the nature of this call?
Dispatch: (Sheepish voice) PT is complaining of an upset stomach and is suffering from uncontrollable diaheria and projectile vomiting.
Long pause.
19-8: (Terse voice) Copy that dispatch.
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Sounds like a pretty standard 911 call.
"Medic 38 you're going priority three for a fall that happened two weeks ago."
I hailed dispatch the other morning to sign in and she answered with "welcome to the jungle"... I thought about responding with "we've got fun and games" but I decided to not smile the fire that early in my shift.
Later that same shift we cleared from the ER and she's old me to post a street and intersection that isn't a post. The cross street had two other crosses that had posts on it. So I asked whether she would leke me to go to either x and y or x and z and she said yes please...it wasn't a yes or no question. I decided to just drive that way and I decided to post and x and y since it's a hard post with a TV, bathrooms, couches and really good blinds. Unfortunately there was already an ambo there so through my paramedical (credit to DEMedic for the term) powers of deduction and decided that she meant x and z which is a parking lot with a grocery store, a few sit down restaurants and a grocery store. At least I work days now so everything was open. When I worked nights that post was brutal...pretty sure that's the only post we have next to a gas station that isn't open 24 hours a day....
Chupathangy
Forum Crew Member
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One of my reports:
Me - "Hospital are you clear for a Mild/Med?"
MICN - "Be advised: We're on ED stat" (or something, I dont what its called)
Me - [Silence while trying to think what that means]
MICN - [Angrily] "Ambulance, did you get my last traffic?"
Me - "Ummmm. No?
MICN "I said we're on ED stat!"
Quickly ask my partner what that means. "I don't know!"
Me - [Sigh] "Ummm, I don't know what that means."
MICN - "It means we're busy! Give me age, sex ,c/c!"
I felt like an idiot, but I'd never heard that term used before. I'll never forget now though.
Me - "Hospital are you clear for a Mild/Med?"
MICN - "Be advised: We're on ED stat" (or something, I dont what its called)
Me - [Silence while trying to think what that means]
MICN - [Angrily] "Ambulance, did you get my last traffic?"
Me - "Ummmm. No?
MICN "I said we're on ED stat!"
Quickly ask my partner what that means. "I don't know!"
Me - [Sigh] "Ummm, I don't know what that means."
MICN - "It means we're busy! Give me age, sex ,c/c!"
I felt like an idiot, but I'd never heard that term used before. I'll never forget now though.
adamjh3
Forum Culinary Powerhouse
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ED Sat. Short for Emergency Department Saturation. They'll also just call it "bypass."
I'm gonna take a wild guess and say you were trying to go to Grossmont?
Chupathangy
Forum Crew Member
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Wow! I guess that's really no secret though is it?
MountainMedic
Forum Probie
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Medic: "I'm calling for a field pronunciation."
MD Med Control: "FIELD." (Hangs up)
MD Med Control: "FIELD." (Hangs up)
I was on call the other day and heard another department get dispatched to a MVA on the interstate. Everybody shows up on scene to find no injuries but one mangled looking vehicle so within 30 minutes fire and ems got to leave except engine 3 who was block lane 1. The last conversation to engine 3 went something like this:
Rescue 1: Engine 3 we are going to be leaving the scene officer on scene wants you to remain in blocking position.
Engine 3: 10-4 Rescue 1, can you ask PD if we have permission to throw stuff at vehicle that don't slow down?
Rescue 1:....
Rescue 1: Engine 3 we are going to be leaving the scene officer on scene wants you to remain in blocking position.
Engine 3: 10-4 Rescue 1, can you ask PD if we have permission to throw stuff at vehicle that don't slow down?
Rescue 1:....
d0nk3yk0n9
Forum Crew Member
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First Response Unit: Incoming ambulance from XXXX on Med B
... 1 minute of awkward silence
First Response Unit: Dispatch from XXXX, can you dispatch an ambulance to our location.
... 1 minute of awkward silence
First Response Unit: Dispatch from XXXX, can you dispatch an ambulance to our location.
CPRinProgress
Forum Lieutenant
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Dispatch: EMS and fire respond for MVA possible rollover w/ entrapment.
PD unit: arriving on scene
Dispatch: receive
Pd: all fire units and als responding can stand down negative injuries, can we have a first responder respond fr an RMA pt sitting on sidewalk
First Responder: dispatch can you re-dispatch all units, person on sidewalk is a bystander, pt still in vehicle with entrapment.
Dispatch: received
PD unit: arriving on scene
Dispatch: receive
Pd: all fire units and als responding can stand down negative injuries, can we have a first responder respond fr an RMA pt sitting on sidewalk
First Responder: dispatch can you re-dispatch all units, person on sidewalk is a bystander, pt still in vehicle with entrapment.
Dispatch: received
:lol:
TheLocalMedic
Grumpy Badger
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Open mike moments are occasionally pretty funny.
Last week there was this awful buzzing on the radio and dispatch kept breaking through to announce an open mike. After about five announcements over a few minutes the buzzing finally quit.
Dispatch: Thank God!
Last week there was this awful buzzing on the radio and dispatch kept breaking through to announce an open mike. After about five announcements over a few minutes the buzzing finally quit.
Dispatch: Thank God!
DesertMedic66
Forum Troll
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I've heard a lot more than I needed to on an open mic on dispatches end.