New EMT and Pregnant?

[kansasems597]

It looks as if I am likely pregnant (blatantly positive home test but no blood test yet). My husband and I were 100% preventing, careful and consistent, and absolutely did NOT want this right now. This was seriously a 1 in 100 chance. However, I don’t believe in abortion and so am going through with it.

Well, big problem is that I start academy with AMR next week and will be working full time. I’m only 4.5 weeks along so can hide it but not sure if I should considering the type of job this is. I’m extremely fit and healthy and with my first child I was allowed by my doctor to do everything I wanted, including continuing with weight living. Our city is also not all too large or dangerous. I know I could handle it.

I just feel like I will face massive amounts of judgment for this and will never live it down. I’ll always be the new kid who showed up knocked up. This is my dream job so I cannot imagine not going through with academy and starting on the streets later this month.

How should I handle this?

 

[PotatoMedic]

Talk to HR. The main issue is you might not get FMLA so you might have to quit and re apply after you are ready to work again. If you tell them and they fire you, that is unlawful termination so you have that going for you!

 

[Peak]

What do you value more, being in EMS or caring what your coworkers think about you? Will you reasonable have another opportunity to start as a new EMT with no experience and several months to years since your initial certification?

Honestly, it isn't your employer's business if you are a month pregnant, many people don't know that they are pregnant until they are 2-3 months in. It may be against the law to fire someone for being pregnant but I also wouldn't trust them to not find some other reason to let you go, they are a private for profit after all.

 

[kansasems597]

Talk to HR. The main issue is you might not get FMLA so you might have to quit and re apply after you are ready to work again. If you tell them and they fire you, that is unlawful termination so you have that going for you!

I would probably only qualify for a 6 week medical leave which I understand. They can’t really fire me for that but since I’ll be in training/FTO phase for almost a month they can fire me for any reason really. I think I should wait until after that for sure. I just really worry about the social backlash for this.

 

[kansasems597]

What do you value more, being in EMS or caring what your coworkers think about you? Will you reasonable have another opportunity to start as a new EMT with no experience and several months to years since your initial certification?

Honestly, it isn't your employer's business if you are a month pregnant, many people don't know that they are pregnant until they are 2-3 months in. It may be against the law to fire someone for being pregnant but I also wouldn't trust them to not find some other reason to let you go, they are a private for profit after all.

Well, absolutely my job. I simply don’t know how to handle the social aspect of a situation like this with a job I’ve never experienced before. I think I should at least until FTO phase is over and all of that is taken care of. I don’t trust them to not let me go for another “reason” during a probationary period if I told them.

 

[mgr22]

Kansasems597, maybe I'm just old and out of touch with cultural trends, but what "social aspects" are you concerned about?

 

[DrParasite]

1) you don't know for sure if you are pregnant.... go to your doctor and confirm
2) it's no ones business if you are pregnant or not. If you are able to do the job, and your doctor signs off on you doing the job, do the job. But by month 7, people are going to start talking about you getting pretty big around the midsection.... I know people in EMS might not be known as the sharpest, but they will suspect something.
3) you showed up to the new job knocked up. you won't be the first, and you won't be the last. what's the big deal?
4) what social backlash? AMR is a huge company. and you are pregnant, not a drug abuser. you are worried too much about what others will think when they learn you are pregnant.
5) if you can do the job, do the job. if you can't do the job, that's a different story.
6) get through academy. once you do that, get through probationary period. don't take any time off, no vacation time, and save it up for when the baby comes. then use it to spend as much time as you can with your little poop machine, who will enjoy keeping you up at all hours of the night.

I think your more worried about this than you need to be.

 

[kansasems597]

Kansasems597, maybe I'm just old and out of touch with cultural trends, but what "social aspects" are you concerned about?

I can understand the confusion. My area of service is very traditional. Men (it is mostly men) do not want women in the service and are very obvious about it. A local woman actually had to file a lawsuit recently and it was taken to federal court last week.

 

[kansasems597]

1) you don't know for sure if you are pregnant.... go to your doctor and confirm
2) it's no ones business if you are pregnant or not. If you are able to do the job, and your doctor signs off on you doing the job, do the job. But by month 7, people are going to start talking about you getting pretty big around the midsection.... I know people in EMS might not be known as the sharpest, but they will suspect something.
3) you showed up to the new job knocked up. you won't be the first, and you won't be the last. what's the big deal?
4) what social backlash? AMR is a huge company. and you are pregnant, not a drug abuser. you are worried too much about what others will think when they learn you are pregnant.
5) if you can do the job, do the job. if you can't do the job, that's a different story.
6) get through academy. once you do that, get through probationary period. don't take any time off, no vacation time, and save it up for when the baby comes. then use it to spend as much time as you can with your little poop machine, who will enjoy keeping you up at all hours of the night.

I think your more worried about this than you need to be.

I think the two bright pink lines are telling enough ha.

I can see all your points. Around here, being a woman is bad enough, especially with all of the older employees. It’s extremely sexist, and most of the guys I know have specifically said they don’t want to work with a woman in the first place. I’m sure it would die down eventually. I more so worry about being fired simply because of an unplanned pregnancy the first couple months of being there. I typically have more of a “f*ck what other people think” mindset, but considering I do not have much experience in the field, I do not know if my job could be in jeopardy.

 

[mgr22]

I can understand the confusion. My area of service is very traditional. Men (it is mostly men) do not want women in the service and are very obvious about it. A local woman actually had to file a lawsuit recently and it was taken to federal court last week.

Ok. I think that attitude is unusual for EMS these days, unless it's fire-based EMS. I suppose anyone facing extreme gender-based bias at work has to decide how worthwhile it is fighting that fight.

Your coworkers aren't prejudiced against babies, are they? I mean, wouldn't you be facing just as much anti-female bias if you weren't pregnant?

 

[Seirende]

Saying that you'll always be "the new kid who showed up knocked up" to me sounds like you're worried about being judged for having a unplanned pregnancy? Would you be similarily concerned if this was a pregnancy that you had anticipated? Obviously there's absolutely no shame in being pregnant and if your coworkers think otherwise, that's on them. Preparing to welcome a new child is enough to handle without giving a **** about what anyone thinks. A lot of people don't start spreading the word about a pregnancy until after the first trimester, anyway, and from what you're saying you should be cleared from probation by then.

 

[DrParasite]

I think the two bright pink lines are telling enough ha.

you are aware that those tests aren't 100% accurate right? IIRC, they look for protein in your urine, and can have false positives. This is why your OB gets paid the big bucks.

I more so worry about being fired simply because of an unplanned pregnancy the first couple months of being there.

I'm no lawyer, but I'm pretty sure you can't be fired for having an unplanned pregnancy. Provided you are able to do the job as expected of you (which is between you and your doctor, no one else). And it's a PR nightmare.

Wait until you through the first trimester before you tell anyone at work. That's just good practice.

And make sure you get plenty of cute future EMS onsies for the baby to wear when you bring the little poop machine with you to show off at work.

 

[akflightmedic]

you are aware that those tests aren't 100% accurate right? IIRC, they look for protein in your urine, and can have false positives.

Isn't 99% accurate good enough? And it is exceptionally rare to have a false positive...the test looks for hCG which is present when pregnant. You can have false negatives, however a false positive is rare.

***You could have a false-positive result if blood or protein is present in your urine. And certain drugs, such as tranquilizers, anti-convulsants, or hypnotics, may also cause false-positive results.

 

[Peak]

you are aware that those tests aren't 100% accurate right? IIRC, they look for protein in your urine, and can have false positives. This is why your OB gets paid the big bucks.

Isn't 99% accurate good enough? And it is exceptionally rare to have a false positive...the test looks for hCG which is present when pregnant. You can have false negatives, however a false positive is rare.

***You could have a false-positive result if blood or protein is present in your urine. And certain drugs, such as tranquilizers, anti-convulsants, or hypnotics, may also cause false-positive results.

You would have to look up the individual manufacturers test for the interferences, but urine pregnancy have relatively few interferances and false positives and negatives are very rare. Most false negatives are related to early pregnancy (typically before 21 days, especially with dilute urine) or very late if the test is actually testing for hcg antibodies. Most false positives are related to endocrine or metastatic disease.

Blood quantitative bHCG testing is more accurate, interferances are still possible and depend on testing methodology but are still incredibly rare.