My gf is having our baby, should I deliver?

[bulletprooftiger]

I'm an emt b and my girl friend is going to have our daughter any day now should I help assist our OB with delivery (she said she would let me.) but I'm fresh in the feild and kinda green, should I take this as a learning experiance or will I never look at my girlfriend the same?

 

[epipusher]

host then post

 

[MrBrown]

Uh no how about not

 

[tiffany9902]

i dont think you would look at her the same again... but lets you know how it goes if/when you do lol

 

[Handsome Robb]

If i ever get married and have kids, I'm paying for a c-section.

Ever seen a delivery?

 

[tiffany9902]

i had 3 c-section i am not a fan of natural lol

 

[systemet]

I'm an emt b and my girl friend is going to have our daughter any day now should I help assist our OB with delivery (she said she would let me.) but I'm fresh in the feild and kinda green, should I take this as a learning experiance or will I never look at my girlfriend the same?

I wouldn't / didn't. And as it turns out wouldn't have been able to, as my daughter required a vacuum extraction, and was a nucchal cord, and was flat. It was tough enough that the mid-wives (which here are RNs with graduate training), passed the case over to an obstetrician, which is a relatively infrequent event.

I realised my role was to be there for my wife. She didn't need me distracted, trying to do something else. There were plenty of other people who were better trained. I was just going to be in the way.

I'm not saying don't ask questions, or have an interest in what's happening, but your girlfriend is going to need a lot of support. Good luck!

 

[katgrl2003]

Uh no how about not

Says the guy that wanted to deliver my baby if we ever got pregnant.

 

[Melclin]

HOLY GOD NO.

Mate, watch a delivery on you tube and get back to us. Its a massacre down there. You don't ever wanna see you're missus' play ground depicted in that light. Honestly, from one bloke to another. Don't do it.

Aside from the gross factor, I imagine bother her you looking at her in a clinical way. You're there for emotional support, I'd stick with that.

 

[abckidsmom]

Or it could be really cool for you and her both. For being this late in the game, I am thinking the right answer is no, but just in case some other person is reading along, it doesn't have to be some big deal scary and disgusting medical thing...it could be just catching your baby, and being impressed with her- ahem- versatility in that area.

Only you and she can make this call. Good luck!

 

[medic417]

Why not? In the old days she would go out in the bushes by herself and deliver with no help so I don't really see any way even an emt could get in the way. Any complications the doc will kick you out of the way.

 

[Melclin]

Why not? In the old days she would go out in the bushes by herself and deliver with no help so I don't really see any way even an emt could get in the way. Any complications the doc will kick you out of the way.

Don't listen to him bulletprooftiger, ITS A TRAP!

That delivery room is a fully operational battle station.

 

[usalsfyre]

Ehhh, I watched both mine and it hasn't affected "other" areas of our relationship. You don't really remember that part anyway. Two thoughts.

1). As somebody else noted, you may be more "useful" to your girlfriend elsewhere during the delivery.

2). abckidsmom will probably disagree, but is this taking place in a hospital? Wife had a complicated first delivery, and speaking personally, I know just enough about OB complications that home birth scares the crap out of me.

 

[systemet]

Or it could be really cool for you and her both. For being this late in the game, I am thinking the right answer is no, but just in case some other person is reading along, it doesn't have to be some big deal scary and disgusting medical thing...it could be just catching your baby, and being impressed with her- ahem- versatility in that area.

Only you and she can make this call. Good luck!

And this is a valid point too. I just want to echo that it's a personal choice. I wouldn't feel comfortable doing this, and didn't want to, and don't want to with future pregnancies. It's not to say that a different decision might not be just fine for OP and his girlfriend.

I also agree with usalsfyre regarding home birth. I have a very close friend / surrogate parental figure, who's done hundreds of home births as a registered midwife in the UK [Where the midwives have real training]. Most of the time it's routine and problem-free. Properly trained mid-wives are fantastic, and are able to take care of routine births with comparable or even better results than physicians. But if there's ever a complication, I'd want to be in the hospital.

My beautiful daughter, who almost required a c-section, might not be here if I'd elected to do a home birth, so I'm a little biased / opinioniated when it comes to this subject

On a lighter note, I gained so much more respect for the female sex after my wife delivered. It's like the ultimate pulling a rabbit out of a hat trick.

 

[abckidsmom]

Ehhh, I watched both mine and it hasn't affected "other" areas of our relationship. You don't really remember that part anyway. Two thoughts.

1). As somebody else noted, you may be more "useful" to your girlfriend elsewhere during the delivery.

2). abckidsmom will probably disagree, but is this taking place in a hospital? Wife had a complicated first delivery, and speaking personally, I know just enough about OB complications that home birth scares the crap out of me.

I only support educated, well-thought-out, attended home births. The mention of the OB makes me think it is not. I do not know of any OBs that do homebirths on purpose.

 

[akflightmedic]

Meh, I disagree on the male psyche trauma...kind of childish actually since we are all in the medical field anyways.

I "assisted" with all 3 of my kids deliveries, I cut the cord on each one, and I was the first to hold them (ruined 3 shirts). My 3rd one was the one I actually got to hold and assist on her way out as our OB knew us quite well by then and was ok allowing this.

Yes, its a mess and it is amazing watching "my toybox" absolutely get stretched beyond belief but the crazy thing is...it has not prevented me from going back.

I would never do it any other way, it was a truly great experience watching my child enter the world and being a part of that. I guess I am also lucky that I do not have a whiney wife either. I coached her just fine from down below, talked to her in calm tones and gave her all the support she needed.

If you have the opportunity, I would absolutely recommend you catch, watch, do whatever possible to be a part of it.

For any male who says don't do it-ignore them, this is just part of the lifelong male insecurity issue we all seem to have about penis size. We like to think we are more than one can handle and then are dismayed when a watermelon pops out...we can't help but be scared on some primal level that it will never be the same for us or her.

 

[ArcticKat]

There is no way I would have wanted to deliver my 4 kids. My wife was the one who needed my support, not my children. There were other people for that. I've assisted the mother in a dozen deliveries over my carreer, I wasn't that desperate to get a few more.

It doesn't matter who delivered the baby, the kids will never know or care.

It is a good way to get some experience though, I'm just surprised the OB said you could do it. I've never met one yet who was willing to risk his or her carreer like that.

 

[akflightmedic]

There is no way I would have wanted to deliver my 4 kids. My wife was the one who needed my support, not my children. There were other people for that. I've assisted the mother in a dozen deliveries over my carreer, I wasn't that desperate to get a few more.

It doesn't matter who delivered the baby, the kids will never know or care.

It is a good way to get some experience though, I'm just surprised the OB said you could do it. I've never met one yet who was willing to risk his or her carreer like that.

It isn't about the kids...and they may care one day when they are older, care in the sense of how neat their Dad thought it was.

It is all about this being something I helped create. Why would I not be a part of the "final pregnancy act"? To me it is all about finishing what I started, plus I think it is fascinating.

But like I said, I have a strong wife totally unlike most of the other deliveries I have been a part of.

 

[Aidey]

You said it yourself though, you ruined 3 shirts. You were not the guy in the gown, gloves and mask calling the shots. I think there is a big difference between being involved and cutting the cord and actually doing the delivery yourself.

 

[mycrofft]

Been there done that.

Probably they will not let you shoulder in on the OB. If you both want it and have taken the classes (childbirth, not EMT), be there for her, and once the delivery is done, they will present your new kid for you both to see. I got to cut my second kid's cord once they had tied it off.

If you bring a camera, Mom gets final cut on the editing.