Annoying partner

xoayn

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I seriously cannot tolerate my partner sometimes. We run IFT and he is literally a rookie rescue not sure if that’s the word but he literally will rush through every call and let dispatch run us to the ground. He’s those self righteous Christians and he likes to pretend he’s innocent and holy than the next. If I take a while to fill out any paper work or take vitals he’ll tap his foot which pisses me off. He’s overly paranoid about getting in trouble he thinks the camera is recording us 24/7. He says racist comments once in awhile and I honestly feel like he’s having an identity crisis. He complains that he has to take the heavier side of the patient when he’s literally a dude and I’m a female. Obviously I’m not as strong as he is. He’s made me hurt my back multiple times. He’s so impatient one time I was moving my car for him to park there and he backed up without me and crashed into another rig I had to help him squeeze out and cover both our asses. He’s rude af I’ll be talking to him and he’ll have his headphones in. He lll text his gf while driving and will literally put both our jobs on the line cuz he has to text his gf right that very moment. The camera has gone off multiple times saying distracted. I can’t stand him I can’t I miss my old partner. This guy is just ****ing dumb. I’m sure he can say the same about me but I dread going to work sometimes
 

Fezman92

NJ and PA EMT
497
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28
if you’re looking for advice, I’d say start documenting this stuff and then report him.
 

Fezman92

NJ and PA EMT
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100
28
Also he’s putting everyone’s safety at risk.
 

Tigger

Dodges Pucks
Community Leader
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If he’s recorded driving and texting, then tell your supervisor. The end. Also don’t cover for people that back without a spotter and hit stuff.

Address stuff like an adult. “I don’t like when you do this, if you keep doing this, there’ll be an issue.”
 

EpiEMS

Forum Deputy Chief
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You shouldn’t have to tolerate unsafe conditions or racism on the job. I’m sorry you have experienced that - I’d suggest talking to a supervisor ASAP.
 

Rubicon Bob

Forum Crew Member
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Every situation has 3 sides - Your side, his side, the truth.

From what you wrote I get the idea that you don't like to do work, while he is willing to do work.

The way you describe him tells me a whole lot more about you.

I've worked with partners like you before, I don't miss any of them.
 

Tigger

Dodges Pucks
Community Leader
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Every situation has 3 sides - Your side, his side, the truth.

From what you wrote I get the idea that you don't like to do work, while he is willing to do work.

The way you describe him tells me a whole lot more about you.

I've worked with partners like you before, I don't miss any of them.
But yea, texting or wearing headphones and driving is cool. Or racist comments, yea just part of the job.
 

CCCSD

Forum Deputy Chief
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I seriously cannot tolerate my partner sometimes. We run IFT and he is literally a rookie rescue not sure if that’s the word but he literally will rush through every call and let dispatch run us to the ground. He’s those self righteous Christians and he likes to pretend he’s innocent and holy than the next. If I take a while to fill out any paper work or take vitals he’ll tap his foot which pisses me off. He’s overly paranoid about getting in trouble he thinks the camera is recording us 24/7. He says racist comments once in awhile and I honestly feel like he’s having an identity crisis. He complains that he has to take the heavier side of the patient when he’s literally a dude and I’m a female. Obviously I’m not as strong as he is. He’s made me hurt my back multiple times. He’s so impatient one time I was moving my car for him to park there and he backed up without me and crashed into another rig I had to help him squeeze out and cover both our asses. He’s rude af I’ll be talking to him and he’ll have his headphones in. He lll text his gf while driving and will literally put both our jobs on the line cuz he has to text his gf right that very moment. The camera has gone off multiple times saying distracted. I can’t stand him I can’t I miss my old partner. This guy is just ****ing dumb. I’m sure he can say the same about me but I dread going to work sometimes
I detect certain biases on the part of the OP and an entitlement attitude.
 

VentMonkey

Family Guy
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Someone will offend someone for something in life somewhere at some point in time. Over. And. Over. And. Over.

I’m sure tired of it. Also, this thread seems like click baiting by the OP.

Since we’re sharing opinions however, grow thicker skin. The end.
 

ffemt8978

Forum Vice-Principal
Community Leader
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Someone will offend someone for something in life somewhere at some point in time. Over. And. Over. And. Over.

I’m sure tired of it. Also, this thread seems like click baiting by the OP.

Since we’re sharing opinions however, grow thicker skin. The end.
Sure seems like now days people go out their way to find reasons to be offended so they can complain about it to anyone they can get to listen (without ever addressing the problems with the source of their outrage)
 

akflightmedic

Forum Deputy Chief
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Xoayn “I seriously cannot tolerate my partner sometimes.”

-Learn to adult, in every job, not just EMS, you will have those you are annoyed by and do not want to work with. The thing about adulting is realizing not everyone is like you, you will not like everyone, everyone will not like you, yet you still need to find common ground in order to get the job done.

Xoayn “We run IFT and he is literally a rookie rescue not sure if that’s the word but he literally will rush through every call and let dispatch run us to the ground.”

-Not knowing the actual term kind of makes you sound “new” as well. The actual term is Ricky Rescue, and this term is used to describe the guy who has a bazillion items on his duty belt, a trunk or backseat of the car better stocked than the ambulance, pagers/gadgets, and lightbars with awesome siren on their personal vehicle. That pretty much is a Ricky Rescue.

What you described above, is someone who is driven, has integrity, and is possibly one of those “company men” who will not waste time, want to work, and always ask for more. Now if you mean he rushes by cutting corners, being rude, breaking laws, then that is a different issue. But working with a purpose and being cognizant of time, that is a problem only for the lazy and/or entitled.

Xoayn “He’s those self righteous Christians and he likes to pretend he’s innocent and holy than the next.”

-Well yeh, I agree that can be super annoying. I am an Atheist, was born that way (as we all were). I did a few side steps here and there, but always returned to science, logic and the rational world. However, as I said in my very first comment, you have to learn to work with ALL types of people and their belief or lack of. Is he pretending? Maybe you get that perception, however in his reality, there is no pretending. If you have not learned anything in the last 5 years between Trump and Covid, there is strong cognitive bias within many people. They do not see their hypocrisy or have issue with it.

Xoayn “If I take a while to fill out any paper work or take vitals he’ll tap his foot which pisses me off.”

-This is where you adult. “Hey X, I am working on my report right now. I understand you are much faster, however I must work at my pace to ensure accuracy. Standing there tapping your foot only slows me down, so please go elsewhere and I will come find you when I am finished”.

There, simple, direct, transparent communication. You identify the problem, you communicate it a non-offensive way, you establish a boundary, and you provide a solution. No need to be pissed off, if you would just communicate.

Xoayn “He’s overly paranoid about getting in trouble he thinks the camera is recording us 24/7.”

-In what way? I would be very, very careful if there were cameras in my truck. My conversations would be exceptionally limited, and behavior would be on point. But how and why is his paranoia bothering you?

Xoayn “He says racist comments once in awhile and I honestly feel like he’s having an identity crisis.”

-He must not be too paranoid if he drops these comments in the truck. If you do not like his comments, again this is where YOU adult. You say “X, I do not agree with that comment and while you may feel or think that way, please refrain from any future comments similar to that or I will need to take action”. Again, clear, direct communication with the expectation and the possible outcome.

As for the identity crisis, when did you take on the role of his therapist? It is NOT your job to think that about him, and allowing yourself to walk that path is only going to lead to more walls between the two of you instead of finding common ground to work together.

Xoayn “He complains that he has to take the heavier side of the patient when he’s literally a dude and I’m a female. Obviously I’m not as strong as he is. He’s made me hurt my back multiple times.”

-Well, does he? Because your reply of “being a girl” sure makes it sound that way. He has every right to complain if he is continuously on the heavy end. Being a girl is NOT a valid excuse. You both took the job with certain lifting expectations, and as partners, you need to be able to do the heavy lifting as well. If you have been getting by using that excuse prior to him, then shame on you. You need to hit the gym or practice lifting techniques. You would not last long as my partner if you always had the expectation of me doing the heavy lifting.

How has he made YOUR back hurt? Maybe, YOU have made HIS back hurt…but he has not complained or expressed it.

Xoayn “He’s so impatient one time I was moving my car for him to park there and he backed up without me and crashed into another rig I had to help him squeeze out and cover both our asses.”

-I do not understand this part. Why did you need to move your car for him to park an ambulance? Did you park someone that you should NOT have? Otherwise, it is hard to imagine why your car is occupying the only spot the ambulance can park in.

As for backing an ambulance without you spotting, if you have a company policy of always needing a spotter, then he is in the wrong. I absolutely would NOT support a partner who chooses to violate policy and damages property. Because as soon as the damaged party complains, or as soon as a witness emerges, or as soon as he or you tell anyone…it is no longer a secret and you both will be fired. And rightfully so. And why would you cover for someone you dislike so much??

Xoayn “He’s rude af I’ll be talking to him and he’ll have his headphones in. He lll text his gf while driving and will literally put both our jobs on the line cuz he has to text his gf right that very moment. The camera has gone off multiple times saying distracted.”

-Maybe you talk too much? When I fly, when I play poker, when I sit anywhere in public, I often put in earbuds or headphones so no one will talk to me. I have no music or anything going, I just do not want to be bothered.

As for the texting, again this is where YOU need to be an adult. Address the behavior immediately, set the expectation, and explain the outcome. “X, please do NOT text while driving. I will drive if you need to be on the phone that much, but not the entire shift. Or, you can pull over and text. However, if you continue to text while driving me around, I will report you.”

Xoayn “I can’t stand him I can’t I miss my old partner. This guy is just ****ing dumb. I’m sure he can say the same about me but I dread going to work sometimes”

-Maybe THIS last statement of yours is the real crux of the problem. You had a good partner. One that did all the lifting, did not text, kept a slow pace same as you, and engaged in conversation. And then it ended. That will happen, again and again in every aspect of life. You sound quite young and inexperienced in general. You call him dumb and admit your own dumb-ness. Dreading going to work is a daily event for many people, suck it up. LIFE.
 
OP
OP
xoayn

xoayn

Forum Probie
10
0
1
I seriously cannot tolerate my partner sometimes. We run IFT and he is literally a rookie rescue not sure if that’s the word but he literally will rush through every call and let dispatch run us to the ground. He’s those self righteous Christians and he likes to pretend he’s innocent and holy than the next. If I take a while to fill out any paper work or take vitals he’ll tap his foot which pisses me off. He’s overly paranoid about getting in trouble he thinks the camera is recording us 24/7. He says racist comments once in awhile and I honestly feel like he’s having an identity crisis. He complains that he has to take the heavier side of the patient when he’s literally a dude and I’m a female. Obviously I’m not as strong as he is. He’s made me hurt my back multiple times. He’s so impatient one time I was moving my car for him to park there and he backed up without me and crashed into another rig I had to help him squeeze out and cover both our asses. He’s rude af I’ll be talking to him and he’ll have his headphones in. He lll text his gf while driving and will literally put both our jobs on the line cuz he has to text his gf right that very moment. The camera has gone off multiple times saying distracted. I can’t stand him I can’t I miss my old partner. This guy is just ****ing dumb. I’m sure he can say the same about me but I dread going to work sometimes
Both 😩 lol
 
OP
OP
xoayn

xoayn

Forum Probie
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1
Xoayn “I seriously cannot tolerate my partner sometimes.”

-Learn to adult, in every job, not just EMS, you will have those you are annoyed by and do not want to work with. The thing about adulting is realizing not everyone is like you, you will not like everyone, everyone will not like you, yet you still need to find common ground in order to get the job done.

Xoayn “We run IFT and he is literally a rookie rescue not sure if that’s the word but he literally will rush through every call and let dispatch run us to the ground.”

-Not knowing the actual term kind of makes you sound “new” as well. The actual term is Ricky Rescue, and this term is used to describe the guy who has a bazillion items on his duty belt, a trunk or backseat of the car better stocked than the ambulance, pagers/gadgets, and lightbars with awesome siren on their personal vehicle. That pretty much is a Ricky Rescue.

What you described above, is someone who is driven, has integrity, and is possibly one of those “company men” who will not waste time, want to work, and always ask for more. Now if you mean he rushes by cutting corners, being rude, breaking laws, then that is a different issue. But working with a purpose and being cognizant of time, that is a problem only for the lazy and/or entitled.

Xoayn “He’s those self righteous Christians and he likes to pretend he’s innocent and holy than the next.”

-Well yeh, I agree that can be super annoying. I am an Atheist, was born that way (as we all were). I did a few side steps here and there, but always returned to science, logic and the rational world. However, as I said in my very first comment, you have to learn to work with ALL types of people and their belief or lack of. Is he pretending? Maybe you get that perception, however in his reality, there is no pretending. If you have not learned anything in the last 5 years between Trump and Covid, there is strong cognitive bias within many people. They do not see their hypocrisy or have issue with it.

Xoayn “If I take a while to fill out any paper work or take vitals he’ll tap his foot which pisses me off.”

-This is where you adult. “Hey X, I am working on my report right now. I understand you are much faster, however I must work at my pace to ensure accuracy. Standing there tapping your foot only slows me down, so please go elsewhere and I will come find you when I am finished”.

There, simple, direct, transparent communication. You identify the problem, you communicate it a non-offensive way, you establish a boundary, and you provide a solution. No need to be pissed off, if you would just communicate.

Xoayn “He’s overly paranoid about getting in trouble he thinks the camera is recording us 24/7.”

-In what way? I would be very, very careful if there were cameras in my truck. My conversations would be exceptionally limited, and behavior would be on point. But how and why is his paranoia bothering you?

Xoayn “He says racist comments once in awhile and I honestly feel like he’s having an identity crisis.”

-He must not be too paranoid if he drops these comments in the truck. If you do not like his comments, again this is where YOU adult. You say “X, I do not agree with that comment and while you may feel or think that way, please refrain from any future comments similar to that or I will need to take action”. Again, clear, direct communication with the expectation and the possible outcome.

As for the identity crisis, when did you take on the role of his therapist? It is NOT your job to think that about him, and allowing yourself to walk that path is only going to lead to more walls between the two of you instead of finding common ground to work together.

Xoayn “He complains that he has to take the heavier side of the patient when he’s literally a dude and I’m a female. Obviously I’m not as strong as he is. He’s made me hurt my back multiple times.”

-Well, does he? Because your reply of “being a girl” sure makes it sound that way. He has every right to complain if he is continuously on the heavy end. Being a girl is NOT a valid excuse. You both took the job with certain lifting expectations, and as partners, you need to be able to do the heavy lifting as well. If you have been getting by using that excuse prior to him, then shame on you. You need to hit the gym or practice lifting techniques. You would not last long as my partner if you always had the expectation of me doing the heavy lifting.

How has he made YOUR back hurt? Maybe, YOU have made HIS back hurt…but he has not complained or expressed it.

Xoayn “He’s so impatient one time I was moving my car for him to park there and he backed up without me and crashed into another rig I had to help him squeeze out and cover both our asses.”

-I do not understand this part. Why did you need to move your car for him to park an ambulance? Did you park someone that you should NOT have? Otherwise, it is hard to imagine why your car is occupying the only spot the ambulance can park in.

As for backing an ambulance without you spotting, if you have a company policy of always needing a spotter, then he is in the wrong. I absolutely would NOT support a partner who chooses to violate policy and damages property. Because as soon as the damaged party complains, or as soon as a witness emerges, or as soon as he or you tell anyone…it is no longer a secret and you both will be fired. And rightfully so. And why would you cover for someone you dislike so much??

Xoayn “He’s rude af I’ll be talking to him and he’ll have his headphones in. He lll text his gf while driving and will literally put both our jobs on the line cuz he has to text his gf right that very moment. The camera has gone off multiple times saying distracted.”

-Maybe you talk too much? When I fly, when I play poker, when I sit anywhere in public, I often put in earbuds or headphones so no one will talk to me. I have no music or anything going, I just do not want to be bothered.

As for the texting, again this is where YOU need to be an adult. Address the behavior immediately, set the expectation, and explain the outcome. “X, please do NOT text while driving. I will drive if you need to be on the phone that much, but not the entire shift. Or, you can pull over and text. However, if you continue to text while driving me around, I will report you.”

Xoayn “I can’t stand him I can’t I miss my old partner. This guy is just ****ing dumb. I’m sure he can say the same about me but I dread going to work sometimes”

-Maybe THIS last statement of yours is the real crux of the problem. You had a good partner. One that did all the lifting, did not text, kept a slow pace same as you, and engaged in conversation. And then it ended. That will happen, again and again in every aspect of life. You sound quite young and inexperienced in general. You call him dumb and admit your own dumb-ness. Dreading going to work is a daily event for many people, suck it up. LIFE.
I can tell you’re annoying to work with just my this long *** paragraph. I’ve taken plenty of the heavy work but he is a “man” and he also wanted to work in this field. It’s really about the patient and not either one of us so I feel like ima hurt my back and drop a patient of course ima have the stronger individual take the heavy end. Common sense. I also work out so that has nothing to do with what’s going on here.

I’ve had plenty of jobs and have been an adult at a young age having to grow up fast due to the environment I live in. So anyways…

He’s paranoid because he made a comment about me wearing a sweater that wasn’t the company issued ones they gave us but he can sure text while driving with a patient in the back at that.

And there’s free parking in the back of the hospital we’re stationed at and half of the lot is the churchs parking lot. So if my car I parked in the ambulance spot is there and there’s no room for the ambulance I have to move my car. So don’t assume.

I don’t talk a lot. I make small talk to pass the time. He’s just rude and when it has nothing to do with him he won’t respond.

I can tell by this response you’re a pain to work with and so glad you ain’t my partner get over yourself.
 
OP
OP
xoayn

xoayn

Forum Probie
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Sure seems like now days people go out their way to find reasons to be offended so they can complain about it to anyone they can get to listen (without ever addressing the problems with the source of their outrage)
Lmao ok 👍🏼 I can still be annoyed and vent about it.
 
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