Hmmmmmm, where do I even begin with this one???
I am bored, so sit back and laugh and I will share as many as I can recall.
1. Early in my career, returning from water rescue training in the EMS Bronco which has a lift and a way too heavy winch mounted on a steel bumper up front so the weight distrubution is way off, I am also towing the rescue boat. I come around a blind corner known for kids playing close to the road, however this day a chicken and her babies ran out in front of me. My first reaction was to tap the break cause I did not yet register what was in front of me...once I realized it was chickens, I had already left off the break, however I sent myself in a sideways spin that I could not recover from. Luckily there was no oncoming traffic as I took up both lanes. I went off into a ditch, the Bronco went up on two wheels hit a tree and then came back down...the boat trailer broke off and rolled. Henceforth for quite a while I was know as Chicken Man and even recieved a rubber chicken award at the Xmas party.
2. I was responding up the bypass for an MVC and obviously traffic was backed up. I was making goor progress for a bit, then I came to a stop. I opted to hit the median not remembering it had rained earlier that day. Needless to say, I mad it about 50 feet before bogging it down to the bumper. Good Stuff! A dump truck pulled up behind me and pushed me out so I could continue to respond.
3. Ok disclaimer...this one was so long ago I can not remember if I put gas in a diesel or diesel in a gas ambulance, but either way everyone made fun of me for quite some time.My truck was the last of our gas units(yes, youngins, ambulances used to run on gas, much faster too)lol. Anyways, I had been in diesel for a few shifts then got switched back to gas. So I made a mistake at the pump..oops.
4. Split pants...need I say more?
Unforunately I have split quite a fe pair of pants in my day, all that damn proper lifting technique,etc.
Anyways, we were called for a lift assist. A 450lb woman had slid out of her chair and could not get up off the floor. So when we get there, I squat down in front of her and there is such a loud rip from crotch all the way to the belt loop. We did not finish the lift as I immediately retreated to a bathroom. Her family looked at me funny but no one said a word, very odd I thought. I get on the radio and call for the engine to go en route, I also asked them to contact me orivately before going en route. Well typical of this crew they just went en route. All I wanted was them to bring my pants out of the locker. So now since they are en route I have to call them on the radio and ask them to return to get my pants. My batallion chief was also listening and he keys up wanting to know whats going on with the engine and all the radio traffic, blah blah blah. Anyways, the engine crew finally brings me my pants, I change and come out of the room. At this point, the patient and her family start laughing, cause this whole time they thought I had farted and crapped myself since I retreated to the bathroom and didnt come out. We all had a good laugh on that one.
Ok thats enough for now...there are many more, but the moral of all this is remember to never take yourself too seriously in this business. Have fun and enjoy life, its the only way to guarentee you will survive past the 5-7 year burnout rate for EMS professionals.
