Subjects They Never Taught You In EMT-B School

mycrofft

mycrofft

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Tongues in cheeks, folks!:rofl:

1. "Boot Buying and Tying".

2. "EM-FU", the new martial art, involving boot knives, aluminum clipboards, "D" cylinders, fire extinguishers, and huge sidearms.

3. "Maps and Orientation (plus Garmin)".

4. "EMS Nutrition (or, how to make anything into a sandwich in nothing flat)".

5. "SLEEP DEPRIVATION 101 (or, how my circadian cycle, cycles)".

6. "How to Look Good in a Jumpsuit (before you lose those fifteen pounds)".

Others?
 
mycrofft said:

2. "EM-FU", the new martial art, involving boot knives, aluminum clipboards, "D" cylinders, fire extinguishers, and huge sidearms.
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You forgot the good ol' backboard sandwich :D



7. How to keep a straight face on ridiculous calls.
 
In addition to to sandwich is "what restaurants/fast-food places stay open 24 hours".
 
Which reminds me, in addition to #6, "How to get blood out of a white uniform shirt."
 
sirengirl said:
Which reminds me, in addition to #6, "How to get blood out of a white uniform shirt."
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Like ^.
How to keep your lunch in a broad range of odors.
Dispatcher bashing 103
Dialysis 206
 
firefite said:
In addition to to sandwich is "what restaurants/fast-food places stay open 24 hours".
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In addition to this, which restaurants will take your food, re-make/re-warm when you get a call in the middle of dinner.
 
Where the clean restrooms are

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How to TUBE patients.

Which hospitals give free food...
 
Sasha said:
Where the clean restrooms are

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You mean the bed pan in the back of the ambulance isn't for crew use?
 
101 Ways to tell a patient they do not need an ambulance without actually saying, "You do not need an ambulance."
 
"Advanced Vehicle Inspection/Change of Shift"
("All the important points, like wiper blades, oxygen level, leftovers crammed into the door pockets behind the maps, and leaving the battery switches on so the battery dies").
 
Epi-do said:
101 Ways to tell a patient they do not need an ambulance without actually saying, "You do not need an ambulance."
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LOL![GVIDEO][/GVIDEO]
This needs to spin off into its own thread
 
JPINFV said:
You mean the bed pan in the back of the ambulance isn't for crew use?
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Im sure you could use it, but i wouldnt want to put my naked butt near it, its probably crawling with mrsa, kpc, vre etc.

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nemedic said:
Hydrogen peroxide followed by a clorox wipe
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I got the peroxide but no wipes. Never heard that before. Mine ended up being a mix of peroxide, lemon dish soap, and windex.
 
sirengirl said:
I got the peroxide but no wipes. Never heard that before. Mine ended up being a mix of peroxide, lemon dish soap, and windex.
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Some hospitals here have clorox wipes. Amazing they get anything out.

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mycrofft said:
and leaving the battery switches on so the battery dies
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Crap, this is a Master's level course around here with the various combinations of what has to be left on and turned off to get the A/C to run off a shoreline and the battery to charge but NOT leave the lights, outlets ect on so the current draw exceeds the charger. It's different in seemingly every single truck, even sister trucks.
 
"Uniform Decon: Advanced Studies"

There will be practicums including the following: meconium, CSF, stool, urine, charcoal/mannitol, pizza sauce, brains, blood, vomitus, and tobacco residue.
 
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