Recovering alcoholic

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Copinghealthy

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Hey y'all! I am a recovering alcoholic and became a medic after finding sobriety. I have never abused drugs. I have 5 years clean from alcohol. I wanted to be a Paramedic to be of service to others and to have a more fulfilling career. I bartended prior to this career and bartended successfully in sobriety.

The question is, is it appropriate to disclose this to co-workers when the inevitable "after shift drinks" invite comes? I know there have been horrible news stories about narcotic abuse in our field. I don't want to be judged or assumptions to be made about me. Keep it simple and continue politely declining drinks or state my truth?

Thanks!
 
If you can go out with a group and enjoy yourself while they drink and you don't, I don't see why you'd have to explain that. I don't drink, but that doesn't stop me from getting together with friends or family. Nobody has asked me yet why I don't drink, and it hasn't occurred to me to be concerned about what they're thinking.
 
I don't drink, and I still enjoy going out with the team after shift, etc. Never made a big deal out of it, just mentioned that I don't drink. No one has yet said a negative word or pressured me in any way. Heck, a lot of the time I am the DD and no one has an issue with that!
 
How ironic... I'm drinking a beer while typing this. There's nothing wrong with going out with work buddies and not drinking alcohol. If they ask just say I don't drink. You don't necessarily need to disclose that you're a former alcoholic.
 
I think my main concern is that if I am honest with a few close co-workers, it will get to my bosses. I don't want my bosses to worry about having me on staff, managing narcotics. I don't want to get fired. But I want to be honest with my friends at work. Otherwise I guess they won't truly know me. I guess work and play is best kept separate?
 
Copinghealthy said:
I think my main concern is that if I am honest with a few close co-workers, it will get to my bosses. I don't want my bosses to worry about having me on staff, managing narcotics. I don't want to get fired. But I want to be honest with my friends at work. Otherwise I guess they won't truly know me. I guess work and play is best kept separate?
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Yes keep work and home separate. You go to work to make a living, look for friends outside of work.
 
Copinghealthy said:
Hey y'all! I am a recovering alcoholic and became a medic after finding sobriety. I have never abused drugs. I have 5 years clean from alcohol. I wanted to be a Paramedic to be of service to others and to have a more fulfilling career. I bartended prior to this career and bartended successfully in sobriety.
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Congratulations on 5 years of sobriety. That's quite an accomplishment and IIRC, you are approaching the time frame (8 years?) where statistically your chances of ever falling off the wagon start to drop.

Copinghealthy said:
I think my main concern is that if I am honest with a few close co-workers, it will get to my bosses. I don't want my bosses to worry about having me on staff, managing narcotics. I don't want to get fired. But I want to be honest with my friends at work. Otherwise I guess they won't truly know me. I guess work and play is best kept separate?
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I can see this potentially being a real challenge sometimes, because bars and alcohol are a big part of socializing in our society anyway, and probably even more so with EMS folks because it tends to be a younger crowd.

If you are already a medic, how have you managed so far? If whatever you have been doing has been working for you, just keep doing it. If it hasn't been working well for you, what specifically is the problem?

I think you can tell people enough to give them some explanation for why you don't drink, without giving too much personal history. When they ask why you never want to go to the bars or never have a drink, just say something like "I used to drink, but I ended up enjoying it too much and I've found that I'm much better off just avoiding it altogether" or something along those lines. Be casual about it, but firm if anyone tries to pressure you. Most people will get the hint. Alcohol problems aren't uncommon, everyone has known at least one person who has dealt with it.
 
Remi said:
Congratulations on 5 years of sobriety. That's quite an accomplishment and IIRC, you are approaching the time frame (8 years?) where statistically your chances of ever falling off the wagon start to drop.
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Ditto.

One of my partners has been sober for 3 years. He is now a good friend, and I can tell you it did not really change anything. Yes, I became more cognizant about inviting him to bars, and I usually redirected our group to middle of the road type places like Red Robin. Drinks could be had if people desired, but there was also food and pop and the environment didn't revolve around drinking. Management at my employer really doesn’t care about your past or current history as long as you didn’t show up to work drunk. Where I work I think that the supervisors would be supportive if they found out, and they wouldn’t discriminate.

Overall I’d say Don't sweat it too much. Everyone has their demons (especially in EMS). Please do not be afraid to reach out for help if you need it. EMS can be stressful, and the emotional toll can weigh heavily on providers after years of bad calls accumulate. There have been times I was tempted to use alcohol to distract myself - don't do it. Reach out for help from your EAP or CISM folks, or call Safe Call Now 206-459-3020.
 
Copinghealthy said:
I think my main concern is that if I am honest with a few close co-workers, it will get to my bosses. I don't want my bosses to worry about having me on staff, managing narcotics. I don't want to get fired. But I want to be honest with my friends at work. Otherwise I guess they won't truly know me. I guess work and play is best kept separate?
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Do you know how many functional alcoholics we have in this field? If they are still employed, then you have nothing to worry about. Your bosses will worry about you and narcotics the same, whether you are a friend of Bill or not (meaning, they will make sure you account for them all, just like they do for every other employee)

If you want to go out after work, do it. Nobody says you need to drink alcohol. If you say you don't drink alcohol, no one should try to get you drunk. I wouldn't tell them why you aren't drinking (unless you want to, your choice), because that's none of their business. But if they are your friends (and not just acquaintances), and you want to tell them, then do it.

BTW, 5 years sober is an awesome accomplishment, and nothing to hide.... now if you were currently on a 5 year bender, that would be something you don't want to get back to your bosses
 
Copinghealthy said:
I think my main concern is that if I am honest with a few close co-workers, it will get to my bosses. I don't want my bosses to worry about having me on staff, managing narcotics. I don't want to get fired. But I want to be honest with my friends at work. Otherwise I guess they won't truly know me. I guess work and play is best kept separate?
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There's a difference between being dishonest and not volunteering your life's story. Assuming bars in your area serve soft drinks, I'm not seeing a problem, unless you're concerned about triggering your addiction by socializing in a bar.
 
Thanks guys! I work hard to be accurate in my narcotics logs so I hope my bosses wouldn't care. I bartended sober and my bar bosses didn't care. They were actually happy because inventory was more accurate .

We in ems definitely all have our demons. Being in recovery though, I have a lot more resources than most when calls get hard, I have compassion fatigue, or I just plain old don't get along with a partner. I'm pretty lucky to have meetings, a sponsor, a sponsee and friends also in recovery who listen and have been through hard **** themselves. I appreciate all of you sharing with me.
 
Copinghealthy said:
I appreciate all of you sharing with me.
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We appreciate YOU sharing with us. Good luck. Offer to DD if you want to socialize and are comfortable in that position (sounds like you would if you've bartender since sobriety). I know some have said look for friends outside of work, but many of my closest friends are from work. You don't have to alienate yourself. If you're worried about it getting back to bosses, reconsider your trust in that person. Good luck and stay strong!


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Congrats on your sobriety.

As for "after shift drinks", I can say 100% I have NEVER gone out for drinks after an EMS shift, nor have I been asked. Majority of my EMS career was 24 hour shifts or very long 12-14 hour shifts. Last thing I wanted was to go sit in a bar...
 
I used to drink...a lot. When folks ask me out, I just tell them I don't drink anymore. Most mature adults understand this. Congrats on your sobriety. Stay strong, it's a lifelong process.
 
Copinghealthy said:
Hey y'all! I am a recovering alcoholic and became a medic after finding sobriety. I have never abused drugs. I have 5 years clean from alcohol. I wanted to be a Paramedic to be of service to others and to have a more fulfilling career. I bartended prior to this career and bartended successfully in sobriety.

The question is, is it appropriate to disclose this to co-workers when the inevitable "after shift drinks" invite comes? I know there have been horrible news stories about narcotic abuse in our field. I don't want to be judged or assumptions to be made about me. Keep it simple and continue politely declining drinks or state my truth?

Thanks!
Click to expand...
Copinghealthy said:
Hey y'all! I am a recovering alcoholic and became a medic after finding sobriety. I have never abused drugs. I have 5 years clean from alcohol. I wanted to be a Paramedic to be of service to others and to have a more fulfilling career. I bartended prior to this career and bartended successfully in sobriety.

The question is, is it appropriate to disclose this to co-workers when the inevitable "after shift drinks" invite comes? I know there have been horrible news stories about narcotic abuse in our field. I don't want to be judged or assumptions to be made about me. Keep it simple and continue politely declining drinks or state my truth?

Thanks!
Click to expand...
Can you please share how you managed to become EMT? I am a recovering alcoholic/addict as well, 4 years clean, 7 years w/o drugs. Not sure they'd accept me into a program.
 
Congrats on your sobriety! I'm not sure how you are doing it (on your own, 12 step program, etc.) Being someone in a situation somewhat akin to yours I will say that working in a bar and going there to socialize are two completely different things. I do know that there are people in the field who do not drink alcoholic beverages whether they are in recovery or simply tea totalers. These folks can make some decent friends and allies on the occasions in which you find yourself in a situation were alcohol is around (but you should know of them prior to needing them). For your own sake please keep in mind that the mind and addiction is "cunning, baffling, and powerful". Keep a list of sober friends handy and always have a way out. Good luck and always remember to stay true to yourself.
 
PAMOMTWINS said:
Can you please share how you managed to become EMT? I am a recovering alcoholic/addict as well, 4 years clean, 7 years w/o drugs. Not sure they'd accept me into a program.
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While both addictions are powerful, an alcohol addiction doesnt preclude you from holding a certification, as drug addiction does.

That's a long road ahead. I wish you luck.
 
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