What's Your Favorite EMS Story To Tell?

TornWingedAngel1

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I don't necessarily mean the coolest, or goriest or the one that taught you something (thought it may certainly have any or all of those attributes). I just mean your favorite story to tell to other people.
 
When my psych patient begged to have a baby with me so he could take her to McDonalds. And his ex wife dumped him and he JUST DONT WANT TO LIVE ANYMORE.... that entire transport was very entertaining.
 
The old man that was riding his bike with the neighborhood kids. They were riding their bikes over a ramp, so he decided he could do it too. Unfortunately, he was unable to land it like the kids, and fell, breaking his hip. He was joking all the way to the ER, saying that his wife would never let him live it down, and tell him that he needed to start acting his age. The nurses were calling him Evil Knevil when I was leaving the hospital.
 
I just tell everyone that I worked a shark attack.
 
"What happened?" (at a fender bender)
"Shark attack!"

"What happened?" (at a plane crash)
"Shark attack!"

"What happened?" (at a shark attack)
"Plane crash!"

:P :P :P
 
"What happened?" (at a fender bender)
"Shark attack!"

"What happened?" (at a plane crash)
"Shark attack!"

"What happened?" (at a shark attack)
"Plane crash!"

:P :P :P

That reminds me of the commercial... "Cigarette....cigarette....cigarette.... SHARK!!! SHARK!!!! SHARK!!!" bahahaha.
 
"What happened?" (at a plane crash)
"Shark attack!"

I've actually used that one.

My favorite story to tell is the one about delivering a baby on my birthday while smelling strongly of deer urine.
 
Broke a partner's arm by putting on the brakes as he was mooning the rig behind us with 2 gloves he blew up like balloons....oops. I put on the brakes right as he turned to sit. Launched him. Learned to look before braking with him in the back after that. Ya just never know <_<
 
Once upon a time...

..a brand new EMT came to his first company, knew everything they wanted him to do, had perfect handwriting, drove like a blend of Chuck Yeager and Vin Diesel, was always patient with the patients, never carried any visible EMT gear on his person, had good skin, good breath, and could lift twice his weight.
The first sleepover shift, his coworkers ductaped a garbage bag over his head and said it was SEDS (Sudden EMT Death Syndrome).
Sleep tight!
 
I have a couple winners;

1. The guy who tried to jump his BMX over a retaining wall after 12 beers and ended up on Facebook (supposedly we did as well as his mate was recording it while we were there .... still havent found it)

2. The guy who was in the local lockup (not super max) for something and did not want to go PT or whatever was planned in the morning so had his cellmate who was an ex pathology tech bleed him out so he would look sick. The tech used a razor blade from a pencil sharpner to make a small cut in one of the vessels in the groin and bled him into a bedpan, well, he bled out a bit too much!

3. Being corrected by a patient that the large bone in the top of the leg is the femur not the tibia; I jokingly offered him the stethoscope from around my neck, here, you better take this sort of thing. Was a good laugh

4. Something else I can't remember
 
When asked if anything ever made me sick I reply " Once I was 60 hours into a non stop 96 hour shift when as I bent over the bloody patient I suddenly felt the urge to puke when it dawned on me that I was still wearing the same underwear."
 
I don't like war stories as a rule. Mostly because they involve me frustratedly listening to some sessional instructor at uni talk about how he did this and that and it was this big..he swears. Also I don't have many of my own on account of being a student and all, but I do like to tell this one to anyone who will listen.

Got a job late in the day on placement. It had been a pretty big day, a young girl had suicided to start the day, followed by another arrest, a stabbing and an AMI. This job would mean that we would be significantly late getting home. The medics didn't utter a single foul word. 20 minute response time. Old woman, fallen over, not injured. No transport required, could have gone home then and there, especially given the day we'd had.

The medics took the time to sit down, make a cup of tea, and talk with the women to understand why she fell. It became apparent that she had tripped over the mat...so we moved it for her. She also had some oedematous legs that she had seen the doctor about, but that had been troubling her walking lately but could not get into see the doctor again for a long while. So the medic rings the doctor and gets the appointment moved up significantly, and writes a note explaining the situation. A council case worker then arrives and the medic explains the situation, and they agree that the woman needs a walker (walking frame). So they ring the relevant council body and organise for a walker to be delivered. We finish our cup of tea and leave a much happier old woman at home, well past the end of the shift.

I've been lucky enough to see all the flashy stuff in my short time on placements, but I think that this was the best piece of paramedic practice I've ever seen. I like to use it as an example of how I believe we can do more than just run people into the ED and of the kinds of paths that truly advocating for the patient can take.

Don't mean to get all serious, return to the hilarious stories :-)
 
When asked if anything ever made me sick I reply " Once I was 60 hours into a non stop 96 hour shift when as I bent over the bloody patient I suddenly felt the urge to puke when it dawned on me that I was still wearing the same underwear."

Okay...coulda gone forever and not known that ^. :)
 
Mine consists of a brunette and a.................

Oh wait, I can't tell that one here!
 
..a brand new EMT came to his first company, knew everything they wanted him to do, had perfect handwriting, drove like a blend of Chuck Yeager and Vin Diesel, was always patient with the patients, never carried any visible EMT gear on his person, had good skin, good breath, and could lift twice his weight.
The first sleepover shift, his coworkers ductaped a garbage bag over his head and said it was SEDS (Sudden EMT Death Syndrome).
Sleep tight!
The average human breathes 600-700 million times in their lifetime. Taping the plastic bag over your head must make you live forever!
 
Let's Finish Reaper's story...follow my lead; keep 'em short

Mine consists of a brunette and a.................

...Esophageal Obturator Airway. We were en route to...
 
Probably being passed by an ambulance that was on fire and started two wildfires.
 
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