Were you ever underestimated?

mycrofft

mycrofft

Still crazy but elsewhere
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Tell us your story!
(I think of this thanks to the current thread about prehospital morphine, and because, as I tell my wife, I usually make a very good second impression).
Please, "say on".
 
Everyday at least once. Im a new paramedic, Im female, Im physically little, and not ugly. I swear the next guy to tell me to let the men handle it is going to get my foot so far up their back end they will be sucking my toes. It usually takes me busting my rear a little harder than the guys but after a while they get that I am just as smart and can physically do most of the same things they do and they back off.
 
All the time. I'm a young, average-sized female, and my crazy work schedule means that I'm constantly winding up with new partners and crews.

It's really not a big deal. Most people back off after the first call or two. For the few that keep wanting to "instruct" me on everything, like the one other basic who keeps telling me what the OPQRST questions are for every time we're on a cardiac call (the order I ask them isn't the same order he learned, so he thinks I must not know anything), I just ignore them and keep going.
 
The physician at a smaller ER refused to believe that the patient being transported was in A-Flutter... Made a comment as to my obvious lack of experience reading ECG's, and that it must be A-Fib.

Well, his face turned a nice shade of red when we walked back in the room and looked at the 12-lead we had done. I even got an apology out of it, and used the chance to educate him about what paramedics know and can do.
 
Yup, more than once, and I'm sure it will happen again.

I've got 2 big strikes against me going into any call, I'm a smaller female, and I'm young. As people above have run into, I've been asked "oh are you sure you don't want me to lift that?" or " are you going to be ok by yourself, or do you want someone to ride in with you?".

At least with the first one, it's only insulting on a personal level. When I'm asked the second question it's insulting both personally and professionally because of the implication I can't take care of the patient myself.

I've also surprised the same supervisor 3-4 times. Hopefully he catches on soon, because it's almost getting insulting that he keeps underestimating me.
 
Take em out and get em drunk..

then talk sense into em.
Or whup em.
We had two ladies on my last service with that genetic deal (two X chromosomes) problem. One was gorgeous and meticulous, the other was pretty, her family was well-connected and extremely rich.
 
I would rather be underestimated and then spring it on em when I need to then to be overestimated and F*** up bigtime....

Lay low and carry ALL the sticks is my motto :P
 
This is a good spot to put in my two cents; and an apology to all the more petite ladies I have ever worked with.

I was raised to be a gentleman; thank you Mom and Dad: the problem is that it can bite you when you work in EMS.
I was always the one that tried to do the heavy lifting and carrying; not wanting to let my female partners do it. Even though they could do it; and I wasn't trying to be that way saying that they couldn't do it. Just ingrained in me.
When I was precepting a young lady who was 4'10" she had to actually yell at me and my partner (raised the same way) that day to let her lift the patients. she surprised us both, and did very well in all aspects of patient care.

So ladies; when you get someone that is acting like I did; don't try to take it as an insult, think of it as a compliment; that we are trying to treat you like a lady: then hit us with the O2 tank and go about doing your patient care.

Again I apologize to all the ladies that I worked with (all women in general) for treating you like a lady.
 
johnrsemt said:
This is a good spot to put in my two cents; and an apology to all the more petite ladies I have ever worked with.

I was raised to be a gentleman; thank you Mom and Dad: the problem is that it can bite you when you work in EMS.
I was always the one that tried to do the heavy lifting and carrying; not wanting to let my female partners do it. Even though they could do it; and I wasn't trying to be that way saying that they couldn't do it. Just ingrained in me.
When I was precepting a young lady who was 4'10" she had to actually yell at me and my partner (raised the same way) that day to let her lift the patients. she surprised us both, and did very well in all aspects of patient care.

So ladies; when you get someone that is acting like I did; don't try to take it as an insult, think of it as a compliment; that we are trying to treat you like a lady: then hit us with the O2 tank and go about doing your patient care.

Again I apologize to all the ladies that I worked with (all women in general) for treating you like a lady.
Click to expand...

Ditto here too!
 
Yes! I am also a female of average structure. Had a male partner who felt he needed to do all the lifting. Pulled him aside after a call one afternoon and told him I am also on this truck, we are partners, and that I had passed the same lift test he did.

And I agree with Kaisu! Gotta lay low!
 
johnrsemt said:
This is a good spot to put in my two cents; and an apology to all the more petite ladies I have ever worked with.

I was raised to be a gentleman; thank you Mom and Dad: the problem is that it can bite you when you work in EMS.
I was always the one that tried to do the heavy lifting and carrying; not wanting to let my female partners do it. Even though they could do it; and I wasn't trying to be that way saying that they couldn't do it. Just ingrained in me.
When I was precepting a young lady who was 4'10" she had to actually yell at me and my partner (raised the same way) that day to let her lift the patients. she surprised us both, and did very well in all aspects of patient care.

So ladies; when you get someone that is acting like I did; don't try to take it as an insult, think of it as a compliment; that we are trying to treat you like a lady: then hit us with the O2 tank and go about doing your patient care.

Again I apologize to all the ladies that I worked with (all women in general) for treating you like a lady.
Click to expand...

Hear Hear!!
 
johnrsemt said:
Again I apologize to all the ladies that I worked with (all women in general) for treating you like a lady.
Click to expand...

Here's the thing - for many of us, act like a lady was what we were told when we did something that someone didn't want us to - may laugh too loudly, or climb a tree, or want to play football, etc. etc.

The problem is how you define lady. If you use it to impose some sort of ideal of how you want a woman to be, then you can understand why it is resented by women who want to be who and what they are.

It's like me saying to a man "Gee - sorry for treating you like a good boy."

If you mean treating another human being with respect, professionalism and courtesy, then I don't have a problem with it.
 
I do understand that for many men they were raised being told that it was polite to offer assistance, and I'm going to amend my statement about being offended.

When someone offers to carry something like the monitor, or the med box, I see that as a polite gesture. When it comes to lifting patients and other "big" stuff it comes off less as being polite and more as questioning if I am strong enough to handle it.

This may sound bizarre, but I don't like being treated like a lady at work. I would rather be treated the same as everyone else. It makes me feel really awkward when I'm the only one not carrying anything, or am always first through the door because it's being held open for me. Often I'm the only female on scene out of 6 to 10 EMS people and it seems strange to be treated differently, even if it is only out of politeness.
 
To be honest, I'm not bothered if men offer to carry things. I only get offended if they actually try grabbing it from me or telling me I should give it to them. I'm only really offended if they comment on my size, gender, or age while doing so.

It's kinda annoying to always look a lot weaker than I really am, but hey, that's life. Might take a bit longer to earn respect, but I always earn it eventually.
 
Medic744 said:
Everyday at least once. Im a new paramedic, Im female, Im physically little, and not ugly. I swear the next guy to tell me to let the men handle it is going to get my foot so far up their back end they will be sucking my toes. It usually takes me busting my rear a little harder than the guys but after a while they get that I am just as smart and can physically do most of the same things they do and they back off.
Click to expand...

whoa! Calm down there little lady. I like toe sucking of "not ugly women".:excl::excl::excl:
 
johnrsemt said:
So ladies; when you get someone that is acting like I did; don't try to take it as an insult, think of it as a compliment; that we are trying to treat you like a lady: then hit us with the O2 tank and go about doing your patient care.

Again I apologize to all the ladies that I worked with (all women in general) for treating you like a lady.
Click to expand...

It's not a compliment to treat a coworker as a fragile alien creature because they're female. It's not professional to be sexist towards coworkers, even if it is benevolent sexism.
 
Where I volunteer, the cops are awesome and always want to do the lifting for the female crewmembers. As we have a number of girls that are quite small (but very skilled nonetheless), their help is invaluable on scene.

However, there are times that the patient isn't all that heavy or it's a simple lift and I would just want to do it myself. A couple weeks ago, we had a decent weight man, maybe around 250lbs that the officer was having a hard time getting him into the truck with the stretcher. How so, I still haven't the foggiest. I had orginally been aside getting more information on the incident with another officer when I just went over, using the lovely skills from being a transport schlup, and he was in 1, 2, 3.

Needless to say, the officers began cracking jokes about not wanting to mess with me.
 
johnrsemt said:
This is a good spot to put in my two cents; and an apology to all the more petite ladies I have ever worked with.

I was raised to be a gentleman; thank you Mom and Dad: the problem is that it can bite you when you work in EMS.
I was always the one that tried to do the heavy lifting and carrying; not wanting to let my female partners do it. Even though they could do it; and I wasn't trying to be that way saying that they couldn't do it. Just ingrained in me.
When I was precepting a young lady who was 4'10" she had to actually yell at me and my partner (raised the same way) that day to let her lift the patients. she surprised us both, and did very well in all aspects of patient care.

So ladies; when you get someone that is acting like I did; don't try to take it as an insult, think of it as a compliment; that we are trying to treat you like a lady: then hit us with the O2 tank and go about doing your patient care.

Again I apologize to all the ladies that I worked with (all women in general) for treating you like a lady.
Click to expand...

I have to agree with this. When those of us that were raised like this offer to lift or whatever else is needed we do so out of years of hearing that we should. Not out of a lack of respect. We also have a fear of what happened to me a few days ago. I was out with atwo female medic crew on scene. As we started into the ambulance with the two females loading the patient and me carrying the jump-bag my mom drove by and saw what was happening. Later that day I got a "talking to". I must ask, have you ever seen an irate 5' 6" 100 pound southern mom having a heartto heart with her 6'8" 275 pound son? It aint pretty.
 
mycrofft said:
Tell us your story!
(I think of this thanks to the current thread about prehospital morphine, and because, as I tell my wife, I usually make a very good second impression).
Please, "say on".
Click to expand...

Frequently. Very poor eyesight, 4 speech impediments, and a college dropout. And I'm not finished adding even more credentials behind my name.

The biggest incidence of being underestimated was after the crash. There were very few people who believed I'd recover and come back flying. I did.

I'm living proof that "it ain't the dawg in the fight. It's the fight in the dawg".
 
I'm living proof that "it ain't the dawg in the fight. It's the fight in the dawg".
Click to expand...
Amen Mike. I used you as an example when one of my friends survived a military helicopter crash with severe injuries and was depressed over his chances at recovering.
 
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