Tiger and Santa

46Young

Level 25 EMS Wizard
3,063
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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus?

Santa stopped at three "ho's". :lol:
 

RyanMidd

Forum Lieutenant
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What's the difference between Santa and rock climbers?

Nothing; they both have beards, wear the same clothes every day, and work one day a year.
 

atropine

Forum Captain
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WoW, the first post was cool, the second one sucked:p
 

bunkie

Forum Asst. Chief
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:lol: Did anyone see the SNL interview with one of his "mistresses"? It was pretty funny.
 

SanDiegoEmt7

Forum Captain
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Did you hear that Phil Mickelson called Elin Nordegren? He asked her for some tips on beating Tiger.



The police asked Tiger's wife how many times she hit him. "I can't remember," Elin said, "just put me down for a 5."




Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole-in-one.
 

WarDance

Forum Lieutenant
190
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The other day at the end of school day Little Johnny's teacher said, "today we're going to play a game and when you get a question right you can go home. I will say a quote and you tell me who said it."

First she said "Four score and seven years ago..." The girl sitting next to him raised her hand first and said, "Abe Lincoln!" She got her things and left.

Next was, "One small step for man; one giant leap for mankind." Another girl raised her hand just before Johnny and said, "Neil Armstrong." She also got to leave.

Tired of being at school Johnny suddenly blurts out, "I wish these b****** would shut up!"

Caught off gaurd the teacher said, "who said that?!?!"

Johnny replies, "Tiger Woods." He got his things and left.
 

Rob123

Forum Crew Member
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Just because you’re the world’s no. 1 golfer, it doesn’t mean you can’t be beaten by your wife.
 

tactics

Forum Probie
16
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I thought it was a great joke, but I come from a rope rescue/SAR background.
 

AKidd

Forum Crew Member
37
0
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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus?

Santa stopped at three "ho's". :lol:

I must share the first time I heard this joke - my daughter had just been admitted to the hospital (Christmas Eve) and we were heading back from X-ray. Up ahead of us, there was a porter pushing an (occupied) morgue cart. He stops dead in the hallway (no pun intended) and while blocking the the hallway with his corpse cohort, takes the time to tell some of his coworkers a few jokes before carrying on.

While the joke was mildly funny, I just had to shake my head at his timing - blocking the hallway while there is a team of folks heading your way with another patient in a more lively state was likely not the best decision he made that day - he got a strip torn off him, and when the RT escorting us was done, I think he was ready to climb into his own cart. OOPS.
 
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