medic417
The Truth Provider
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the 100% directionless thread
- Thread starter KEVD18
- Start date
lightsandsirens5
Forum Deputy Chief
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Darn! This thing is loosing steam.
118 left.......
118 left.......
Sasha
Forum Chief
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What is, 3 MVCs, one seizure patient, one dyspnea patient, and a girl scout selling cookies?
The makings for a very awesome clinical!
The makings for a very awesome clinical!
was the girl scout one of those patients? Now that would be true dedication to the scouts.
Hmm well worst week ever. Had biology exam earlier today, and tomorrow chemistry exam. Normally these exams have a class average of a 60%. So it is like the hardest exam ever, for every exam.
Then so tomorrow i have the exam and 2 hours of other classes, a 2 hour break and then go on a standby for 12 hours 6pm to 6 am...no sleeping, because no truck.
Sasha
Forum Chief
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Can't sleep, I'll start fighting.... I'd rather do that at home, when there's no one to laugh at me.
Sasha
Forum Chief
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Bahaha. Not a sound sleeper?
I have a big, ooey gooey, yummy cheeseburger. All is right with the world!
medic417
The Truth Provider
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Sasha
Forum Chief
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That will clog an artery or two. Enjoy.h34r:
I know! Don't worry, I have my emergency angioplasty kit in my car ^_^
medic417
The Truth Provider
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Sasha
Forum Chief
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But I've had three hours of training on heart caths! I'm an expert! I have a cath lab in my bathroom!
fma08
Forum Asst. Chief
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Sasha
Forum Chief
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Thank you for supporting your local ems. The help is greatly appreciated by all.
When I call for chest pain, I'm gonna make the EMS crew carry me down three flights of stairs, then go back up for my house coat, and then walk from the stretcher to the bed at the hospital >:]
Meursault
Organic Mechanic
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mmm... Samoas. Might have to throw some insulin in the trunk with my emergency angio kit.
fma08
Forum Asst. Chief
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Please tell me you won't stoop to that level... <_<
lightsandsirens5
Forum Deputy Chief
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Sasha
Forum Chief
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I'm going to go hunt down another girl scout. And get lunch.
Thin mint ice cream sandwhiches and chinese food.... Ohh the chest pain we will have!
Thin mint ice cream sandwhiches and chinese food.... Ohh the chest pain we will have!
lightsandsirens5
Forum Deputy Chief
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Sounds like our Ambulance coodinator! (not really!):
The Ringmaster
OK, ladies and gentlemen, lets get down to this critique.
I've looked at the reports, Seems we've had a busy week!
Now, right away I'd like to say some words about supplies.
Our inventory's pretty decent, and I realize
Sometimes you need an item for use in your own pack,
But whoever took the defibrillator had better put it back!
Now while I'm on equipment, and I've mentioned it before,
Before you leave the bay make sure your rig will clear the door.
As you know, we've ordered a new cot for unit 6,
'Cause once those things have been run over, they're impossible to fix!
Sometimes I feel like the ringmaster in the circus.
Sometimes I feel like I'm the keeper in the zoo.
If things don't change, I'll go insane before the year is through.
I wish that I could trade in this entire crew!
Now, the Mayor has cut our budget, and though revenge is on our minds,
Last week at his party you stepped too far out of line.
I guarantee that someone here will surely get the sack
If I find out which one of you spiked the punch with ipecac!
And, it seems we're getting sued again, I'm sorry to report,
But if you wouldn't stop while on a run you could keep us out of court!
It's nice to hear that you asked the patient if he liked his coffee black,
But no more stopping at the Donut Store with someone dying in the back!
My doctor tells me that I can't take this much longer.
He says my heart just cannot take the strain.
If I could, I know that I should get out just the same,
'Cause if my heart holds out, I'm sure to go insane!
A note here for the gentlemen: You gotta think before you act.
Some patients are quite sensitive, so try to use some tact.
When a woman asks you why a chest survey is being done,
Tell her that "It's necessary," and NOT "Because it's fun!"
Last of all, our protocols leave no room for debate:
The patient must be fully unconscious BEFORE you intubate!
OK, I hope you got that down. I hope enough's been said.
And, I hope I never hear of these things happening again!
I must relax, 'cause I can't let this job get to me
A first attack I believe I could survive,
The ER's good, the doctors there could treat and stabilize,
but I can't trust this crew to get me there alive!
Sometimes I feel like the ringmaster in the circus.
Sometimes I feel like I'm the keeper in the zoo.
If things don't change, I'll go insane before the year is through.
I wish that I could trade in this entire crew!
The Ringmaster
OK, ladies and gentlemen, lets get down to this critique.
I've looked at the reports, Seems we've had a busy week!
Now, right away I'd like to say some words about supplies.
Our inventory's pretty decent, and I realize
Sometimes you need an item for use in your own pack,
But whoever took the defibrillator had better put it back!
Now while I'm on equipment, and I've mentioned it before,
Before you leave the bay make sure your rig will clear the door.
As you know, we've ordered a new cot for unit 6,
'Cause once those things have been run over, they're impossible to fix!
Sometimes I feel like the ringmaster in the circus.
Sometimes I feel like I'm the keeper in the zoo.
If things don't change, I'll go insane before the year is through.
I wish that I could trade in this entire crew!
Now, the Mayor has cut our budget, and though revenge is on our minds,
Last week at his party you stepped too far out of line.
I guarantee that someone here will surely get the sack
If I find out which one of you spiked the punch with ipecac!
And, it seems we're getting sued again, I'm sorry to report,
But if you wouldn't stop while on a run you could keep us out of court!
It's nice to hear that you asked the patient if he liked his coffee black,
But no more stopping at the Donut Store with someone dying in the back!
My doctor tells me that I can't take this much longer.
He says my heart just cannot take the strain.
If I could, I know that I should get out just the same,
'Cause if my heart holds out, I'm sure to go insane!
A note here for the gentlemen: You gotta think before you act.
Some patients are quite sensitive, so try to use some tact.
When a woman asks you why a chest survey is being done,
Tell her that "It's necessary," and NOT "Because it's fun!"
Last of all, our protocols leave no room for debate:
The patient must be fully unconscious BEFORE you intubate!
OK, I hope you got that down. I hope enough's been said.
And, I hope I never hear of these things happening again!
I must relax, 'cause I can't let this job get to me
A first attack I believe I could survive,
The ER's good, the doctors there could treat and stabilize,
but I can't trust this crew to get me there alive!
Sometimes I feel like the ringmaster in the circus.
Sometimes I feel like I'm the keeper in the zoo.
If things don't change, I'll go insane before the year is through.
I wish that I could trade in this entire crew!