RocketMedic
Californian, Lost in Texas
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Yeah, that's an issue, but in a vacuum (aside from toxic leadership) growing as a provider should be motivation enough.
Is it?
You said it yourself. You went all badass-hooah, but in your current personal work life, what has that accomplishment gotten you in comparison to a generic bog-standard provider who simply practices passable Comfortable Medicine?
Learning and overcoming real challenges is great....for people like you and I. Most people aren't like that.