Newb here...let me preface this post with a little hx about my ems career so far. I don't have an epic story/reason why I got into ems, i was just at a point in my life with no direction and kind of fell into it. I got my basic back in 2014 and went straight into a 2 yr paramedic program(graduated 12/2016). Zero to hero, no basic work experience. Which is ok...but, I definitely should've worked as a basic for a bit. Why? Because I would've figured out a hell of a lot sooner that this line of work is not for me. Right about 80% thru the medic program, I started losing interest and wanted to quit. A mentor convinced me otherwise but I already had a seed of doubt about the profession in the back of my head. Btw, did I mention that I absolutely hated the clinicals on the truck and didn't do as well as I should've? How I passed?...I have no idea. I had the concepts down, just applying them in real life was definitely hard for me. Still is. Let's fast forward a bit...I've been working with a private ems company for the last 8 months. Mostly transfers but I do get the occasional 911. I can't even begin to describe the amount of anxiety and fear that encompasses me when I'm on a 911 as the lead medic. So far I haven't royally ****ed up. That's good, right? I know everyone says it's normal and it takes a few yrs to get "comfortable" but I truly, madly, deeply(lol) feel like I will never get over this.
Now that I'm out in the field, I'm realizing that I don't wanna be married to the game just to live comfortably financially. I'm at a point in my life where I want to start having kids(I'm 26). I don't want to miss important events, birthdays, holidays, etc, etc...most of all, I don't want the responsibility/liability of someone's life in my hands. That's too much pressure for me. When i first started this journey, i was definitely the adrenaline junkie and excited about the career choice. Now, not so much. I'll take a toe pain any day over an MI/Stoke. My question is, should I get out quickly or give it some more time? I think i already know the answer to my own question. I'm just glad I can vent. It's been long overdue.
Now that I'm out in the field, I'm realizing that I don't wanna be married to the game just to live comfortably financially. I'm at a point in my life where I want to start having kids(I'm 26). I don't want to miss important events, birthdays, holidays, etc, etc...most of all, I don't want the responsibility/liability of someone's life in my hands. That's too much pressure for me. When i first started this journey, i was definitely the adrenaline junkie and excited about the career choice. Now, not so much. I'll take a toe pain any day over an MI/Stoke. My question is, should I get out quickly or give it some more time? I think i already know the answer to my own question. I'm just glad I can vent. It's been long overdue.