Work "spouse"

Good idea to partake in?

  • Yes

    Votes: 1 6.7%

  • No

    Votes: 14 93.3%
  • Total voters
    15
D

dcribb3207

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I have a friend who has become my " work wife". It started with my cooking getting me the " trophy husband" title and went from there. It has seamed to help with the downs of work because she makes me laugh, makes me look forward to coming into work, even gives me someone to talk about stuff like work drama or bad/bs calls and actually understands unlike my non-ems friends.

I had only heard of it once before my " marriage". Is it very common? And what are other people's thoughts on the benefits?
 
NysEms2117

NysEms2117

ex-Parole officer/EMT
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i take it your legally married to somebody else? My fiance does not care about girls that I am friends with at work. But it is just friends, no silly names, she calls me andrew i call her "name here". I always place my fiance first, if it means taking off work or w/e it entails. I have made that point very very clear to her (my legal fiance), which is why I think i get some lee-way. I'd try and back out of the whole nickname thing, and have her call you "your name here". Most of the time i'd imagine the "work husband/wife" ends up being a homewrecker? but i have no clue, nor do i want too, because i'd never do that personally.
 
Q

Qulevrius

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dcribb3207 said:
I have a friend who has become my " work wife". It started with my cooking getting me the " trophy husband" title and went from there. It has seamed to help with the downs of work because she makes me laugh, makes me look forward to coming into work, even gives me someone to talk about stuff like work drama or bad/bs calls and actually understands unlike my non-ems friends.

I had only heard of it once before my " marriage". Is it very common? And what are other people's thoughts on the benefits?
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If you're unhappy with your real relationship (in case you have any) and have to resort to being closer with a coworker, then you have a problem. If you are not in a relationship and are close with your coworker, yet resort to playing house with her, then you have a problem. I don't know what needs to be done in order to make people realize that any kind of fraternizing with coworkers of an opposite sex, is just a bad idea through and through. It not only contributes to the everpresent drama, but also is distracting and affects quality of care. Personal **** just does not belong at a work place, period.

And the mere fact that you have to ask about it people in a professional community and putting up a poll (???), makes all this even worse.
 
VentMonkey

VentMonkey

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Qulevrius said:
Personal **** just does not belong at a work place, period.
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Yes, and um...
NysEms2117 said:
I always place my wife first.
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...abso-friggin'-lutely (how's my New Yawk-ese, NYS?)
dcribb3207 said:
Is it very common? And what are other people's thoughts on the benefits?
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Fraternizing is common in any/ all work places. It doesn't make it right, especially if you're in a committed relationship.

Define "benefits":confused:. If by benefits you mean disrespecting the sanctity of your marriage (if you're in fact married, or even if your partner is).

Two words here, op: tread lightly. Is it a common term in this job? Yes. Do people have platonic friendships with co-workers that yield such "pet names"? Yeah, I'm sure they do.

I guess it depends on the kind of relationship you have at home and work. Nonetheless it's silly and doesn't really matter. Go to work, work, clock out, go home, kiss the loved one and let them know who's their true "spouse"...rinse, repeat. This is a silly thing to make a thread about.
 
NysEms2117

NysEms2117

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@VentMonkey tolerable at best ;)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
VentMonkey

VentMonkey

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NysEms2117 said:
@VentMonkey tolerable at best ;)
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IMG_0149.GIF
 
EpiEMS

EpiEMS

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dcribb3207 said:
I have a friend who has become my " work wife".
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This is a (potentially) dangerous idea, in my mind. That being said, if this is a term of endearment, I don't see a problem (except that an overzealous HR department could tell you to cool it on the terminology).
 
Summit

Summit

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The colloquial term "work spouse" can just refer to a close collegial relationship... or something more.

So make sure you stay outside of the blurry area surrounding the line delineating a close collegial relationship and something more.

If you get in the blurry zone, it is too easy to slowly work your way across the line without seeing it until it's too late.
 
Kevinf

Kevinf

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Good lord people. A "work wife / work hubby" is a fairly common term, and not exactly unusual. It's just someone you are naturally comfortable around and they feel the same way about you, i.e. a two-way trust. Usually defined as the intimacy of a marriage without the sex. If you've got a real significant other, it's probably a good idea to make sure they're aware of your quasi-relationship with this person. It shouldn't be an issue with them if you've got a stable and healthy home relationship. If you're single, it not really a problem at all and it might turn into a real marriage if things are right. Just don't fool around on the job.

Lighten up a bit fellas.
 
NysEms2117

NysEms2117

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Kevinf said:
Good lord people. A "work wife / work hubby" is a fairly common term, and not exactly unusual. It's just someone you are naturally comfortable around and they feel the same way about you, i.e. a two-way trust. Usually defined as the intimacy of a marriage without the sex. If you've got a real significant other, it's probably a good idea to make sure they're aware of your quasi-relationship with this person. It shouldn't be an issue with them if you've got a stable and healthy home relationship. If you're single, it not really a problem at all and it might turn into a real marriage if things are right. Just don't fool around on the job.

Lighten up a bit fellas.
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I disagree I've never seen it in le, or ems. What if some rig gets into an accident and your "work hubby" or whatever you call it is out, now your going to be freaking out. I understand a certain level of they are my co-workers, and I'm concerned, but I think any reasonable person can see what I'm getting at. Not to mention the toll it could take on a family(if you have one), or a significant other( that's the PC term I think) at home. I don't see any good from it. If you need to talk to somebody your company should have some association with a psych person, especially if it's due to work.
 
VentMonkey

VentMonkey

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@NysEms2117 it's a common term thrown about. Maybe not in your region, but a common term. With that, @Kevinf what say you regarding the phenomenally high divorce rates seen with public service jobs up to and including EMS?

How does this help foster a "healthy" relationship? I am merely sparking dialogue and not forming an attack. I think healthy relationships are subjective, and seeing how not one person has been in favor of the ops poll question I hardly doubt it's worth the trouble.

My last partner was a gal, and she's still a pretty good friend of the family, and one of the better partners I've had. I get it's just words to some, but not to everyone.

While my wife may laugh at the term, I can't help but wonder with divorce rates being what they are and marriages being "stints" this sort of reflects these abysmal statistics.
 
Kevinf

Kevinf

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I don't know what the divorce rate of EMS is, though my understanding is that divorces and not getting married at all are at record highs all around. My personal opinion is that divorces in EMS are more likely to arise due to "not being there" and financial problems rather than from liking someone at work. I've had a "work wife" at every job I've been at, 5 "wives" I count in total and it's always been a positive experience. Cue the "anecdotes aren't data. For what it's worth, I'm single so impairing a home relationship isn't an issue.
 
NysEms2117

NysEms2117

ex-Parole officer/EMT
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NysEms2117

NysEms2117

ex-Parole officer/EMT
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Kevinf said:
I don't know what the divorce rate of EMS is, though my understanding is that divorces and not getting married at all are at record highs all around. My personal opinion is that divorces in EMS are more likely to arise due to "not being there" and financial problems rather than from liking someone at work. I've had a "work wife" at every job I've been at, 5 "wives" I count in total and it's always been a positive experience. Cue the "anecdotes aren't data. For what it's worth, I'm single so impairing a home relationship isn't an issue.
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Is there a such thing as a work place pimp? you west coast folks(vent) doing your fancy mumbo jumbo, personally i can see it as a direct cause of divorce. agree with remi 100%
 
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