Touchy question re: crass jokes

[Aidey]

See that right there I feel is offensive and degrading toward women, but I'd never insist someone put aside their religious beliefs, again as long as it isn't directed at me. Asking me flat out to have sex with you in the on call room...again...crossing my personal boundaries even if it was in jest. And because it was said when we were alone, I tend to avoid being alone with said individual. I figure if the jokes are public then everyone hears and I can normally turn it around into something not as personal. I'm pretty quick with my wit normally. Like I said it takes a lot to get me to say "whoah" but I guess I've gotten there.

He balances it pretty well, and manages to work with people without issue for the most part. It was more of an example of how extreme things could get if everyone behaved according to the most conservative person there, and why it is a matter of balance.

Asking you to have sex is (to me) one of those above an beyond comments that needs to be addressed ASAP. Not only because it is incredibly inappropriate, but also because if you don't address it, it could come back to hurt you if someone else complains. You could be seen as a participant instead of the victim.

Also, if the guy is saying things like that to you, there is a decent chance he is saying it to other women and he needs to have some remedial training in how to not act like a jack ***.

 

[Aidey]

ER staff are pretty bad, but hands down cops are worse. Holy crap....

Also, I do get what you are saying about the difference between something said in public and something said in private. I've participated in conversations that would have had a very different vibe had one individual been talking at me*.


*At me vs with me. If that makes sense.

 

[ShannahQuilts]

Thus far I've just been avoiding being alone with the individuals as much as possible. ... I guess I wanted the input of others to guage if I was handeling things o.k. without doing the whole run to management thing.

No, you're not, because you're not doing the whole run to management thing. This sort of situation is what managers are supposed to handle. When you are at the point of being afraid to be alone with a coworker, who you are supposed to be able to trust, you need to speak to your supervisor/manager.

If you haven't already read "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin de Becker, please do so. Most libraries have a copy available.

 

[medic417]

I just walk off. People have figured out I like to laugh and joke but that I don't care for vulgar jokes. They also know that there is no place for physical play. If where I can not walk off I just tell them to drop it. Of course I'm old and well liked so no one has problem with me saying that.

Now if in public I tell people immediately to knock it off. If they start up again or refuse to knock it off I pursue disciplinary action. One thing to joke and blow off steam at the station but in public you better act professional even if you are not one.