To the first and original question:
If you're looking to make 50k+, EMS is not for you. You also will never be able to make a career out of being an EMT-B. You have to juggle shifts, will never be guaranteed an actual steady shift (I got lucky), and you will never have a social life or family life. You have to upgrade, and probably quite soon after you get your certification, if you want to eat and sleep. However, for a person that is new to EMS and seems to have a few misnomers about it, EMT-B is the place to start. I'd hate to see you throw yourself into a paramedic program head first, especially if you hated 4-year.
Can I ask a question? As a fellow 4-year to another, why do you hate it? Like others said, everyone goes to college expecting to have the time of their lives. I went there expecting nothing, and got nothing. The classes were so easy my first year I felt stupid for taking them so after my first week I enrolled in the EMT class the local CC was offering. I cross-registered between the two colleges and attended both. I trudged through my week at SUNY New Paltz only to look foward to Saturdays when I would go to EMT class. By that time I had already been a firefighter for 3 years, so I already knew what I was getting into. Honestly, don't quit college and just focus on EMS, you have to have something else. The reason why I hated my college so much is because I'm a country girl thrown into a town full of hippies and spoiled brats all-too-willing to spend their parents money. If you maybe examine the reason you hate your college so much, maybe you can look past it and fit in the EMS class somewhere inbetween.
Second question:
Why is the ratio of male to female important? When I first started out here in my Fire co. there was only one other female. But as long as you're willing to show that you'll work as hard as they will, they'll get over it for the most part. I've had my fair share of problems, but I don't do it to please them. If I did it for my co-workers or anything else then I wouldn't be a volunteer. In the EMS world, the women outnumber the men here. They actually prefer to hire women here because we get a lot of calls with little kids with broken everything coming off of the ski slope and the women tend to have a better manner with them.
You're more likely to make more money in a busy Fire co. than in EMS. No matter what you are, EMT-B or Paramedic, the Firefighter will always make more starting out. I'd recommend going to a local station and hanging out, chatting with the guys and asking some questions. Ask the Chief or ***'t Chief or Captain, depending on the department head, if you went through the course, would they hire you, why and why not. Don't just dive in, you'll be in for a world of hurt. Go do some research, hang out with some departments, ask them about their family life (VERY IMPORTANT AND OFTEN OVERLOOKED BY NEWBIES JUST LOOKING TO SAVE A FEW LIVES). While its true in every job, in EMS and the Fire world its much more pronounced, the better you do at work, the more your outside life suffers. Your sig. other often doesn't understand why you're hurt, or willing to hurt yourself, for others. They start thinking that they don't matter as much to you as your job does and yadda yadda yadda. So be sure you're willing to accept certain sacrifices.
As for paramedics with fire training? Very few in my area. Its all going to depend on area. Like it was said before, most stations prefer their medics to be just medics because they want to keep them. The firefighters will take care of their own, as soon as they get them out of the building they'll drop them on you and then you can do your job.