Online gaming addictions anybody? WoW

emtkelley

emtkelley

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My husband is addicted to World of Warcraft and it is breaking my heart. He no longer has any time for me, our dog, or for life in general. It is like a drug to him and believe me, I know what it is like to live with someone with an addiction.

From the minute he gets home til the wee hours of the morning he is gaming. Many times I have found him asleep at the computer from pure exhaustion. I have been tempted to delete his character (if I could figure out how) or to totally uninstall the game but I know he would be furious with this and it wouldn't fix the problem anyway.

Does anyone ave any experience with this personally and how have you dealt with it? He hasn't even applied yet for his FAFSA because he has been too busy gaming. I am afraid he will get himself into the same bind he got himself into last year that I had to jump through hoops and clear up for him because he just put it off (this was prior to the gaming thing).

I would be interested in hearing from folks who's life has been impacted by online gaming and maybe getting some support as I begin to make some decisions about what I am going to do about this situation.
 
I'm not a gamer, but I've read that WoW is the biggest thing going right now, so I'm certain you're not alone. I'm guessing that he is aware of your feelings, but maybe you need to reiterate them. I wish you the best of luck, dear...
 
I have tried to speak with him several times about this and he looks at me like I have three heads.

I have been looking under WoW addictions today and there is some very interesting and sad things I have come to find out. So much time people have lost due to online gaming. One guy missed his mother's funeral because he was hot and heavy into a game.

I guess I am happy we don't have children together. I would hate for them to suffer because of this.
 
Is he working? Does he do anything besides gaming? If the gaming is preventing him from during seemingly normal tasks, and is interfering with his life, then something needs to be done. He's going to need to set limits and stick to them. Obviously this is easier said then done.

Do you have insurance? Can you or he go to a therapist?

I'd hate to suggest an online website for an online addiction, but you may find some support in:

http://www.wowdetox.com/
http://www.olganonboard.org/

Good luck!
 
I have and used to play WoW. After a while I just got sick of it. Totally bored. I deleted it and didn't use it for 4 months. I am thnking of reinstalling it, but to tell the truth after playing it for a year I got soooo bored that I had no interested in it. Maybe the same will happen with him.

Certainly, speak to a professional. Gaming addiction usually means something else, much deeper, is going on.
 
I will say he does go to work. I know many people who have given everything up for these games. I am fortunate that it hasn't gotton that far.

We talked last night and I told him again how much this whole situation is hurting me. How perfect strangers get to spend more time with him than I do and how I was envious of those people. I asked him to limit his time he spends gaming and if he can't limit it, then we will have to revisit the issue and make some other decisions. To further set some guidelines, I explained that if he would help me around the house and spend some time with me, I might be more inclined to keep off his back about the gaming bt there has got to be a balance.

Thanks for the websites, Matt. I had already checked out the detox one and am in the process of looking at the 12 step one. I know of a fe wives I would like to share those with as well. Thanks to all who have offered help and encouragement.
 
I played WoW for about 2 years and acted much like your husband does. I was definitely addicted. I did go to work, but that was it. My wife and kids knew me only as someone sitting in the other room. I got angry when they wanted me to do other things, and I focused nearly all my time on that game. I used it as an escape from responsibility and stress. I hated my job at the time and felt unsuccessful. I was afraid of failure, so I went for the easy "win". WoW gives you lots of opportunities to be "successful", by doing quests and getting lots of good equipment and such, plus you do really feel part of a big community. It is designed to never end, to never make you feel as if you have done it all, so you constantly find new things to do. My wife complained the same way you are. Sometimes she yelled, threatening to delete my character, sometimes she stated plainly that she felt abandoned. My oldest daughter started sitting with me and drawing pictures of my character, for it was the only way to be with me. I realized, with much shame, that they desperately wanted me to spend time with them. This pressure, coupled with the realization that all my WoW "success" was meaningless, helped me delete the game from my life. I owned up to hiding from life, hiding from making tough decisions. I have not played WoW in about 7 months, have started EMT school (something I thought about for years but lacked the courage to try) and spend much more time with my family. Real success is much more rewarding. I went to WoW Detox,. I thought it would be a bunch of losers, but many of the posts hit home. They were normal people who found their lives revolving around this game. Being addicted to a video game makes you feel ridiculous, so it was good to read about others who are the same way. If your husband is anything like me, he is playing WoW for the joy of easy success. Finding ways to gain success in real life is what he needs. I wish you luck, and I hope your husband can get away from WoW.
 
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I just read an article about 2 little kids (<1 and about 2) who were severely neglected because of their parents addiction to that game. They were playing it rather than feeding, bathing, clothing or taking care of their children. I didnt know computer addictions could be that strong, apparently they are.

Could you do some sort of intervention?
 
I played wow for a year and a half and can honestly say it almost ruined my life because I was in college when my addiction hit full bloom. It's a simple game really. A model of a fictional life with instant success and a feeling of accomplishment. What helped me realize my issue was that you can't put "Level 52 Rogue" on your resume. Good luck and keep talkin to him.
 
Ditto... took a year of college away from me. Ugh. One day I just woke up, said to myself "Erik, you need to clean your act up". Canceled the subscription, threw out the alcohol, etc. Haven't looked back. I got a WoW account again to play with a friend about two months ago, but I haven't played it in two weeks, and not feeling tempted to. Kinda like how once out of college drinking every night with your pals kinda loses it's appeal. Get him away from it for a week (go on a vacation somewhere and leave the laptop at home), and let him discover how much he can get done without it.
 
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