I understand that it's appropriate to seek the patient's permission before having random folks present for a delivery. I'm Ok with this, but I had one nurse ask a patient "there's a paramedic student who wants to observe the delivery. You don't have to let him - you're allowed to say no". Yup. Said no. As opposed to "this is Jon, he's a paramedic student, and observing on our unit today in case he ever has to deliver a baby in the field". That worked SO much better.
I don't think that nurse was out of line. A lot of patients feel very uncomfortable saying no to anyone in a white coat, and some don't even understand that it's a real option. Childbirth is stressful enough already, and although your experience is important, the patient comes first. If I were that nurse, I would've combined those statements and tried to make the patient understand that while she could say no, you're not just there for kicks.