poetry

andrey

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I want to see you scarlet lips,
i want to touch you skin,
and night that whispers words of love
will cover us with tears....

I would like to ask you,you are native speakers.What is your opinion about this poetry?
 
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I want to see you scarlet lips,
i want to touch you skin,
and night that whispers words of love
will cover us with tears....

I would like to ask you,you are native speakers.What is your opinion about this poetry?

Umm. Well, I think the word 'you' is an error, and maybe it should be 'your'? Other than that.. I kind of don't understand it. I'm not the best at poetry analysis.. maybe I don't have that whole, Shakespearean slash Edgar Allen Poe thing going on. I'll work on it....:ph34r:
 
So my opinion as a native speaker is that you should find a site for poetry submissions. Try deviantArt and mark your submission as "advanced criticism welcome" or any of the other sites out there. EMS and poetic skill don't seem to cross over well.
 
So my opinion as a native speaker is that you should find a site for poetry submissions. Try deviantArt and mark your submission as "advanced criticism welcome" or any of the other sites out there. EMS and poetic skill don't seem to cross over well.

DeviantART takes poetry now? Didn't know that...haha, I dunno..a lot of the guys at our base look like the type to write poetry :P
 
:rolleyes: OK,i have just omited it.
Cause it is my verse. I wanted to know your opinion.

" EMS and poetic skill don't seem to cross over well"
Why? Poetry heals wound of soul...
I think, you are my brother in professon, so... i have just got reply.
 
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