Does this make me a bad EMT?

Off with her head!

Sasha said:
...but what about the next call that bothers her? Are you going to run...
...Maybe im a hard nose...
but if i was on that scene and you ran, you would no longer be welcome on my scene.
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Sasha, you crack me up! It's not what you say or even how you say it, it's your, um, positional rigidity, yeah, that's it, something about not being swayed which sometimes translates into not quite listening.

First off, the OP has been at this game for four years.
Second, she got blind-sided by a situation that hit home
Third, she DID have options and the patient WAS covered

It's presumptuous on your part to write her off as a medic, and this is not the first time I've seen you do this. I suppose it's the condemnation that bugs me, but honestly, there's something else that causes me alarm.

You seem absolutely convinced that you are impervious.

My experience is that only medics that haven't discovered their "Hot Button" == the one thing, custom-designed, that comes out of nowhere and knocks them for an emotional loop == are the ones most judgmental and least forgiving of those that encounter theirs and then have the guts to admit it rocked their world. They are the ones who brandish the "unpopular" opinion which might be okay if it didn't include judgement.

When you do find your Hot Button, and you will, I hope you will find as much understanding and acceptance here as the OP has. And if you're smart like her, you'll ignore the inevitable Hard Nose and learn from the experience, becoming a better medic in the process.

If you allow her that option, maybe it'll make it easier for us all to allow you the same when you hit your personal wall.

...and if you did run from a call as the OP did, and then quit the profession, as you swore you would, I'd lose a lot of the respect I have for you.
 
I do not think she is a bad EMT. To those who think she is, you one day may freeze up and or run from the scene. We are all human, that hasn't happened to me yet. It may one day. I've been a member of my town service for 3 and a half years.
 
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Sasha said:
Well Linuss claims it was uncontrollable, so if she was sole provider, in Linuss' theory, she would have run too. So where does that leave the patient and family?
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I've already said it once...running in the same direction.

But in all seriousness, that's just speculation (word of the night) right now. We'll never know what she would have done had she been the sole provider, all we know is what she did do. Now, perhaps this was a one time event that will provide her with some insight as to what types of calls might bother her, and if that's it, then thankfully there were other providers there that had the pt. under control. But, if that's not the case, then yes, EMS might not be the career for her, but would I feel comfortable coming to that conclusion with the information that we presently have? Absolutely not.
 
It was a bad call that hit home. If this didn't happen to you then I'd worry you weren't human and I'd call NASA to figure you out! Some people freak out with the baby calls, others freak out with the old people calls, and some other folks freak out with the decapitation calls. It's totally OK to have a call that hits home and freak out a little bit. I am POSITIVE that you would have been able to maintain if you were the only ALS provider on scene. Since you weren't you let your guard down which is 100% ok. You did not compromise patient care. More importantly, you came here seeking peer review and feedback. This might have been a bad idea since not everyone on this site is best suited to give good advice, but it does demonstrate great maturity and responsibility.

You're a great EMT and a great human being. Keep up the good work.
 
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firetender said:
Sasha, you crack me up! It's not what you say or even how you say it, it's your, um, positional rigidity, yeah, that's it, something about not being swayed which sometimes translates into not quite listening.

First off, the OP has been at this game for four years.
Second, she got blind-sided by a situation that hit home
Third, she DID have options and the patient WAS covered

It's presumptuous on your part to write her off as a medic, and this is not the first time I've seen you do this. I suppose it's the condemnation that bugs me, but honestly, there's something else that causes me alarm.

You seem absolutely convinced that you are impervious.

My experience is that only medics that haven't discovered their "Hot Button" == the one thing, custom-designed, that comes out of nowhere and knocks them for an emotional loop == are the ones most judgmental and least forgiving of those that encounter theirs and then have the guts to admit it rocked their world. They are the ones who brandish the "unpopular" opinion which might be okay if it didn't include judgement.

When you do find your Hot Button, and you will, I hope you will find as much understanding and acceptance here as the OP has. And if you're smart like her, you'll ignore the inevitable Hard Nose and learn from the experience, becoming a better medic in the process.

If you allow her that option, maybe it'll make it easier for us all to allow you the same when you hit your personal wall.

...and if you did run from a call as the OP did, and then quit the profession, as you swore you would, I'd lose a lot of the respect I have for you.
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Oh firetender, you shouldn't assume.. you know the saying.

I have found calls that have thrown me for the emotional loop, I have never RUN crying from the scene. I don't know anyone else who has jumped out of an ambulance and run away.

Here are just a few that have made hit some button for me:

Very first code, while younger than my mom by a few years looked just like her with lighter hair with a similar medical history. I walked in the room, she was up and talking, left to grab something, and came back to CPR in progress.

Young lady dying of cervical cancer. I wont go into why this one hit home, it's far too complicated.

Any patient dying of liver failure. My mom's got "The Hep" and diabetes and this is likely how she will die. It's terrible and painful and every time I take them I feel like crying.

An old lady who was neglected by the nursing home and sat in bed with an obviously deformed hip fracture for days in pain. She looked EXACTLY like my Grandma, and I hate to think of her in pain. She did absolutely nothing but scream from the minute we got there to the minute we left. (anyone with white puffy hair looks like my grandma) I wanted to punch a nurse after that.

A homeless man who was set on fire while he was sleeping in the park. He was the sweetest little guy ever, truly heart breaking.

Those calls all hit some nerve, but I never thought of fleeing. There of course are calls I whine "I don't wanna do this call!" but I have a job and an obligation, and I do it well. Fleeing is an inappropriate response.

Emotion is okay. Running away from your call and your patient is not. That is NOT a normal response to a "bad call".

Again, she didn't excuse herself and calmly walk from the scene, she RAN from it. RAN. THAT is what I can not get over and there is absolutely no excuse to run from the scene if you are not in immediate danger.

EMS is not for everyone, there is no shame in not being able to handle it.

And yes, firetender.. I'm listening but I have not been presented with a sufficient argument to sway my stance.
 
I am POSITIVE that you would have been able to maintain if you were the only ALS provider on scene
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How are you positive of that?
 
I'm sorry. Regardless of what you would have or would not have done had you been the sole provider, if you walked or ran out of the ambulance/call as first responder or not you would not be working on a truck with me again. I think it would help for you to talk to someone about this. Sometimes people/providers have trouble with incidents. You were the first on scene, so until someone else arrived and you passed off command, you are in charge of this incident.
Now all other aspects of this incident aside (as I dont want to play monday morning quarterback). The fact that you had this strong of an emotional response, just because you thought they were 7 years younger than they were (hopefully they looked it) is troublesome. I think you need to look hard into yourself at how you are going to deal with this age group should you continue with this career. If you have this kind of reaction whenever there is a serious call for someone who might be your brothers age, then you need to hang it up. For yours, your patients and your partners sake.
 
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If I remember correctly, Sasha did say she ran once, but it was before than made patient contact. What if you had already made it to the patient and then the dog came after you. Then what would you have done. You probably would still have ran, all because if it chased you away then, it would have been worse when you got to his owner. Does that make you a bad EMT/MEDIC. No, it makes you a smart one because you ran for safety. Would you still have quit the job you love like you said you would. No. Why because you would rule it as a safety issue just to justify what you did.
 
hoss42141 said:
If I remember correctly, Sasha did say she ran once, but it was before than made patient contact. What if you had already made it to the patient and then the dog came after you. Then what would you have done. You probably would still have ran, all because if it chased you away then, it would have been worse when you got to his owner. Does that make you a bad EMT/MEDIC. No, it makes you a smart one because you ran for safety. Would you still have quit the job you love like you said you would. No. Why because you would rule it as a safety issue just to justify what you did.
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There is a difference between running away from a call because you can't hack it and running because you're in danger.

Where was the OPs safety issue? Was the dead kid gonna pop up and bust a cap in her?
 
LOL. Running is running. Whether you run for safety because your scared of a dog, or you ran because a scene hit to close to home. The way you talk you are impervious to this kind of thing. Trust me your not. I was in the military and guess what, soldiers did the same thing then. Did they get kicked out of the military. No. They was told to check themselves and get a grip, or they would end up hurting someone else in their unit. It's not the fact that you can't hack it in the job, it's the fact that sometimes in life you are going to hit a road block, and it will hit hard and you will do the same thing. I would love to hear your excuse for.the one mistake that you make that makes you run. Then I would love to see you quit because you are Superwoman and would never do that. Never say never because my dad said he would never be a minister and guess what. He has been one for 19 years now. I can say I would never run from a scene, but there might be that one thing that pushes me over the edge. Will I quit. No, but I will do everything in my power for it not time happen again.
 
Running is not running. Running due to safety of you or your crew is acceptable. Running because the patient might be the same age as a family member and this upsets you is not acceptable. You dont get to choose the age of your patients, and if you are responding to the page, esp in a volunteer setting, you are accepting responsiblity for the incident/patient. If you choose to respond and do this profession, esp if you choose to respond pov before an actual ambulance / rescue unit, you'd better have a grip and be able to get what needs done done. It shouldnt matter that other responders were on scene when you run. That does not make it acceptable. How can they rely on you then?
 
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Sasha said:
How are you positive of that?
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Because this person presents themself as reasonable, mature and introspective. That commands respect.
 
BandageBrigade said:
Running is not running. Running due to safety of you or your crew is acceptable. Running because the patient might be the same age as a family member and this upsets you is not acceptable. You dont get to choose the age of your patients, and if you are responding to the page, esp in a volunteer setting, you are accepting responsiblity for the incident/patient. If you choose to respond and do this profession, esp if you choose to respond pov before an actual ambulance / rescue unit, you'd better have a grip and be able to get what needs done done. It shouldnt matter that other responders were on scene when you run. That does not make it acceptable. How can they rely on you then?
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Yeah, it's never OK to have a call freak you out. Seriously?
 
hoss42141 said:
LOL. Running is running. Whether you run for safety because your scared of a dog, or you ran because a scene hit to close to home. The way you talk you are impervious to this kind of thing. Trust me your not. I was in the military and guess what, soldiers did the same thing then. Did they get kicked out of the military. No. They was told to check themselves and get a grip, or they would end up hurting someone else in their unit. It's not the fact that you can't hack it in the job, it's the fact that sometimes in life you are going to hit a road block, and it will hit hard and you will do the same thing. I would love to hear your excuse for.the one mistake that you make that makes you run. Then I would love to see you quit because you are Superwoman and would never do that. Never say never because my dad said he would never be a minister and guess what. He has been one for 19 years now. I can say I would never run from a scene, but there might be that one thing that pushes me over the edge. Will I quit. No, but I will do everything in my power for it not time happen again.
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Running in the military from a realistic threat is NOT the same as running cause you cant handle a code. the patient was not presenting a threat the patient was dead.

Sent from LuLu using Tapatalk
 
Sasha, berating people usually doesn't inspire them. You attract more bees with honey. Try it out.
 
bstone said:
Sasha, berating people usually doesn't inspire them. You attract more bees with honey. Try it out.
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I agree, but do you honestly think she would do that. We must remember that she is the queen verandas she does no wrong. This is the way the world is. She is right everyone else is wrong. The only help she will offer is to help pack your stuff to your vehicle because you are taking to long to leave.
 
I read that she dealt with what she needed to do, and when she was relived by the higher licensed duty crew she them had a big emotional release that sometimes happens. In no case did she not PERFORM HER DUTIES during all of this.

I wish I were a cold, insensitive bada$$ like all of you but like the OP, I have feelings and compasion and the day I lose those is the day I need to stop doing patient care.
 
I am in no way a big bada$$. I have feelings as well. Some (we won't mention names) believe they are impervious to this type of thing. They are the masters of the EMS world. They do no wrong and everyone else does no right. I would not give up my career that I love for one mistake that, even tho it was already stated that on the next major run she shook her head and did what had to be done. She rebounded from this, but those few still believe that she is wrong and needs to leave.
 
Wow, this really took off..

First off, I would like to, once again, thank everyone for their responses. I'm happy to see that even though I've received negative responses (which I fully expected), I've also received some positive feedback and support.

Second, I'd like to add a few more details that I think have become quite neccessary after some of the comments made against me. Once the patient was in the back of the ambulance, I assisted with suction, ventilations, and protecting the airway. Once that task was transferred over to the crew that came with the ambulance, and the medic was in back with everything loaded, that was when I left. I didn't just go sprinting off without first doing what I needed to do. So, in the case that I was the highest level of certification, I would have been able to keep my composure. It was only when I was finished doing what I needed to do that I lost it. Also, I use the term "run" loosely. If I had known that the word "run" would have twisted my story around so much, I would have been more cautious in choosing a verb. If I may alter the term to "briskly walk." My car was parked behind one of the buildings out of sight to bystanders, and when I "briskly walked" from the ambulance to my car, it wasn't as if I sat on top of my vehicle screaming to the sky. I sat in my car, which was secluded and out of sight, before I let myself cry over it.

For those of you who so badly think I'm an awful person, I truly hope that when you get the call that bothers you, you have a good support system, not people telling you to pack your *stuff* and get out. I appreciate the responses, but some of you don't truly understand the extent. I've had "bad" calls before. Abuse cases, truly sick children, awful car accidents. So I've seen bad stuff. It's not like I have a weak stomach. It's a feeling I could never describe, and wouldn't wish on anyone else.
 
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