Bit Worried

[kit]

Hey, I'm a Student Paramedic, and I've just talked to Paramedic who was telling be about every bad point there is about the job...the nightmares to look forward to - No sleep - Very high divorce rate - Takes over your life sort of thing.

Is it really this bad?

Hi and thanks

 

[Ridryder911]

Hey, I'm a Student Paramedic, and I've just talked to Paramedic who was telling be about every bad point there is about the job...the nightmares to look forward to - No sleep - Very high divorce rate - Takes over your life sort of thing.

Is it really this bad?

Hi and thanks

It all depends upon the person and their coping skills. Technically, research has proven that EMS does not have any higher divorce rate than any other profession. Bad calls, no sleep allowing EMS to take over your life is true if one allows it too. It is very rabid in the system as many allow those attributes, again other professions could say the same thing.

Lack of sleep can be true in many systems, but I also had lack of sleep working night shifts as a RN as well. So again comparison is relative.

Not saying any of those cannot happen; and one needs to be very aware it is a strong possibility but as well many of it is associated with the individuals coping mechanisms. Something to consider, as in any profession.

R/r 911

 

[kit]

Thanks for the reply,

Thats good to know - It was the divorce rate that I was worrying about most

 

[Sapphyre]

whether or not you become part of the divorce rate statistic depends not only on how you handle it, but on how your spouse handles it. Mine couldn't. The vast majority of the husbands of the women who work at my station couldn't either, and not because we made EMS our lives (most of us didn't), but because of the hours, and in many cases a personality shift (or latent personality traits becoming more prominent) combined with most of us having been with these men since shortly after high school.

Just giving you the flip side. It all goes back to what rid said, becoming an EMT(P) does not immediately sign a death warrant on your marriage.

 

[46Young]

The hardest thing for a spouse to adjust to is a rotating schedule, working nights/weekends/holidays, being held over after the end of your shift whether it's for a few hours or 12-24+. Some employers will also wipe the slate clean and change everyone's schedule every few years, or every 6 months in the case of CCEMS.

It's difficult to make plans after work due to late calls and holdover, and some employers give you leave but make it prohibitively difficult to actually use it. Being held after work for coverage or late calls can interfere with child care as well.

The worst schedule you can work is a 24/48 with no kelly's (extra day off every three cycles), especially in a busy system. You work one day, run calls the entire day, get little to no rest, and then need to spend the first day off to recover. that leaves you with only one day for family time where you're 100%. It always feels like you're going back to work the next day. Now add holdover or a side job (EMS pays OK in some places, but you won't do well unless you work extra hours) and you're never home in a rested state.

Some places make it difficult to take leave. One place I worked for required you to get someone to cover your shift for OT before you would get approved. If you work 24's, you can't even plan the start of your vacation that morning because you risk holdover.

Your spouse may not be able to adjust to you being out of the house more nights than you're home. If you've had a particularly tough day, or stressful call, your spouse may not be able to relate or give any positive feedback.

In my case, my wife became pregnant while I was a basic. I chose medic school over RN school as it was quicker, cheaper, decent pay after graduation, and there was still the option afterward to go to RN school either online or in the traditional sense. I worked my scheduled 40 hours, some OT, and spent an average of 32-36 hours weekly between medic class/clinicals for 13 months. This was while my wife was taking care of our infant daughter, often alone for many days and nights. She harbored deep resentment towards me for that, up until I landed my current firemedic job. Life is good now, low financial stress, great work schedule. she understands why I did what I did now, finally.

After graduating medic school, I upgraded to medic at my job and secured a couple of per diem medic gigs at local hospitals as well. Like many other areas, medic money is okay, you'll stay fed, the bills will probably be paid, but you'll never be more than a paycheck away from going into debt. This financial stress can put strain on a marriage "You went to school for all that time, you weren't around AT ALL for over a year, and we're still poor! what good did that do? Now we're 5 grand in debt!" I did what many in EMS do. I worked side jobs. All the hours they would give me. It's blood money, but you'll be able to save for a house, car, college for your children, etc. Medic money is good enough to stay fed, but certainly not enough to prosper. You can make enough as some educated white collar professionals, only if you're willing to work 60-80 hours per week.

That's what I call the medic "black hole". You can live on a medic salary, the money's just good enough for you to do okay with OT and side work. Just good enough that you'll accept that as your reality from now on instead of going back to school for a legitimate degree and a better living. It's more than difficult to go back to school whan you have a family, and need the money from both FT and PT work to survive. You're now stuck for life, basically. You'll work crazy hours and miss countless family/social events until you retire, hopefully with a pension and not a 401k that you can't afford to contribute to anyway.
This is what causes cumulative stress to the relationship. "You can't make Johnny's graduation?" "You're stuck at work again? Okay, I guess we're eating alone as usual." "Why can't we afford a house with all of these hours you work?"

 

[medic_texas]

The hardest thing for a spouse to adjust to is a rotating schedule, working nights/weekends/holidays, being held over after the end of your shift whether it's for a few hours or 12-24+. Some employers will also wipe the slate clean and change everyone's schedule every few years, or every 6 months in the case of CCEMS.

It's difficult to make plans after work due to late calls and holdover, and some employers give you leave but make it prohibitively difficult to actually use it. Being held after work for coverage or late calls can interfere with child care as well.

The worst schedule you can work is a 24/48 with no kelly's (extra day off every three cycles), especially in a busy system. You work one day, run calls the entire day, get little to no rest, and then need to spend the first day off to recover. that leaves you with only one day for family time where you're 100%. It always feels like you're going back to work the next day. Now add holdover or a side job (EMS pays OK in some places, but you won't do well unless you work extra hours) and you're never home in a rested state.

Some places make it difficult to take leave. One place I worked for required you to get someone to cover your shift for OT before you would get approved. If you work 24's, you can't even plan the start of your vacation that morning because you risk holdover.

Your spouse may not be able to adjust to you being out of the house more nights than you're home. If you've had a particularly tough day, or stressful call, your spouse may not be able to relate or give any positive feedback.

In my case, my wife became pregnant while I was a basic. I chose medic school over RN school as it was quicker, cheaper, decent pay after graduation, and there was still the option afterward to go to RN school either online or in the traditional sense. I worked my scheduled 40 hours, some OT, and spent an average of 32-36 hours weekly between medic class/clinicals for 13 months. This was while my wife was taking care of our infant daughter, often alone for many days and nights. She harbored deep resentment towards me for that, up until I landed my current firemedic job. Life is good now, low financial stress, great work schedule. she understands why I did what I did now, finally.

After graduating medic school, I upgraded to medic at my job and secured a couple of per diem medic gigs at local hospitals as well. Like many other areas, medic money is okay, you'll stay fed, the bills will probably be paid, but you'll never be more than a paycheck away from going into debt. This financial stress can put strain on a marriage "You went to school for all that time, you weren't around AT ALL for over a year, and we're still poor! what good did that do? Now we're 5 grand in debt!" I did what many in EMS do. I worked side jobs. All the hours they would give me. It's blood money, but you'll be able to save for a house, car, college for your children, etc. Medic money is good enough to stay fed, but certainly not enough to prosper. You can make enough as some educated white collar professionals, only if you're willing to work 60-80 hours per week.

That's what I call the medic "black hole". You can live on a medic salary, the money's just good enough for you to do okay with OT and side work. Just good enough that you'll accept that as your reality from now on instead of going back to school for a legitimate degree and a better living. It's more than difficult to go back to school whan you have a family, and need the money from both FT and PT work to survive. You're now stuck for life, basically. You'll work crazy hours and miss countless family/social events until you retire, hopefully with a pension and not a 401k that you can't afford to contribute to anyway.
This is what causes cumulative stress to the relationship. "You can't make Johnny's graduation?" "You're stuck at work again? Okay, I guess we're eating alone as usual." "Why can't we afford a house with all of these hours you work?"

Great post and dead on with my view of EMS. I was going through a divorce when I was in nursing school, it was very difficult but I was fortunate and honestly, blessed (for reasons unknown). I had a couple jobs that paid well in the county, low call volume (which allowed me to sleep and study), and paid my bills. If it wasn't for that, I'd still be "stuck".

 

[MSDeltaFlt]

Hey, I'm a Student Paramedic, and I've just talked to Paramedic who was telling be about every bad point there is about the job...the nightmares to look forward to - No sleep - Very high divorce rate - Takes over your life sort of thing.

Is it really this bad?

Hi and thanks

It all depends upon the person and their coping skills. Technically, research has proven that EMS does not have any higher divorce rate than any other profession. Bad calls, no sleep allowing EMS to take over your life is true if one allows it too. It is very rabid in the system as many allow those attributes, again other professions could say the same thing.

Lack of sleep can be true in many systems, but I also had lack of sleep working night shifts as a RN as well. So again comparison is relative.

Not saying any of those cannot happen; and one needs to be very aware it is a strong possibility but as well many of it is associated with the individuals coping mechanisms. Something to consider, as in any profession.

R/r 911

Absolutely. There is a difference between allowing one's career control your life (if one chooses to do so) and allowing one's job control your life. I love my career. Love being a medic and being a flight medic. I thoroughly enjoy the persona that comes with it.

However, once I am relieved at shift change, I make it a point to un-*ss that place in a New York minute. I am going home. To get away from there. To not let that place control my life.

The worst schedule you can work is a 24/48 with no kelly's (extra day off every three cycles), especially in a busy system. You work one day, run calls the entire day, get little to no rest, and then need to spend the first day off to recover. that leaves you with only one day for family time where you're 100%. It always feels like you're going back to work the next day. Now add holdover or a side job (EMS pays OK in some places, but you won't do well unless you work extra hours) and you're never home in a rested state.

I beg to differ here. The worst shift you can work is a 3-2 split on 24hr shifts: Work, work, off, off, work, work, work, off, off, work, work, off, off,off in a 2 week period. Some ambulance services work this schedule. You are in uniform and on duty 6 complete months out of the year. That, my friend, is where it gets dangerous.

 

[trevor1189]

I can definitely see how it can be hard. Especially for families. Me, just getting into EMS as a volunteer EMT, I can tell you when the pager goes off and I have to get up in the middle of dinner or whatever with family and friends and go, they don't especially like it... :sad:

 

[MJordan2121]

Everyone copes differentely when it comes to the job and the demands that it will bring. Their are many positives and negatives to any job. You will have calls with good outcomes and some that are the opposite. I am a paramedic student as well and have worked out in the field for the last two years as a basic. I have already learned some new things in the last two weeks since entering paramedic school. You learn to sleep when you can. Talk with your spouse about the challenges of your job and find ways to incorporate your schedules so that you can spend as much time together as possible.

Hey, I'm a Student Paramedic, and I've just talked to Paramedic who was telling be about every bad point there is about the job...the nightmares to look forward to - No sleep - Very high divorce rate - Takes over your life sort of thing.

Is it really this bad?

Hi and thanks

 

[bunkie]

Been married to the army for a long time now and have done several deployments, the last three were one year tours. At the start of one right now. My marriage right now isn't doing so well with my husband because of his PTSD from Iraq so I have one bit of advice for you. Whatever upsets you at work, leave it there. Don't bring it home and dump it on your partner and make them suffer for it. Your marriage will be stronger for it.

ETA: To clarify. Feel free to talk to your partner, unwind and unload, but dont take your anger from the job to that person. If that makes better sense

 

[Onceamedic]

It is very important to have realistic expectations of the job and to make sure you know exactly what it is that you are after. That being said, you never really know until you get into it. I work for a private. The hours are brutal, the pay sucks and corporate politics stink.
If I was a young person with a life to build, there is no way I could get the financial security and position that I enjoy now working EMS, especially as I have zero interest in fire.
I am fortunate that I have a husband that understands me and my life. He is a Vietnam combat vet and totally gets some of the more stressful aspects of the job and the lack of structure. Your spouse has to be a strong person with an independent spirit because they are going to be alone a lot.
I focus on what I love to do - which is patient care and ignore the rest of it (I mean money, hours, etc.) I feel pretty lucky that I didn't know about EMS when I was younger. I would be "stuck" like many people and resentful of it.

 

[46Young]

Absolutely. There is a difference between allowing one's career control your life (if one chooses to do so) and allowing one's job control your life. I love my career. Love being a medic and being a flight medic. I thoroughly enjoy the persona that comes with it.

However, once I am relieved at shift change, I make it a point to un-*ss that place in a New York minute. I am going home. To get away from there. To not let that place control my life.



I beg to differ here. The worst shift you can work is a 3-2 split on 24hr shifts: Work, work, off, off, work, work, work, off, off, work, work, off, off,off in a 2 week period. Some ambulance services work this schedule. You are in uniform and on duty 6 complete months out of the year. That, my friend, is where it gets dangerous.

So, you work 24's as WWOOWWWOOWWOOO? A variation of a 24/24? I thought that only DoD FF's had that kind of schedule. A friend of mine worked as a flight medic and still kept his FT CCEMT-P job in NY pending sale of his home. He worked 2 24's per week. I hope you're being paid well. That schedule IS the worst. You spend half f your life or more at work.

My point about the 24/48 is that the original intention of working 24's was that you'd get at least a few hours of sleep on shift. When you work constantly for 24 hours or more, it's detrimental to your health, your partner's, and your pt's. Some agencies even nickle and dime their employees by going paid on call from the hours of 2200-0600. you only get paid if you're awakwnwd for a call, but you still need to be in station otherwise.