Dealing with Angry Partners

[speakofblue]

Hi,

I know this has been discussed in various forms, like on the "Do I Tell the Boss" thread. There are also some good responses on "how do you handle your unruly medic partner?" (http://www.emtlife.com/showthread.php?t=9256&highlight=partner)

But, I wanted to address the issue directly.

I have a partner with anger issues. The person can be verbally abusive to me, patients, and their families. However, I've seen my partner behave quite nicely to some patients. The person's behavior is erratic.

How do you constructively deal with angry partners? Perhaps discussing their anger issue while they're in a good mood...followed by giving examples of when they acted kindly and encouraging to act like this on a more regular basis. This hasn't reached the point of "creating a hostile work environment," but I want to nip the issue in the bud. Plus, I feel like there must be better ways of handling it than crying to management and giving the person a record.

Thanks for your feedback.

 

[traumateam1]

speakofblue, sounds like quite a problem. Like someone said in the "how do you handle your unruly medic partner?" thread talk to your supervisor - that's why they are there. If this is an issue that needs to be dealt with with counseling or meds or something than it has to be dealt with directly. Talk to the supervisor and set up a meeting with the 3 of you. Tell him and the supervisor this is how you act sometimes, then you suddenly become rude to me, other coworkers, patients, and their families. Sounds like he might have a psychological problem.

How do you constructively deal with angry partners? Perhaps discussing their anger issue while they're in a good mood...followed by giving examples of when they acted kindly and encouraging to act like this on a more regular basis.

This isn't the best idea, if he just suddenly turns into a bad mood hearing something like this might make him flip out. However if you do this while in a meeting with your supervisor he is less likely to freak out and might actually listen. Every person is different and will react in a different way. The best advice I have for You is set up a meeting with your supervisor, you and him. Express your concerns about his "mood swings" and have this problem dealt with directly. Don't beat around the bush like many people do.
Hope everything gets straightened out.

 

[BossyCow]

I've found that in most cases similar to this, the offending person usually has no idea that their behavior is viewed the way that you are seeing it. It is all very subjective. For example, I had a sit down talk with two of my volunteers with the chief in the room, regarding their treatment plan on a pt that according to protocols should have had an ALS assessment but didn't. I know that these two women tend to be a bit sensitive to criticism, so I had the chief sit in the room with me, and I was extremely careful to be proactive, gentle but firm in the correction. I kept it about the care and the issue of pt safety and made no personal references at all.

Later the chief, who was in the room during the entire talk, was approached by a family member of the volunteers wanting me sanctioned for being mean, hateful, angry and yelling at them. Perception.....

So, do nothing one on one with this person. Make every interaction regarding the behavioral issue in the presence of a shop steward, supervisor, or other neutral party. My guess is that if this person has that issue, you are not the first, nor will you be the last to experience it.

Be comforted that everyone there knows who this person is and how they act. Document anything you see as 'hostile' or 'threatening'. Document, document, document. Do not go looking for reassurance that this guy is a jerk from other workers. Do not try to get others to take sides, either to support you or denigrate him. It will not go well for either of you if you do.

Be mature and realize that every workplace has one guy like this (minimum) and simply try to find a way to deal with his behavior as best you can. Draw a line beyond which you file a report on his behavior and let the rest of the petty stuff slide.

 

[speakofblue]

thanks

Sorry for the late response. Thanks for all your suggestions. I appreciate it.